As the sun dipped below the horizon around seven or eight o'clock, the swimmers along the riverbank gradually dispersed. Twenty or so plastic tables were scattered across the sand as the night market snack stalls began their business. A few groups, like Tan Junzi and her friends, had set up their own grills to barbecue.
On the bustling riverbank, the smoky aroma of grilled meat was carried by the river breeze, mingled with the scent of cigarettes from the men nearby.
They ate slowly, in no rush at all; after all, they had the whole night ahead of them. Since Chang Ying was sitting by the grill, he spent most of his time cooking and barely ate a bite.
A particular game was very popular back then, similar to Truth or Dare, except the "dare" was replaced by drinking. A special drink would be prepared; if you chose the dare, you had to turn around while the others mixed a concoction for you, which you then had to finish entirely.
Some people were truly ruthless, adding vinegar, salt, chili, and soy sauce—anything they could think of that wouldn't actually kill you. A cup of murky, "dark" liquid that made you want to gag just from the smell would be placed before you, and everyone would hold your nose to make you gulp it down.
That was the game they were playing. Qin Ke had gone to the supermarket earlier and hauled back a crate of Tsingtao beer, so the base of the special drinks was beer. Not only that, but the "seasonings" available included the white spirit used for marinating meat, pepper powder, bean paste, and chili flakes—more than enough to prank anyone.
At first, they sat in a circle calling out numbers. Any number containing a 7 or a multiple of 7 was forbidden; whoever messed up had to drink the concoction.
Look at the lineup:
Zhang Da, the math class representative.
Qin Ruanshu, who never had to try hard to excel in school.
Yuan Guo, a sharp-witted spirit.
Chang Ying, a sly old dog.
Qin Ke, well, that goes without saying.
The only ones left were Tan Junzi and Liu Kan. Indeed, their loss rates were split fifty-fifty. If it wasn't Tan Junzi losing, it was Liu Kan. One was easily flustered, and the other was just a bit slow.
Under 100, it was fine; almost no one made a mistake. But once they got past 400 or 500, the speed picked up, and everyone became increasingly devious, setting traps for the person after them. For instance, when someone finished their turn and it was your go, someone else would whisper the number you were supposed to say under their breath. If you got anxious and spoke without thinking, you’d stand up and walk right into the trap.
Tan Junzi was exactly the type to get flustered. Often, while she was still calculating in her head and her turn came, Yuan Guo would rush her from across the table or distract her. She would immediately stand up and shout:
"441!"
The group would slap the table and laugh: "Drink!"
Every time it was Tan Junzi’s turn to drink, before the cup could even reach her, Chang Ying would take it and down it in one go without so much as a flinch. Liu Kan marveled, "Chang Ying is a real man." When Liu Kan drank, he had to hold his nose and pause several times to finish one cup of that vile concoction, but Chang Ying just tilted his head back.
Consequently, Chang Ying never lost a round, but he spent the entire evening drinking in silence. He didn't say much that night, and the others simply assumed he had drunk too much.
Zhang Da and the others were in a bit of a vengeful mood when they added the ingredients: white spirit for marinating mixed with beer, sprinkled with pepper and chili, poured over with light soy sauce, dark soy sauce, and aged vinegar, then stirred with a chopstick. *Oh, you want to be the hero saving the beauty? Then drink up.*
As the night deepened, a large white screen was set up by the river to play a romantic comedy. The speakers crackled, and half the sound was carried away over the water by the wind. The picture quality was poor—likely a bootleg copy—so the experience was half watching and half guessing. Fortunately, the movie lacked logic anyway; one second the couple was arguing, and the next, the lead actors were making out.
The group ate and played until they grew tired of the game, eventually turning their focus to the movie.
Logic aside, the film told the story of a young couple growing through love. There were plenty of kissing scenes.
Seeing a scene where the male lead grabbed the female lead’s head and started devouring her lips after a disagreement, Tan Junzi happened to get choked by some chili flakes. She turned away and sneezed: *Achoo!*
Yuan Guo teased, "One sneeze—who’s thinking about you?"
Chang Ying looked at Tan Junzi. She hadn't tied her hair in a ponytail today; she had left it down most of the time, only loosely gathering it into a low ponytail with a hair tie during dinner. Now, several stray strands had fallen out, framing her cheeks. It looked very different from her usual, meticulous high ponytail—it looked exceptionally soft and gentle.
Qin Ruanshu stared at the big screen, discussing it with everyone in the spirit of academic research: "So far, the leads have argued five times and kissed six times. Every time, the guy has to cradle the back of the girl's head. The movements are all the same; it’s really uncreative."
Liu Kan spoke like a man of experience: "What else are they supposed to do? Like kissing gouramis? You keep your hands behind your back, she keeps hers behind hers, and you stand eight feet apart, stretching your necks for a peck? You might as well go to an aquarium; why watch a movie?"
Qin Ruanshu rolled her eyes at him. "Fine, we know you have experience."
Liu Kan nodded. "You're right, I do... I used to." He was a bit drunk, answering with a dazed expression, and his heart skipped a beat as soon as the words left his mouth.
Just then, the table shook violently. Zhang Da was quick to steady it.
It turned out Yuan Guo had tried to kick Liu Kan under the table but ended up kicking the umbrella pole in the center instead.
With a loud *thud*, before anyone realized what had happened, they saw Yuan Guo slumped over the table with a pained expression.
"Are you okay?" Tan Junzi leaned in to check.
"Of course I'm not okay," Yuan Guo pouted, looking miserable.
Tan Junzi checked by the light; Yuan Guo’s foot was scraped. It was bleeding slightly, but it wasn't a big deal. However, Yuan Guo was suddenly overcome with an immense sense of grievance—a feeling that stemmed largely from Liu Kan’s previous comment rather than the pain in her foot.
Qin Ke nudged Liu Kan. "Take her to get that treated. She’s barefoot and has a scrape; don't let the sand get in it."
In truth, no one dared to ask how things were between Liu Kan and Yuan Guo lately. Since both were friends and both were present, everyone just maintained the somewhat awkward atmosphere without bringing it up.
Tan Junzi only knew that Yuan Guo was currently single and hadn't dated anyone new for a month, but whether she and Liu Kan had reconciled was unclear.
In this situation, since her brother had spoken up, anyone with eyes could see what was going on. Liu Kan was clearly pursuing Yuan Guo again, and Yuan Guo was letting him.
Liu Kan stopped acting stiff. He walked over somewhat woodenly, half-squatted, and looked Yuan Guo in the eye.
"I'll take you back to the guesthouse and fix you up?" Liu Kan’s breath smelled of alcohol; the mixture of beer and white spirit from the special drinks was quite pungent.
Yuan Guo looked disgusted, saying, "Ugh, don't talk toward me, you reek of booze," yet she opened her arms to let Liu Kan pick her up.
Liu Kan carefully lifted Yuan Guo, not daring to breathe too loudly for fear of offending her again. To an outsider, the spectacle made it look like Yuan Guo was about to have a limb amputated.
Yuan Guo was petite and thin, so Liu Kan carried her effortlessly. Wearing his large flip-flops, he stepped through the sand, walking back to the guesthouse one step at a time.
After the two left, the table became much quieter.
For a moment, no one knew what to say. The charcoal in the grill crackled.
Qin Ke stood up. "I'm going to smoke a cigarette over there."
Zhang Da said, "Just smoke here. Look, people at the other tables are smoking; no one cares."
Qin Ke glanced at Chang Ying and left on his own. "Forget it, there are girls at the table."
Not long after Qin Ke returned, Tan Junzi suggested they head back early to rest. Everyone agreed.
They returned the rented table and chairs. The remaining barbecue tools weren't heavy, so Zhang Da shouldered them alone as they walked toward the guesthouse.
Chang Ying lagged behind. Tan Junzi waited for him, falling back as well. "Did you drink too much?"
Chang Ying didn't speak. He stopped walking.
He reached down and took hold of Tan Junzi’s wrist. "A little. Junzi, stay out here with me for a bit to clear my head. No rush to go back."
Tan Junzi felt that Chang Ying was acting strange tonight. First, he hadn't said much, and second, he had just called her "Junzi." They were close, but they had never used nicknames since they were kids; they always called each other by their full names. He rarely—one could say never—called her just "Junzi."
Chang Ying didn't let go of her wrist. He led her along the riverbank for a short distance before standing still. The river water occasionally washed over their feet, feeling a bit chilly.
"Chang Ying, does your stomach hurt?" Tan Junzi was a bit worried.
When they were children, Chang Ying had basically caught every illness possible, including but not limited to gastroenteritis. That time he got gastroenteritis was because the potatoes at home were about to go bad, so the nanny made stir-fried potato shreds for three days straight. On the third night, Chang Ying developed a fever and wouldn't stop vomiting. When he was sent to the hospital and lay on the bed like a wilted bean sprout, Tan Junzi’s heart had ached for him.
Chang Ying turned to face Tan Junzi.
"It hurts." He nodded, then shook his head. "But it’s not my stomach."
Tan Junzi looked up at him, wondering if he had grown taller again. The boy’s voice was weak, and his messy hair partially covered his forehead, making him look dejected and very off.
Tan Junzi hesitated, wondering if she should feel his forehead to see if he had a fever.
She raised her other, unheld hand to touch his forehead, but it was as if a switch had been flipped. Chang Ying reached out and accurately caught her other hand. Then, with one large hand gripping both her wrists, he used his other arm to exert a bit of force, pulling Tan Junzi by the shoulder into his embrace.
"!" Tan Junzi’s head was pressed against his chest by his large hand. Only a thin layer of clothing separated her ear from his chest.
*Thump-thump, thump-thump.* It was so close she could clearly hear his heartbeat.
"Chang Ying?" Tan Junzi asked softly, her head buried.
*Thump-thump, thump-thump...* Tan Junzi seemed to hear her own heartbeat as well.
Chang Ying didn't answer. Silently, he stroked her hair, and then, in the process, gently slid off her hair tie. Her long hair cascaded down instantly. His fingers combed through it stroke by stroke, weaving through the strands. Occasionally, his fingers brushed against her ear, sending a shiver through her.
Tan Junzi felt her throat tighten; her whole body was trembling. Actually, she wasn't shaking, but it felt as though she were. Her every nerve was dancing along with the movement of Chang Ying’s fingers.
After a long while.
"Do you know what you are?" Chang Ying’s voice was hazy and a bit raspy. He sounded drunk, yet also very sober. It was very different from his usual tone—a bit like a villain in a TV drama, carrying a hint of dangerous temptation.
Tan Junzi asked softly, "What am I?"
Chang Ying stopped stroking her hair and instead rested his head on her shoulder, burying his face in her hair.
His words brushed against her neck with every breath.
"You are my pearl."
Tan Junzi felt as if a fuse had been lit on her neck, the flame traveling straight to her brain and exploding. What... pearl?
"Guess what I am?" Chang Ying said again.
"What are you?" Tan Junzi’s brain was currently only capable of a simple Q&A. Whatever Chang Ying asked, she repeated; she couldn't think at all.
"I am the clam."
After saying this, Chang Ying released his grip on her wrists and wrapped both arms around her. He hunched over, almost enveloping her, tucking her firmly into his embrace.
"I'm wrapping you up now, so no one else can see my pearl," Chang Ying said in a slightly hurt tone.
Tan Junzi was muffled and held tight, standing slightly on her tiptoes. Seemingly sensing this, Chang Ying bent down further so she could stand flat on the ground. Tan Junzi felt much more comfortable.
"Do you know?" Chang Ying said.
"Know what?"
"You, this pearl, are particularly disobedient. You shine so brightly that everyone looks at you. So now I’m taking you back and wrapping you up. I won't let anyone else look at you." By the end, Chang Ying’s voice actually carried a hint of a sob.
Tan Junzi was startled. In her dazed state, her heart softened completely. She pushed slightly against his chest. "Are you crying?" Chang Ying held her even tighter. Then he said:
"Tan Junzi, all you know how to do is bully me."
"How did I bully you?"
"I, this clam, only have you as my one pearl. When it rains, I close my shell for fear you'll get wet. When the sun comes out, I open my shell to let you bask in it. I've raised you to be so beautiful, yet you go and hug other people. I... I'm sad." Chang Ying remained buried in her shoulder. He sounded just like a child, incredibly aggrieved.
Now Tan Junzi was certain he was truly drunk, given this crying and fussing.
"I didn't go around hugging other people. Don't cry," Tan Junzi comforted him. As soon as she said it, she froze. *Hugging other people...?*
So Chang Ying was acting like this because he was jealous. And she realized—Chang Ying liked her. Wait, he liked her? He liked her! Aside from the surprise, she found that she didn't feel conflicted or awkward; instead, she felt a sense of calm.
Chang Ying continued to himself, "I'm holding you, why aren't you holding me back?"
"Isn't it because... aren't you a clam? I'm inside your shell, I can't hold you," Tan Junzi complained, her voice slightly breathless from being squeezed. Not only did she complain, she even followed the logic of this drunken boy.
"Then I'll open up just a little bit. Reach your hands out and hold me." Chang Ying loosened his grip slightly. Tan Junzi reached out and slowly wrapped her arms around him.
"Hold me tighter," Chang Ying commanded childishly.
"Okay." Tan Junzi held him a bit tighter. "Is this okay?"
"...Mm, it's alright," Chang Ying said with satisfaction.
Tan Junzi felt a bit lightheaded. On one hand, she had realized Chang Ying’s feelings. On the other, she had realized her own.
The river water occasionally reached their calves.
Under the moonlight, by the riverbank, in the springtime, they held each other for a long time.
"Tan Junzi." Chang Ying rubbed his nose against her ear, reluctantly pulling away from her neck. He looked down at her.
Tan Junzi’s face was flushed, partly from being smothered.
"I discovered..." Chang Ying stared into her eyes without blinking.
Embarrassed by his gaze, Tan Junzi asked, "Discovered what?"
"I discovered that there’s a fish living in your eyes," the boy said with utter seriousness.
"Huh?" Tan Junzi blinked.
"Mm." Chang Ying affirmed his own thought. "Otherwise, why would there be ripples in your eyes? There must be a little fish living inside."
Before Tan Junzi could speak, Chang Ying’s kiss fell. It landed on her eye. The boy’s lips were a bit cool but very soft, just lightly brushing against her eyelid.
"You're so beautiful. You're the most beautiful pearl. I'm the wealthiest clam. I can't lose you." Chang Ying sighed softly.
"I'm sorry, Tan Junzi."
"Sorry for what?" Tan Junzi was so weak from the kiss she could hardly stand; all her strength relied on Chang Ying’s arms. She answered in barely a whisper.
"I really want to kiss your mouth, but I drank alcohol, so it smells bad. I can't kiss your mouth today. I'm sorry." Chang Ying’s head nodded as if he were about to fall asleep. He seemed quite drunk, his face showing a mixture of innocent and conflicted grievance. "I'm really sorry."
...
Tan Junzi supported Chang Ying as they walked back. He was still going on about clams and pearls.
"Our Junzi is a saltwater pearl."
"Why?" Tan Junzi felt a headache coming on.
"Because saltwater pearls are more expensive than freshwater pearls," Chang Ying said matter-of-factly.
"...Is that also from *The Secrets to Wealth*?" Tan Junzi was speechless.
"Mm, that really was in *The Secrets to Wealth*," Chang Ying nodded solemnly.
"...Then what was in the fake *Secrets to Wealth*?" Tan Junzi turned her head to ask him.
This time, Chang Ying didn't respond.
"Lift your foot," Tan Junzi bent down.
"What for?"
"To put the shoes back on our family's clam."
After much effort, she finally transported Chang Ying back to the guesthouse. Surprisingly, Liu Kan wasn't in the room.
Tan Junzi settled Chang Ying onto the bed and placed a glass of water on the nightstand. She was about to leave when Chang Ying caught the hem of her shirt.
The orange glow of the bedside lamp made the boy’s features look incredibly soft, like a large canine.
"Junzi. I like you so much," Chang Ying sighed in a half-asleep murmur.
Tan Junzi leaned down and kissed his forehead, gently prying his hand away. "Go to sleep... Tomorrow we... Tomorrow when you wake up."
Chang Ying didn't reply again, seemingly having fallen fast asleep.
As she left, Tan Junzi reached over and switched off the lamp.
Hearing the sound of the door closing, and after a long while had passed, Chang Ying opened his eyes.
In the darkness, he smiled. Then he sat up, walked to the bathroom, and began to wash up.
***
| Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation |
| :--- | :--- | :--- |
| 真心话大冒险 | Truth or Dare | A classic party game. |
| 黑暗饮料 | vile concoction / dark drink | Refers to the gross mixtures made during the drinking game. |
| 致富经 | The Secrets to Wealth | Likely referring to a real CCTV-7 program about agricultural business/wealth, used here as a running joke for Chang Ying's random facts. |
| 蚌 | Clam | Used in the metaphor of a clam protecting its pearl. |
| 珍珠 | Pearl | Chang Ying's metaphor for Tan Junzi. |
