In the deep of the night, Liang Juejun woke as her intoxication faded. Wrapped in the sleeping bag, she felt a sense of constriction and, sensing something unusual as she turned over, she jolted awake. Seeing Xia Yinuo asleep beside her, she understood the situation immediately. Taking in the sleeping bag and quilt covering herself, and then Xia Yinuo sitting there in her thin clothes with only a single blanket draped over her, Liang Juejun’s heart instantly softened.
*Has she been sleeping like this all this time?* She checked her watch; it was four in the morning. Liang Juejun crawled out of the sleeping bag and called out softly, "Xiao Xia?" Xia Yinuo was deep in sleep and showed no sign of waking; she merely furrowed her brows and continued her slumber without so much as a hum.
Seeing this, Liang Juejun simply eased Xia Yinuo down onto the moisture-proof mat. Before she could even cover her properly, Xia Yinuo rolled over, pulled the blanket tight around herself, and continued to sleep soundly. Liang Juejun couldn't help but smile at the sight. Once Xia Yinuo was settled, Liang Juejun put on her coat, unzipped the tent, and quietly stepped outside.
It was truly cold out now, a far cry from the earlier half of the night. The wind was strong, whipping her hair into a mess. It was no wonder campers brought so much professional gear; at this hour, even a down jacket wouldn't have been overkill. Having slept off the alcohol, Liang Juejun felt exceptionally clear-headed. She didn't wander far, choosing instead to stand by the tent. Looking up, the sky was still filled with stars and the brilliant light of the moon. For a moment, memories of her mother, her father, her childhood in America, and Tracy all came rushing back. She felt a fleeting sense of being lost, but it wasn't the same chaos and sorrow as before. Now, there was more clarity and a sense of letting go. And then there was the person named Xia Yinuo, who appeared in the tapestry of her memories with those bright, steady eyes.
Xia Yinuo was having a dream. She dreamt she was at a crossroads. When the light turned red, Liang Juejun walked across from the other side. Xia Yinuo hurried forward, wanting to catch her hand, but she was blocked on the other side of the crosswalk. She watched helplessly as Liang Juejun walked further and further away. In her desperation, she cried out, "Don't go!" and suddenly jolted awake. Liang Juejun was nowhere to be seen, and she found herself lying in the spot that had originally belonged to the other woman.
Ignoring her thin clothing, Xia Yinuo unzipped the tent and looked up to see Liang Juejun standing about ten meters away. Liang Juejun heard the noise and turned back to see the anxiety in Xia Yinuo’s eyes.
"Senior!"
"I'm here."
"Why did you come out? How long have you been standing here?" Xia Yinuo grabbed Liang Juejun’s hands, finding them ice-cold. "It's so cold, what if you catch a cold?"
Liang Juejun withdrew one hand and placed it over Xia Yinuo’s, patting it gently. "It’s alright. I just wanted to come out for a walk."
"Oh. There’s hot water in the thermos. Do you want some?"
"Sure. I don't know how I fell asleep after that wine. Thank you for the blanket and the sleeping bag," Liang Juejun said softly, her eyes shimmering with emotion.
As Xia Yinuo went to get the thermos, she felt a familiar clumsiness in front of Liang Juejun. The way Liang Juejun was looking at her now was far too easy to drown in.
Liang Juejun stepped forward to take the cup. "Let's watch the sunrise. It should be about time."
"Okay."
They spread the moisture-proof mat on the ground and sat side-by-side once more, waiting for the first light of dawn to touch the horizon.
"Can I ask you a question?" Liang Juejun asked.
"Of course."
"That time we had dinner, you mentioned wanting to set aside time to do the things you like. What kind of things were you talking about?"
"Traveling the world, living free and unfettered. No music to confuse the ear, no official documents to weary the body," Xia Yinuo replied. Clad in her bright orange and red gear, her expression was pure and clean. When she spoke those words, she looked like a middle school student harboring innocent expectations for the future.
"Ha, I know that one! *An Eulogy on My Humble Abode*!"
"Oh? I almost forgot. Senior, when did you move abroad?"
"After I finished elementary school. But our neighbor, Mrs. Ye, ran a Chinese class, so I kept studying. She taught us *An Eulogy on My Humble Abode*."
"That's impressive! Even though students in China all learn it, they don't necessarily remember it."
"I only have a superficial understanding; it's not as impressive as you make it sound. Over the years, English has become my primary language. Isn't it a bit tragic when you realize that many things you say instinctively are in English, and you don't even know the Chinese terms for professional jargon?"
"At least you're learning. Nowadays, primary and secondary education in China is all about mastering English. My high school Chinese teacher used to say: 'If you killed someone in a past life, you'll teach Chinese in this one.' It shows how little students and parents value Chinese education now. Many university majors use bilingual teaching just to keep up with international standards."
"True. But one should still master their mother tongue first; it's a form of cultural heritage."
"Kids these days... they really need to experience some hardship to grow."
"You talk as if you're so old and have suffered so much yourself."
"Haha, sorry. I'm just being a 'cynical youth' for a moment. I have a much younger brother, and my family often lectures him like that." *Little brother of the Xia family, I wonder what you'll be like when you grow up. Your sister is looking forward to it.*
"Then how do you view the suffering one endures in life?" Liang Juejun seemed intent on getting to the bottom of the matter.
"Suffering? Let me think... I think suffering brews a more authentic life; it is the capital for tolerance and empathy. It's only when one wallows in suffering that it becomes something more foul and terrifying than the person themselves. Only sublimated suffering is a priceless treasure—a wealth of life."
"Sublimated suffering?"
"Yes. Life isn't just about happiness and joy. A proper amount of suffering is an experience. Life itself is one big experience."
"What if, in that experience, the pain outweighs the joy?"
"Real life is inevitably full of constraints and burdens. If it truly comes to that, I only hope to live simply and purely. But I believe there will always be someone to lead you out of the gloom—just like a fog light in these mountains before the break of dawn, guiding your way out."
Liang Juejun didn't respond. She simply stared blankly at the distant sky. The horizon was gradually turning the color of a fish's belly, yet above them, the stars still lingered, and the moon remained hung in the west. The three elements merged into a singular, wondrous sight.
We often overlook so much of the scenery in our lives. From dawn to dusk, from the earth to the sky, everything is a treasure of nature. The partings and reunions, the joys and the tears—they are all the irrigation of life. They say it is darkest just before the dawn, when all things quietly await the moment the east breaks into light, as if everything can begin anew. And within Liang Juejun’s heart, a rising clarity and tenderness were blooming—something Xia Yinuo did not yet know.
***
