As the first light of dawn broke, a maidservant arrived once more to urge Young Master Yan to take his medicine. Zhongli Zixi followed her out. Ye Jun’s condition had improved significantly today, and he managed to get out of bed to see his master to the door.
The moment they stepped over the threshold, he noticed that the meddlesome Ze Que was still perched upon a tree branch outside the courtyard.
Ye Jun felt a sudden, inexplicable surge of irritation.
"Go back and rest. There is no need to see me off," Zhongli Zixi said, turning back toward him.
"Young Master," Ye Jun said, suddenly leaning in close to whisper in his ear. "Help me check if my fever has broken yet."
Hearing this, Zhongli Zixi raised his hand and pressed his knuckles against Ye Jun’s brow. "Hmm, it seems to have subsided..."
Ye Jun shook his head. "Young Master, a person's fingers are rougher than other parts of the body. Sometimes you can't feel the temperature difference that way."
Zhongli Zixi asked doubtfully, "Is that so?"
"You have to use your forehead," Ye Jun insisted.
Such a method did indeed exist. Suspecting nothing, Zhongli Zixi reached up to brush the stray hairs away from Ye Jun’s forehead. With his other hand pressed against the back of Ye Jun’s head, he pulled the man—who was slightly taller than himself—down a fraction and gently pressed his own forehead against the center of Ye Jun’s brow. After a brief pause, he concluded, "The fever is indeed gone."
At that moment, the two of them stood beneath the eaves of the corridor. With Ye Jun’s back to the courtyard, it appeared from the outside as if the Second Young Master had proactively sought a kiss from his guard.
A moment later, Ye Jun heard a satisfying *thud* as something tumbled out of the tree outside.
The Second Young Master heard the noise, then saw the sly, wicked smirk on Ye Jun’s face, and immediately realized what was happening.
"You..." The Second Young Master sighed helplessly. "You truly grow more petty by the day."
As the season transitioned into early summer, the days became filled with a lingering, fine drizzle. The schemes Ye Jun had used to manipulate the Second Young Master were beginning to demand their price.
Since childhood, Ye Jun had been blessed with startlingly good luck, as if favored by the heavens. Even during his days in the Night Walkers, when he lived with his hand on his sword, he had rarely been injured. Later, after following the Second Young Master, most battles were effortless affairs where the enemy was as easy to cut through as vegetables. On the rare occasions the enemy was too strong, he hadn't even had the chance to struggle. Having been pampered by his own luck for so long, he was now quite fragile when it came to enduring pain.
The deep scars on his chest now ached incessantly whenever it rained. During those first few days of agonizing pain, he had gritted his teeth and endured, thinking that would be the end of it. He had no idea he would face this endless, future torment.
Ye Jun did not wish to disturb his master, but in the middle of the night, the pain became so severe that he couldn't help but curl up, clutching his chest. Zhongli Zixi had always been a light sleeper; hearing the unusually heavy, ragged breathing beside him, he woke up. In the cold moonlight, he saw Ye Jun’s pale face and asked hurriedly, "Is the wound hurting again?"
Ye Jun gave a weak murmur of affirmation.
Understanding the situation perfectly, Zhongli Zixi rolled out of bed. "Rainy days are like this. I'll heat some water to give you a warm compress; it will help a lot."
Having endured the pain for so many days, Ye Jun’s reactions had slowed. He didn't even manage to react before letting his master go. He lay there in a daze for a moment before suddenly jolting awake: *Wait, how can I let the Young Master serve me?*
Ye Jun got out of bed, struggling to straighten his back as he felt his way along the wall toward the door. He had only gone a few steps when he caught up to his master, who was limping toward the kitchen with the aid of a cane.
It had taken him so long just to cover that tiny distance.
Ye Jun suddenly realized just how inconvenient his master's limbs were now, and a sudden ache bloomed in his heart.
"Young Master," Ye Jun called out.
Ye Jun’s footsteps were habitually silent; the sudden sound in the quiet of the night startled Zhongli Zixi, causing his foot to slip. Ye Jun reached out, catching him gently by the waist to steady him, and then instinctively pulled him into his embrace.
Colliding with his chest, Zhongli Zixi immediately grew tense. "Did I hit your wound? Are you alright?"
Ye Jun did not answer the question. He only asked in a low voice, "Young Master... does it not hurt for you?"
"What?" Zhongli Zixi asked, confused.
Zhongli Zixi was only wearing a thin, light inner robe. As Ye Jun held him, his hand gently stroked the man's back, where he could clearly feel the crisscrossing scars beneath the fabric. These scars were left behind from the ten years the Young Master had spent in Wangsheng Hall, covering almost every form of torture known to man. From childhood to his coming-of-age—years that should have been the most carefree for others—his Young Master had spent them enduring various agonies.
Ye Jun still remembered the most shocking sight: the scar that ran in a full circle around the Young Master's face, where the skin had been cut and sewn back together. That had happened simply because Chu Yan, the daughter of the Lord of the Second Hall of Wangsheng Hall, Lord Chujiang, had casually praised his beauty. Lord Chujiang had accused him of seducing his superior and ordered his face to be flayed. It was only thanks to Chu Yan’s desperate pleading that he had narrowly escaped that fate.
And when he finally crawled out of that mire, paying a massive price to ascend to a high position, reaching the point where he was but a step away from ruling the Central Plains—he had been senselessly pushed into the abyss by the only person he held dear in his heart.
Ye Jun squeezed his fingers, tracing his way up. The fingers peeking out from the sleeves looked normal enough, if a bit pale. But from the palm to the wrist, the bones inside had been crushed to powder and then allowed to heal haphazardly. Now they were deformed and ugly, a sight that would strike fear into anyone who saw them.
That was his vital right hand—the hand that had once held a sword, the hand that had written running script more beautiful than anyone else's.
Ye Jun did not dare imagine how much suffering he had endured, nor did he understand how he had survived it all.
*My Young Master, perhaps you truly do not feel resentment, or hatred, or rage, or madness.*
*But do you truly not feel pain?*
Ye Jun’s grip on Zhongli Zixi’s waist tightened. He buried his head in the crook of the man's neck, his other hand gently covering the Young Master's right wrist, enveloping that unsightly scar. "Young Master, here... does it not hurt?"
Zhongli Zixi knew what he was referring to and smiled faintly. "How could it not hurt?"
These scars, both healed and unhealed, were pains that reached the bone and tore at the soul. How could one ever get used to them?
He added in a low voice, "But what does this bit of pain matter?"
Ye Jun held the Young Master’s thin frame in silence, realizing for the first time how powerless and helpless he truly was.
Zhongli Zixi gently patted his head, as if Ye Jun were the one who needed comforting.
"Ye Jun," Zhongli Zixi said, sounding a bit apprehensive. He couldn't help but ask the question that had become a knot in his heart. "You realized long ago that my brother had abandoned and betrayed me, didn't you? Back then... what were you thinking?"
Without hesitation, Ye Jun replied, "I was thinking: 'If only it were me.'"
Zhongli Zixi froze.
Buried in his master's neck, Ye Jun said in a muffled voice, "If only the most important place in your heart wasn't held by the Eldest Young Master, but by me. If only a tiny bit of that tenderness could be given to me. If it were me, you would never have had to suffer these hardships. It is only a pity that I met you too late, and that you happen to be such a devoted person."
Zhongli Zixi remained silent for a long time.
A shadow guard should have been used to endless waiting, yet Ye Jun suddenly did not want to wait any longer. "Young Master?"
"...Yes, I understood long ago. He is my weakness, and you are my armor." Zhongli Zixi raised his arms to return Ye Jun’s embrace, asking solemnly, "If I had no weakness, and only armor... would I... never have to be hurt again?"
Ye Jun snapped his head up, his face full of pleasant surprise. "Eh? Young Master, was that a confession?"
"..." Zhongli Zixi felt a flash of irritation. *Couldn't you just agree? Why must you spell it out?* He argued, "Clearly, you were the one who confessed first."
"I was talking about the matter of loyalty. Where has your mind wandered?" Ye Jun wore a look of cunning, wicked amusement as he leaned in to press the issue. "So, you really were confessing?"
How could Zhongli Zixi easily bow his head? "Of course not!"
Ye Jun sighed and sniffled. "Alas, it was just my wishful thinking. I also feel that the Young Master definitely doesn't like me. In the future, I should certainly stay far away from you."
"..." Zhongli Zixi suppressed ten thousand curses in his heart and gritted his teeth. "Fine, let's call it a confession! If you're unwilling... then I've lost too much face; you should just kill yourself. I'll just take Ze Que in as my new guard. I'm sure he'd be very happy."
Ye Jun’s smile vanished. "Young Master, what is wrong with you? How could you insert another man's name into your confession? Are you trying to provoke me on purpose?"
Zhongli Zixi looked perfectly innocent. It was Ye Jun’s fault for always wearing that effortless, smiling face; seeing it too much always made Zixi feel like he was being played. Having recently discovered that Ye Jun was incredibly petty regarding Ze Que, it would be a waste not to make use of it.
Unexpectedly, the results were excellent. He would have to do it again next time.
Ye Jun thought indignantly that this Ze Que person was truly an obstacle. Why hadn't that idiot Eldest Young Master come to pick up this moron yet?
Tomorrow, he would just tie him in a bundle and ship him off.
***
Enjoying the story? Rate this novel:
Fatal to Pretend With a Cheat | Chapter 94 | Armor and Weakness | Novela.app | Novela.app
