In the afternoon, the small excursion group headed to the Endless Marine Biological Museum in the city center.
The design of this biological exhibition hall was fascinating. Standing 220 meters tall, it was a scaled-down version of the ocean at a 1:50 ratio—one meter of height corresponded to fifty meters of depth. Thus, 220 meters represented a depth of 11,000 meters. Furthermore, the water pressure, temperature, and natural environment behind the glass were regulated according to the corresponding oceanic zones. Consequently, marine life from various depths would migrate to and inhabit their respective "territories" within the column.
Tickets were somewhat expensive at 2,500 Red Credits each, but every visitor received a "commentary wand." If one encountered a creature they wished to learn about, they simply had to sweep the light emitted by the wand over the organism, and a detailed text description would appear on the Xie-energy tablet in their hand.
Most of the Abyssals swam toward the display areas above 500 meters, but Fanli and her companions lingered in the deep-sea zones. The space was vast, allowing them to wander comfortably.
Fanli felt it was time to adjust her mood.
"Let me tell you about a very interesting phenomenon." Looking at the dazzling, glowing, basket-like treefish before her, she pointed behind the glass. "Suppose the water temperature here is 18 degrees Celsius. If you put your tails in for sixty seconds, how would you feel?"
The marine forms of the Sea Race felt discomfort at temperatures exceeding 15 degrees. If the water was heated above that point without them transforming into land-dwellers, they would feel as miserable as if they were being roasted by fire. Accordingly, the faces of her three friends twisted in distaste.
"Give me ten thousand Fu, and I might consider it," Shasha said expressionlessly.
"Little Pu would accept for just one thousand Red Credits!" the young Pu, situated on Mrs. Pu’s abdomen, said with bright eyes.
"Next question: If after those sixty seconds, the temperature is lowered to 16 degrees and you are asked to stay for another thirty seconds, how would you feel?"
"The feeling would be that ten-star pain becomes nine-star pain," Hage replied.
"So here is the question: One scenario is soaking for 60 seconds at 18 degrees. The other is 60 seconds at 18 degrees plus 30 seconds at 16 degrees. Which would you choose?"
"The 60 seconds at 18 degrees, obviously. Is that a trick question? Who would volunteer for an extra thirty seconds of suffering?"
"But a researcher once had twenty subjects try both sets of experiments without telling them the temperatures or durations," Fanli said. "When asked which they would choose to repeat, seventeen of them chose the 60 seconds at 18 degrees plus the 30 seconds at 16 degrees. Interesting, isn't it?"
"Eh? Why?"
"Take a guess."
Both girls looked puzzled.
"Is it because the 'experiencing self' has no memory?" Yujin asked.
The experiencing self has no memory; the "narrating self" does. The narrating self does not sum up all experiences but rather takes the average experience, regardless of duration. Because the average temperature of the second experiment was lower, the narrating self produced the illusion that the second experiment was less painful.
"Yujin is the clever one after all," Fanli said, her eyes curving into a smile. "We can use this phenomenon to scientifically explain why many women are willing to have a second child—after childbirth, the body automatically secretes cortisol that induces happiness, causing them to forget that the pain of labor was actually far more intense than their memory suggests. In reality, giving birth is probably as painful as the destruction of the world."
"Whoa, stop, I’m developing a phobia of childbirth," Hage shivered.
"I have it worse; I’m developing a phobia of marriage," Shasha’s face turned pale as well.
Seeing their terrified expressions, Fanli found it quite amusing, deriving a bit of joy from teasing her companions.
"You young people are too delicate." Mrs. Pu shook her head, looking down at Little Pu with a fierce face that now radiated happiness. "If you are with the one you love, having a child is nothing."
Once the five of them finished studying the long-jawed dreamfish, the two girls and Mrs. Pu swam upward to visit the marine life of the Twilight Zone. Yujin whispered in Fanli’s ear, "Actually, when you mentioned that experiment on self-differentiation, you were originally trying to explain another phenomenon, weren't you? That when the damage caused by a breakup is too great, it makes a couple forget they were once happy, leaving behind only years of sorrow."
Fanli looked up at him, stunned.
"After all these years, Sister Fanli really hasn't changed at all. Every time you feel sad, you try to use science to convince yourself and alleviate your pain. But you are a girl; even if you show vulnerability, it doesn't matter."
"Yujin, this mind-reading of yours is truly scarier than a ghost story." Fanli shivered just like Hage had.
"After all, Sister Fanli isn't the only one who topped the exams," Yujin laughed.
She had indeed been thinking exactly that. She felt that every time she saw something related to Su Shiye, she felt such pain because the way they had parted was too violent. An overly violent breakup creates indelible trauma in the memory, which relates to the biological difference between the "experiencing self" and the "narrating self."
If Su Shiye had simply disappeared back then, it likely wouldn't have left so many lingering side effects.
All that talk was truly just her convincing herself: *Your pain stems from reasons science can explain.*
"Brother Xinghai has passed away, hasn't he?"
Hearing this, Fanli was startled once more. "Why mention Xinghai?"
"Because in my eyes, although Sister Fanli has been married more than once, the only person you have truly loved seems to be Brother Xinghai. Since you two parted, I have never again seen that light in your eyes that appeared when you looked at him."
"Is that so..." Fanli’s expression dimmed. "Is it that obvious?"
At that moment, a round, orange, deep-sea mutant octopus swam past them. It was roughly the size of a volleyball, with ears as large as Dumbo's. It was exceptionally strong and could traverse the Great Canyon, but it didn't realize the exhibited creatures were separated by glass. It charged straight ahead, slammed into the pane, fell to the ground, then quickly scrambled up and fled in a panic. Yujin, feeling playful, chased after it for a distance while saying, "Yes. Every time I see you missing him like this, my feelings are conflicted. On one hand, I'm moved by your devotion; on the other, I feel it's too cruel for you. So, I want to say, hundreds of years have passed. No matter what happened back then, you can let it go a little and look out for your next true love."
"True love?"
"Exactly. Don't tell me the Moer CEO is your true love. Your age gap is so large, you aren't even from the same era—how could there be any passion?"
"Then what do you think counts as true love?" Fanli followed him and poked the "Little Dumbo," sending it scurrying away. "I feel like I lost the ability to love a long time ago."
"Someone who makes you happy, someone similar to you. Although many say love is about opposites attracting, from a psychological perspective, two similar people are more harmonious together. If you don't mind, once we return to Saint Yagana, I can accompany you to the schools to look. Just like when you met Brother Xinghai at school, perhaps you'll meet your next 'destined one' there."
"Alright."
"Then, as a reward, I don't ask for much—just that Sister Fanli sings a song for me. Everyone who has heard your voice says it is like rose incense; don't let it go to waste."
"Singing?" Fanli frowned. "But having a pleasant speaking voice and being a good singer are two different things. I'm tone-deaf."
"I know. If you were good at it, where would the fun be?"
"..." *Yujin, you were so cute as a child; how did you grow up to be such a dog?*
After the three-day trip ended, Fanli became busy again, throwing herself into her new work environment. It had to be said that the difference between the Dark Sea and the Light Sea in the field of magic potions was vast. Their research involved a large number of chemosynthetic bacteria. Some bacteria came from scavengers—after they consumed a carcass, the bones could decompose chemosynthetic bacteria rich in sulfides. Some were chemosynthetic bacteria from hydrogen sulfide-fixing trench worms, and others were from methane-fixing mussels—primarily produced at the Longcheng Cold Seep under the Meteorite Trench, far from Baman Boya...
Fanli maintained a strong interest and sense of awe toward her new work. Furthermore, because her mind had been on politics and economics for the past few hundred years, her research level in the Light Sea had remained stagnant. Now, finding new inspiration in the Dark Sea, she read hungrily every day. After a while, she managed to dissolve the terrible mood of her "breakup."
After the Great Oracle arrived in the Abyssal Empire, the Imperial Prime Minister became the chief negotiator for the Abyssals, meeting once again with the Light Sea representatives. They decided to jointly uphold the consensus of total oceanic peace and maintain the tranquility of the Storm Well and the Twilight Zone.
This was the year 320 of the Radiant Era of the Light Sea, and the year 421 of the Red Moon Era of the Abyss—the most harmonious year in the history of the Light and Dark Seas.
November 9th was the seventieth birthday of the Red Moon Princess, Su Li. The entire Abyssal Empire celebrated this lovely angel.
Su Shiye set the location for his daughter's birthday celebration at the Temple of Memories in the deepest part of the Endless Ocean.
The original designer of the Temple of Memories was the Ethereal Lord. When Su Shiye first obtained his Ethereal Body, he gained part of the Ethereal Lord's memories, including the framework of the Temple of Memories buried deep within. He drew the architecture and had the great architects of the White-spotted Pufferfish tribe from the civilized Light Sea rebuild an identical palace—the one that now sat in the Storm Well. Beneath the Wind-Moving Temple in Luoya, there was also an arcane phantom of the Temple of Memories' interior. Beyond that, many architects across various seas had been seduced by the temple's style, creating all sorts of imitations.
But no one in the Light Sea knew the true location of the Temple of Memories.
In fact, this one, located at the deepest point of the Endless Ocean, was the real Temple of Memories. It had long since sunk into the most secret corner of the ocean's heart over the course of 430 million years.
Fanli arrived at the Temple of Memories with Yujin, Hage, and Shasha, and was stunned by its magnificent exterior. It was four or five times larger than the imitation in the Storm Well. Refined by time, it stood amidst the undersea mountains, almost merging with the continuous range. The three sub-temples were integrated into one, resembling a giant mountain of glass—a blend of marble, stained glass, mosaics, and Xie-energy lamps. Ships from various civilizations and kingdoms of the ocean sped toward it; guests swam out of them and into the temple, appearing as tiny as swarming ants.
Fanli was reminded of the Emerald Mountains of Saint Yagana.
The Emerald Mountains were ruins of the Deep Blue; the Temple of Memories was a ruin of the Ethereal Lord. It had to be said that the power of the two ancient gods was formidable, creating such massive structures by their strength alone.
During the Age of Life, the Ethereal Lord created the Amber Dream within the Temple of Memories.
Starting 430 million years ago, the Ethereal Lord stayed here for a hundred million years, immersed in memories whose details were known to no one. During the ages he locked himself in the temple, the consciousness of the Glass Legion built Saint Yagana and guarded it, turning it into the first civilized city among primitive cultures. The Ancient Sea Language was born; the Eternal Square took its initial shape; the Carcharodon sharks went extinct; fish in the sea evolved lungs, and some walked onto land. Starting from Justitia, the seven Pillar Gods were born one after another within a week to guard their respective seas. On the eighth day, the ocean turned crimson overnight and returned to normal the next day; the Sea Race marked the birth of this "Burning Sea" as the symbol of the end of the Pillar Gods' birth... But in the end, he too abandoned his divine consciousness and physical form, returning his soul to the universe, choosing the same end as Deep Blue.
However, the Ethereal Lord's Temple of Memories remained, and the Amber Dream he created remained.
Upon entering the Amber Dream, the gathering of a large amount of Xie-energy could make memories reappear vividly, as if one were experiencing them all over again. Here, everyone could awaken the most unforgettable and beautiful memories from the depths of their hearts.
"Let's go play in the Amber Dream!" Seeing the crowd surging at the entrance of the East Wing, Hage eagerly tugged at Fanli and Shasha. "Go, go, go!"
Fanli followed them to the entrance of the side hall. It appeared as a milky-yellow mist. More than half of the guests were standing still, talking to the empty seawater or smiling. This phenomenon of collective sleepwalking amused her. After the other three went in, she simply stayed at the entrance to watch.
In just ten minutes, she saw old acquaintances: Kunti, Xiami, and Lina.
Kunti and Xiami had both entered memories involving Alan. However, Kunti saw the Alan from their engagement, while Xiami saw the Alan who had turned to her for help after betraying Kunti.
Lina entered a childhood memory shared with her parents.
Hage entered a memory of her carefree youth with her best friends before university.
Shasha entered a childhood memory of leaning against her late mother's knees.
And Yujin was the sweetest child, entering only the most beautiful memories filled with a sense of security.
Because the images in the memories frequently caused interference, all the guests were walking and stopping intermittently. Only one person walked out from the interior of the palace, completely unaffected throughout.
That was the current master of the palace, the Red Moon Emperor, Su Shiye.
Having entered the Amber Dream too many times, those parts of the past etched in Su Shiye's memory had long since become commonplace.
Accepting the impact and recurrence of memories time and again, he remained expressionless, possessing even a hint of resigned indifference. Seeing Fanli, he lifted his eyelashes, which looked as if they were dusted with snow. "What is the Great Oracle Su Yi doing there? If you don't want to enter the Amber Dream, you can come in through the main entrance."
They hadn't been in contact since their last argument. Seeing him again now, her feelings were indescribably complex.
"No, I'm just looking around casually." Fanli nodded to him and slowly swam inside.
To ensure that Sea Race members of all physical structures could adapt to the environment, there were air sacs for protection inside the Temple of Memories; everyone entered in their land-dwelling form.
The moment she stepped into the Amber Dream, the surrounding scenery turned black, as if night had fallen. The figures of people became semi-transparent, like arcane phantoms. Glowing white stars connected into a virtual Milky Way, and large snowflakes fell, laying out a winter of time in the dark night.
Memory brought the most important person in her life toward her.
At this moment, the real person became a phantom; the memory outlines, shifting from blurred to clear, became the reality instead.
Fanli entered a very, very long dream, so long it was almost endless. And the male protagonist in the dream, from beginning to end, was only one person.
Lush seagrass grew wildly, and the branches of the forest swayed in the seawater. Squids flashed with bioluminescence, swimming past her or passing through her body. The thin, small figure of young Xinghai swam rapidly ahead of her, pulling the surrounding scenery along with him. Then, he crouched down, picked up a crustacean soaked in the seawater from the ground, and waved at Fanli. "Lili, look, I found it."
This was the past in Feili Town. She remembered; it was a memory of her brother taking her to play in the undersea forest.
She remembered all of this, but after more than six hundred years had hurried by, she had almost forgotten what young Xinghai looked like. His eyes were like hers, blue, but the color was much lighter—she didn't know if it was because his hair color was also light.
"Lili, don't be afraid, I will protect you," young Xinghai said solemnly, puffing out his chest like a man.
"Okay, Brother!!" The young girl's voice seemed to come from her mind and her throat, sounding as if she had said it herself.
The scene shifted. Young Xinghai lay on the bed with his back to her, his silver-gray hair scattered across the pillow.
"Brother, don't be afraid, Lili is here. No one dares to bully you." A pair of small hands reached out and hugged Xinghai's waist.
"Mm."
Unlike many people who became overly immersed, Fanli knew this was just a memory. Because no matter how the phantoms of Su Shiye appeared before her eyes, the cold, real Su Shiye always stood behind the phantoms. Even if he was semi-transparent, he served as a constant reminder that this was nothing more than an illusion.
One was reality, the other was illusion; they were easy to distinguish.
He didn't love her anymore. She knew.
But she also knew that the person in the memory loved her deeply.
Being in love with the person in the memory was truly wonderful.
Guarding the memories of two people alone was very lonely, but it could also make one stronger.
The scene shifted again.
"Lili, come here, give me your hand." Su Shiye smiled tenderly at her, his snowy hair brushing against his amber earrings as he reached out his hand. "Come, I'll take you to see the undersea forest."
Fanli did not reach out. She was very rational; she stood quietly, looking at him, unmoving. She did not perform any of the strange actions of the guests immersed in their memories.
The Su Shiye opposite her frowned as he looked at her.
What was she seeing?
He only saw Fanli’s eyes bloodshot, turned red by the soaking tears, but she pursed her trembling lips, holding her breath, stubbornly refusing to let a single tear fall.
Forget it. He had known her for so many years; did he not know what she would see? It was nothing more than those victims she regarded as her life's blood, whom he considered insignificant.
The phantom Su Shiye disappeared.
Like a revolving lantern, another phantom Su Shiye appeared before her, kneeling down. "Lili, marry me, okay?"
Fanli couldn't help but wrap her arms tightly around herself, her tears nearly uncontrollable.
At this moment, she was like an iron shipwreck soaked in the deep sea for a thousand years—outwardly appearing massive and stable, but with just a gentle touch, she would instantly collapse into fragments.
The phantom Su Shiye disappeared again, and the teenage Xinghai returned.
Time was a scattered puzzle, pieces fitting together one by one, forming her sweetest, multi-colored teenage years. The youth smiled slightly before her, his white shirt fluttering in the water, his water-blue eyes a clear, transparent bay:
"Lili, where you are is my home."
Then, Xinghai changed into the old-style major's uniform from six hundred years ago, yet he looked brand new.
"I'm dreaming." He reached out his arms and pulled Fanli into an embrace, breathing heavily. "Lili, why am I dreaming again?"
The next was Su Shiye again.
"Silly Lili, you need to rest more." Su Shiye placed her on the bed, his eyes filled with an endless, tender affection. "Wait for me, I'll be right back."
"I love you."
"Lili, it's my fault. It's not that this world is bad, and certainly not that your ideals are bad. Let me go, but don't give up on everything you believe in..."
In this heartbreaking, black galaxy of stars, the figures weaving in and out were all him—only him.
Finally, she couldn't take it anymore.
Even if it was just a memory, she couldn't let Su Shiye confess unilaterally without giving any response. So, she covered her mouth with her hand, her lips merely moving, making almost no sound: "Take me away..."
Su Shiye couldn't hear what she was saying. He could only see two straight lines of tears sliding from her eyes, breaking over the back of her hand, and quickly flowing down.
Su Shiye’s eyes widened in shock. His body stiffened for two seconds, and he took a step toward her.
"Sister Fanli?" At that moment, Yujin patted Fanli’s shoulder, saying worriedly, "What's wrong? Why are you crying?"
Fanli looked at him, then glanced at the Su Shiye who was smiling tenderly at her, but ultimately her gaze met the real Su Shiye's eyes.
What was the use of dreaming any longer?
He didn't love her anymore.
That was the truth. No matter how many years she spent trying to forget, he would never disappear from her life. However, all of this was entirely in the past.
"Yujin, just for a little while."
She suddenly grabbed Yujin’s waist, buried her head in his chest, and began to weep silently and bitterly.
"Okay. Okay." Yujin was at a loss, only able to carefully return her embrace. "As long as you need. I'm always here."
The Xie-energy lanterns emitted a soft golden light, highlighting Su Shiye’s white hair and half of his sharply defined profile.
He glanced at the Great Oracle Su Yi crying in another man's arms, then looked at the phantom Lili before him, who was smiling sweetly and saying, "I only love Brother, too." He gave a numb smile, finding it all incredibly tedious.
Su Shiye turned and walked out of the Amber Dream.
***
| Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation |
| :--- | :--- | :--- |
| 无尽海洋生物馆 | Endless Marine Biological Museum | A massive museum in the Abyss representing ocean depths. |
| 解说杆 | Commentary wand | A device used to get information on creatures in the museum. |
| 邪能白板 | Xie-energy tablet | A display device powered by Xie-energy. |
| 体验自我 | Experiencing self | Psychological term for the self that lives through moments. |
| 叙事自我 | Narrating self | Psychological term for the self that remembers and tells stories. |
| 长颌梦鱼 | Long-jawed dreamfish | A fictional or specific deep-sea fish species. |
| 黄昏区 | Twilight Zone | The mesopelagic zone of the ocean (200m to 1000m). |
| 小飞象 | Little Dumbo | Referring to the Dumbo Octopus (Grimpoteuthis). |
| 龙城冷泉口 | Longcheng Cold Seep | A specific geological/biological site in the deep sea. |
| 陨星海沟 | Meteorite Trench | A deep-sea trench in the novel's geography. |
| 耀光时代 | Radiant Era | The current era/calendar of the Light Sea. |
| 赤月纪 | Red Moon Era | The current era/calendar of the Abyss. |
| 苏璃 | Su Li | The daughter of Su Shiye and Gexi. |
| 回忆神殿 | Temple of Memories | An ancient structure built by the Ethereal Lord. |
| 以太之主 | Ethereal Lord | An ancient god-like figure in the novel's lore. |
| 琥珀梦境 | Amber Dream | A phenomenon/place within the temple that recreates memories. |
| 琉璃军团 | Glass Legion | A force or group associated with the Ethereal Lord. |
| 永恒广场 | Eternal Square | A landmark in Saint Yagana. |
| 裂口鲨 | Carcharodon sharks | Likely referring to an extinct or specific shark species. |
| 加斯蒂琪雅 | Justitia | One of the seven Pillar Gods. |
| 燃烧之海 | Burning Sea | A legendary event in the world's creation myth. |
Enjoying the story? Rate this novel:
Her 4.3 Billion Years | Chapter 99 | Echoes of the Amber Dream | Novela.app | Novela.app