Golden September should have been a beautiful season.
However, the sharp-edged young man of Xi’an Street—who had let himself run wild and expanded his territory ever since finishing high school—was currently shrouded in gloom. He was so distracted that he even lost focus during negotiations.
Li Zhenting sat with Liu Yan in a frequently visited restaurant. Not a single dish sat upon the table; there were only two cups of tea that had long since gone cold. The cup across from him had been sipped once and then left untouched.
“I’ve said it before: from Shop 93 to Xi’nan Street, there is no way we’re handing this area over to you. Li Zhenting, don’t push your luck.”
Sitting opposite him was another former top lieutenant of Brother Qiang. Since Brother Qiang’s imprisonment, this man had been at constant odds with Li Zhenting, fighting him for every inch of territory.
“Who manages it isn’t for you to decide.”
Li Zhenting was staring at the scenery outside the window. Something had caught his eye, leaving him completely unresponsive to the other man’s posturing.
Instead, it was Liu Yan who crossed his arms, his face full of disdain.
With a loud *clatter*, the teacup was finally overturned, ending its neglected life. The man who knocked it over slammed the table and stood up in a rage, pointing a finger at Li Zhenting’s nose. “Fine! It seems you aren’t going to give me any face at all. Just you wait and see who the real boss around here is!”
He glared fiercely at Li Zhenting, yet still received no reaction.
Seeing this, Liu Yan secretly placed a hand on his boss’s shoulder and squeezed slightly. “Heh, you’re so tough. We’re just terrified.”
*Brother, say something!*
The atmosphere remained at a stalemate. After an indeterminate amount of time, a burst of light music drifted in from outside—it was the dismissal bell for the City’s First Key High School.
Li Zhenting, who had been staring outside the whole time, finally moved. His eyes flickered with impatience as he glanced at the two ashen-faced men across from him and stood up.
“What... what are you doing? You want to fight?” The man instinctively took a step back.
“Just wait and see, then.”
Li Zhenting merely grabbed his jacket and walked straight past the two of them, leaving only those words behind.
*Great, looks like we’re going to have to trade blows again.*
Liu Yan massaged his forehead helplessly. Although they weren’t afraid of a fight, why waste the effort on something that could be resolved peacefully?
Ever since Li Zi started high school, his big brother’s temper had become increasingly unpredictable. Li Zi’s academic pressure was heavy, her free time was dwindling, and she had signed up for evening self-study sessions. Even on weekends, she spent most of her time in tutoring. Outsiders like them were lucky to see her once a month.
This was even harder on Li Zhenting, who used to be glued to her side every day. He had treated picking her up from school, walking her dog, and secretly watching her from beneath her wall as his spiritual sustenance—his emotional stabilizer, the very source of his soul’s comfort.
Yet, months ago, without any warning, he was forced to lose all of it. He had entered a long, passive, and bewildered period of withdrawal.
What Liu Yan didn’t know was that it wasn't just the lack of meetings that made Li Zhenting lose his soul; it was the shift in Li Zi’s attitude.
***
“You don’t need to pick me up anymore.”
That morning, before Li Zi stepped through the school gates, she suddenly spoke to Li Zhenting.
Li Zhenting was in the middle of helping her take her backpack off the motorcycle, secretly stuffing a bottle of milk inside. He froze at her words.
“Why? Is your family back? Are they picking you up tonight?”
Li Zi looked calmly into his eyes—eyes that others saw only as fierce, but which now gazed at her with a hint of confusion and unease, like a puppy suddenly abandoned by its owner.
“No. I mean you don’t need to come anymore, ever.”
“The family driver will take me.”
She reached out, intending to take her backpack.
“...Why?”
Li Zhenting’s voice cracked slightly. Though the height of summer had not yet passed, a chill surged into his heart, forming rolling thunderclouds poised to strike.
He wanted to ask so many things. Why suddenly stop him? Had he done something wrong to make her angry? Had he been unpunctual lately and wasted her time? Or was it the milk? Li Zi didn’t like drinking milk, but he always snuck it in—had he finally annoyed her?
Li Zhenting was clumsy with words. His exploding emotions traveled through his throat only to emerge as a raspy: “I’ll wait for you.”
Li Zi tugged at her backpack, but it didn't budge. The veins on the hand gripping the bag were bulging—a stiffness the owner wasn't even aware of.
She didn't try to snatch the bag away. She simply looked up at Li Zhenting again and said, “I’ll be busy from now on. My school hours will be irregular. I don’t want to trouble you. You should focus on your own business too. Liu Yan has been waiting for you across the street for a long time.”
“Give me the bag. The bell is about to ring.”
Just the night before, the two of them had been walking the dog in the park. They had even ended up lying on the grass, shoulders touching, their breathing so close as they quietly watched the stars together.
When they said goodbye that night, Li Zi had even smiled at him. His heart had been floating lightly in the air all the way home.
Yet in a single night, her eyes had returned to nothing but cold indifference.
He didn't understand.
“...” Li Zhenting stared at her blankly, as if he hadn't heard a word.
As the start of class drew nearer, the crowd at the school gate grew. Li Zi was a well-known top student, and the number of people glancing at the two of them was particularly high.
He wasn't sure if it was an illusion, but Li Zhenting thought he heard a sigh. Then, the object he had been gripping so tightly was suddenly pulled away, leaving only a trace of dull pain spreading across his palm.
“Goodbye.”
Li Zi spoke softly, then walked through the white school gates without looking back.
Li Zhenting watched her figure disappear mechanically before turning to walk toward Liu Yan, who had been waiting.
“Brother, what’s wrong? Why are your eyes so red?”
*I don’t know.*
*I don’t know either.*
***
“Miss, he’s following behind again.”
The driver glanced at the rearview mirror. That familiar motorcycle was trailing the car at a steady distance.
This was already the countless time in several months. He couldn't help but feel a sense of admiration for the other man’s tireless spirit.
“I know. Ignore him. Drive slower.”
The girl in the car, dressed in a crisp school uniform, glanced back. A trace of weariness finally surfaced between her cold brows.
She reached up to pinch the bridge of her nose, as if she could suppress the surging emotions in her heart that way.
Li Zi knew her susceptibility period was approaching. The timing was completely different from the hospital’s estimates. She didn't know why, but in her past life, her susceptibility period had also occurred nearly a year earlier than her peers. It had been an unexpected eruption, happening while her family was away busy with their own affairs.
That susceptibility period had been chaotic. The person who had endured it with her had nearly lost half his life.
In this life, she was the only one who knew the exact timing. For some reason, she hadn't breathed a word of it to anyone.
As the period drew near, various negative emotions invaded her mind day and night. Memories of her past life replayed in her nightmares, tossing and turning.
She had always been good at suppressing her emotions. Even when she was so exhausted she had nearly collapsed on the grass, she hadn't let Li Zhenting sense a thing.
That night, she had been enduring a buzzing tinnitus in her head when the man’s voice drifted over, trying to sound natural.
“The weather is nice today.”
“The environmental management in our city has been great these past few years. You can see so many stars.”
“Cough... I saw a lot of people online saying you can only see a night sky like this in the countryside.”
“The moon is beautiful tonight.”
At those stilted, rehearsed lines, the corners of Li Zi’s mouth curled up. She raised a hand to cover her eyes.
What kind of nonsense had Li Zhenting been reading online again?
She opened her eyes, wanting to look at the night sky he praised so much, but the sharp tinnitus suddenly transformed into the wailing of countless people: “Brother, wake up!”
“Who was it that hurt you?!”
An ominous blood-red color spread across her vision.
Her expression froze.
“What’s wrong? Are you unwell?”
Perhaps because she hadn't responded for a long time, Li Zhenting touched her tentatively, his voice full of concern.
“...It’s nothing.”
Li Zi answered softly. Her eyes lost focus as she looked in the direction Li Zhenting wanted her to see.
“It’s nothing.”
That night, Li Zhenting—immersed in the secret joy of a confession he thought had gone unnoticed—truly hadn't noticed anything. He only saw the now-mature girl offer him a gentle smile under the streetlights when he walked her home.
He didn't know what that smile represented, nor did he know what would happen the next day. He simply walked through the empty alleys, his steps light with a hidden excitement.
But Li Zi had quietly decided to distance herself from him.
***
Li Zi wondered if she simply couldn't take another step forward.
She had already failed miserably in her childhood plan to stay away from Li Zhenting, shifting instead to protecting him and guiding him away from that dangerous world. Though she had seen results, she hadn't fully achieved her goal.
Now, Li Zhenting’s feelings for her were becoming impossible to hide. If she took this step, or allowed him to take it...
Would everything spiral toward the tragedy of their past life again?
After all, in her heart, she understood perfectly.
The direct cause of Li Zhenting’s death appeared to be that murderer, but in reality, it was she who had pushed him toward that end.
Li Zhenting could have lived a freer, happier life. If he became entangled with her again, would he once more become that corpse—the one who had no sense of security and had battered himself bloody in the world of love?
*I think... I cannot be that cruel.*
Li Zi locked the faint voice of protest in her heart into a dark corner.
*We cannot go any further.*
*But why are you always so foolish? Why do you keep chasing after me no matter how coldly I speak?*
*Aren't you afraid of the pain? Aren't you afraid of heartbreak?*
She looked at the motorcycle following closely outside the car window. Beneath the privacy film, she touched the glass, right where Li Zhenting’s neck would be.
*Stop trying to sway me.*
***
| Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation |
| :--- | :--- | :--- |
| 易感期 | Susceptibility Period | In ABO settings, the period when an Alpha becomes emotionally unstable and physically needy (similar to a rut). |
| 希安街 | Xi’an Street | A location mentioned in the story. |
| 希南街 | Xi’nan Street | A location mentioned in the story. |
| 柳衍 | Liu Yan | Li Zhenting's subordinate/friend. |
| 强哥 | Brother Qiang | A former gang leader mentioned in previous context. |
| 今晚夜色真美啊 | The moon is beautiful tonight | A famous literary trope (originally from Natsume Soseki) used as a poetic way to say "I love you." |
