I had never been to a place like this before, and I couldn't help but feel a sense of trepidation. I had expected to see scenes like those in movies or TV shows, but the bar turned out to be quite normal. There was no pitch-black dance floor or swarms of people flitting about like butterflies. It was just a bar counter, pool tables, and booths. If I hadn't known it was a gay bar, I would have taken it for any ordinary establishment.
Afraid of being spotted if I got too close, I sat down in a corner booth. My backside had barely touched the seat when someone pressed a hand onto my shoulder, giving me a massive fright.
The man who tapped me was equally startled by my reaction. "Whoa, talk about a jumpy one!"
I looked up at the sound of that rather feminine voice. The guy was wearing a mock-layered vest over a shirt. He was quite clean-cut, though there was a certain campiness in the way his eyes and brows moved. I felt a surge of nerves; this was the first time I’d ever been hit on by a "fellow traveler." How was I supposed to respond?
"Little Vest" smiled as he sized me up. "Mind if I sit?"
"Uh, I..." I wasn't sure how to handle the situation. I just wanted to tell him I was meeting someone.
He cut me off. "You followed someone in, didn't you?" He sat down without waiting for an answer and glanced toward the bar. "Is it him?"
I was speechless. Was this my "Senior Brother in the Gay Arts"? I wondered if I’d eventually develop that kind of intuition if I practiced enough.
A waiter came over. I asked if they had Coke, but Little Vest ordered a cocktail for me instead, saying it was his treat.
I didn't want him thinking my "virtue" was up for sale, so I quickly fished out my wallet and pulled out all the cash inside. "Is this enough?" I asked.
Little Vest laughed at me. "Fine, fine. If you want to pay, go ahead." He leaned in. "I noticed you the moment you walked through the door. Don't be so tense. I just thought you were my type and wanted to make a friend. If we hit it off, maybe we could see where it goes. I’m not into one-night stands."
I wiped the sweat from my brow and nodded frantically. My eyes remained glued to Ling Xiao at the bar. Every time he glanced in my direction, I ducked my head. Little Vest seemed to understand perfectly; he immediately straightened his back to block Ling Xiao’s line of sight. Seeing such a slender, feminine guy puffing out his chest like that was actually a bit comical. Although Ling Xiao had ordered a drink, he wasn't really drinking it. He kept checking his phone for the time, looking like he was waiting for someone.
Little Vest glanced back at Ling Xiao. "Is he your friend?"
I took a sip of the exorbitantly expensive cocktail. "Teammate."
Little Vest looked surprised, his voice pitching higher. "You’re a fencer too?"
"Huh?" I was even more surprised. "You know him?"
"I don't know his name, but..." He narrowed his eyes and gestured behind me. "The person he’s waiting for is here."
I turned around. A man of average height walked in, scanned the bar, and headed straight for Ling Xiao. I was stunned. This man was nothing special in terms of looks or physique—he was slightly pudgy with a bloated face. He wasn't even as cute as Little Vest! What was wrong with Ling Xiao’s taste?
The man spoke to Ling Xiao. I tried to decipher Ling Xiao’s expression, but he didn't look like he was in love. Then again, it was impossible to imagine that "iceberg face" looking like he was in love. I’d never dated an iceberg before, so for all I knew, Ling Xiao didn't do smiles even when he was dating. However, the way they were communicating felt a bit... secretive. Could it be... a hookup?!
Dammit, no! That would totally ruin his character!
My heart felt like it was being gnawed on by ten thousand ants. I didn't even hear what Little Vest was saying to me, only giving him distracted, perfunctory answers.
Finally, Ling Xiao nodded. The man tried to pay the bill, but Ling Xiao blocked his hand and paid it himself. Then, the two of them left one after the other.
My heart took flight right then and there—and my brain went with it. I couldn't stop thinking the worst. The more I looked at them, the more it looked like a hookup. I’d never hooked up with anyone, but this was exactly how I imagined it would go. My world was crumbling, yet I tried to comfort myself: *A hookup is fine. At least it’s not a relationship. I can stop a hookup, but I can't do anything about a relationship.*
I was about to chase after them when I heard Little Vest ask, "Do you know who that man is?"
I stopped. "You know him?"
"Of course," Little Vest said, propping his chin on his hand mysteriously. "That guy is bad news..."
Hearing that, I bolted out the door. Little Vest called out behind me in a dainty voice, "I don't even have your number yet!" I shouted my phone number back at him as I sprinted away.
The moment I exited the bar, I saw the man getting into a Buick. I yelled "Wait!" and gave chase, but the car started up quickly. Fortunately, the street wasn't wide and was lined with parked cars, so the Buick couldn't pick up much speed. I pushed myself to the limit, telling myself that for the sake of our bond as teammates, I couldn't just leave him to his fate.
I sprinted for two hundred meters. Just as I was crossing the road, a sudden cramp hit my leg, and I wiped out hard. I knelt on the asphalt, watching in defeat as the Buick’s taillights faded into the distance. Just as I was wallowing in frustration, I felt a cold draft on the back of my neck. A heavy sense of pressure loomed behind me. Thinking some drunk driver was about to run me over, I tucked my head and rolled—
I rolled to the side of the road, but no car passed by. I looked back to see a bicycle braked right behind me under the streetlamp. Ling Xiao stood there, one long leg braced against the ground. He looked down at me and asked:
"What are you doing here?"
The way he sat on that bike with one foot down, silhouetted against the pale streetlights, was incredibly swoon-worthy. His signature deep, resonant voice felt strangely comforting in that moment. My brain stalled. I looked at the direction the Buick had gone, then up at the towering Ling Xiao, finally regaining a shred of my lost sanity.
My response was surprisingly blunt. I asked him directly, "You didn't get in that guy's car?"
Ling Xiao gave me a complicated look. I felt like a pathetic human cowering before a super-powered AI. He had likely deduced the entire sequence of events already. At this moment, his infrared-like eyes were probably displaying: *Human, Male. Heart rate: 108. Adrenaline: Extreme. Dopamine: Extreme. Conclusion: Loser. Pathetic unrequited lover.*
It felt like, aside from beating him three times in the practice matches, I was always a mess in front of him—a total failure.
"How long are you planning to stay down there?" Ling Xiao asked after twenty seconds.
I scrambled up and brushed the dust off my clothes. "Nothing. It's my right to lie wherever I want."
Ling Xiao narrowed his eyes at me. After a long silence, he said:
"As you can see, I did not get in that man's car."
"Oh," I said, feeling immensely relieved. "So you guys aren't... that?"
"You mean a hookup?"
My face turned beet red. I stammered that I hadn't said that.
Ling Xiao narrowed his eyes further, looking at me with an "I’ve seen right through you, human" expression.
I felt like a rubber ball—I thought I was pretty solid, but one flick from Ling Xiao’s sword had punctured me until only the skin was left. I rubbed my arm and asked, "So, are you busy?"
"Hooking up? No."
That deep voice was full of disdain. Talking to this guy was infuriating. I cleared my throat. "Then... are you heading back to the base?"
"If you're asking if I can give you a ride because you don't have money for a taxi right now, the answer is yes."
I really didn't know how to thank him... and his entire ancestral line!
***
Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation
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小马甲 | Little Vest | A nickname for the man at the bar based on his clothing.
娘气 | Campy / Feminine | Used to describe the effeminate mannerisms of the man at the bar.
基门师兄 | Senior Brother in the Gay Arts | A humorous play on martial arts "sect brothers" (师兄), referring to a more experienced gay man.
约炮 | Hookup / Hooking up | Slang for a casual sexual encounter or one-night stand.
苏炸天 | Swoon-worthy / Heart-meltingly hot | Internet slang (苏) used to describe someone extremely charming or attractive.
低音炮 | Deep, resonant voice | Literally "bass cannon," used to describe a sexy, deep male voice.
衰仔 | Loser / Pathetic guy | A Cantonese-origin term for someone who is unlucky or useless.
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