"So, when will it be?"
This was already the third neighbor to ask.
Xainte, who lived two doors down, had asked Bai Shi the same thing today. He mentioned that his second-quarter business was about to start and he would be leaving soon, so he wanted to have a proper get-together before he left.
These businessmen were like migratory birds, moving with the flow of capital across different seasons, paying exorbitant prices for comfortable nests in various locales. Bai Shi hesitated. His original intention was to wait a bit longer to ensure the surroundings were safe—like an eagle bringing prey back to its nest, checking for other threats before eating.
But it wasn't right to keep stalling.
Inside the house, Pei Cangyu was working on a puzzle with Lasis. As he arranged the pieces, he couldn't help but think: even if he didn't speak the language and his brain wasn't the quickest, surely puzzles were meant for children?
At that thought, he looked up at Lasis, who was sitting cross-legged on the floor drinking beer, her eyes glued to a pop singer on the television.
Pei Cangyu glanced outside and saw Bai Shi talking to someone by the driveway.
He had noticed since he arrived that there were people of all races here. Foreigners weren't all exceptionally tall like he used to imagine, but at 190 centimeters, Bai Shi was considered tall even in this community. Although Bai Shi still stood out in a crowd, he didn't look out of place. One reason was that he kept his hair swept back, fully revealing his features. Because his features were deep-set and his skin was pale, he looked like someone of mixed heritage. Compared to the Germanic people nearby, his facial lines weren't sharp enough; compared to the Latinos, they weren't intense enough; and compared to the Nordics, they weren't striking enough. Yet, the wonder of it was that he existed at a delicate point of balance. He looked like a foreigner who wasn't too distantly related; anyone could claim him as a member of their own race, albeit one of "imperfect" stock. Pei Cangyu wondered if this trait was a blessing or a curse. Bai Shi looked like he could blend in anywhere, but then again, all wanderers seemed to be that way.
Lasis gently patted Pei Cangyu’s arm. When he turned, he saw her meaningful smile. Following his gaze, Lasis spotted Bai Shi.
She said something that Pei Cangyu naturally didn't understand, though she seemed to be talking to herself.
Lasis gestured to Pei Cangyu, seemingly looking for the book she had lent him. Pei Cangyu glanced nervously outside. Seeing that Bai Shi wouldn't be back for a while, he jumped up and rushed to the room. When they had moved the sofa last time, he had been quick enough to hide the book under the bathroom sink. Otherwise, it would be gone by now.
Lately, taking advantage of the times Bai Shi went out to run errands nearby, Pei Cangyu had been hungrily reading the words he couldn't understand. On the last page of this magazine, he had found something resembling a timetable. The most recent date was the 11th, giving him reason to believe it was some kind of schedule. He guessed it might be a train timetable. If so, he needed to know these place names.
Pei Cangyu drew a globe and sketched out several continents, pointing to them one by one in an attempt to determine where he was, starting with the landmasses.
But Lasis kept shaking her head. Pei Cangyu blinked, confused.
A new song started on the TV.
Lasis’s eyes lit up. She looked down at the magazine, found a line of italicized text, and pointed it out to Pei Cangyu. It was in a language he couldn't read. Then, Lasis pointed back at the TV.
Pei Cangyu was utterly lost, staring intently at the screen. After a moment, a block of subtitles appeared in the bottom left corner. Going by instinct, Pei Cangyu guessed it was the song title.
To his surprise, Lasis quickly leaned in, pointed to a line that looked like a title, and said something.
Suddenly, the realization hit Pei Cangyu like a bolt of lightning. This wasn't a train timetable—it was a program guide!
He stood up and asked, "Is it TV? TV?"
Simple words, an ultimate realization.
Lasis replied, "No."
She mimed driving a car with one hand while resting the other on an imaginary window, humming a tune as she turned the "steering wheel."
Pei Cangyu: "Radio!"
Lasis: "Bingo!"
Bai Shi: "What are you talking about?"
Pei Cangyu kicked the magazine under the sofa. His reaction was so fast it left Lasis dumbfounded. However, she only froze for a second before smiling and winking at Pei Cangyu. In her eyes, his act of hiding the magazine was probably no different from her hiding magazines her parents didn't like—it wasn't a big deal.
Pei Cangyu relaxed. Lasis seemed willing to keep his secret.
Lasis smiled at the approaching Bai Shi and said they were playing charades, asking if he wanted to join. Bai Shi shook his head, but he sat down. Before doing so, he specifically grabbed a cushion rather than sitting directly on the floor.
Pei Cangyu shook his head at how fastidious he was. He wanted to mock him, but knew it would be pointless. Lasis watched him as he sat, handing him a can of beer. Seeing Pei Cangyu across from them with his head down, fiddling with the puzzle, Lasis pursed her lips as if making a decision, then turned to Bai Shi.
"Mr. Bai, are you two biological brothers?"
Bai Shi turned to look at her. Lasis’s face was flushed, and her freckles seemed to dance across her skin because of her nervousness.
"Why do you ask?"
—He never gave a straight answer to a straight question.
Lasis suddenly went quiet, looking as though she were brewing a major question, one even she knew she shouldn't ask.
Bai Shi waited for her patiently, watching Pei Cangyu clumsily arrange the puzzle pieces. To be fair, Pei Cangyu had absolutely no talent for this; he was truly bad at mental tasks. He was better suited for a job on a scaffold, wearing a tank top with a rough jacket tied around his narrow waist; or as a valet, wearing a starched, tight uniform that strained against his shoulders and traced the curve of his waist; or perhaps as a pool cleaner who only appeared in the summer, wearing nothing but loose shorts while skimming debris from the blue water... Spending a few years on manual labor, relying on his young, beautiful body, really was the most fitting path for him.
*I've raised a wild thing,* Bai Shi thought.
Lasis finally spoke.
"Then... are you gay?"
Bai Shi was only a few years older than these sisters. When he first came here with Miss Shang, he had probably had a brief, ambiguous flirtation with the older sister, though neither likely remembered it clearly. But Bai Shi had grown too fast. Every year they met, the gap between them widened. The sisters grew up normally, their eyes bright, their limbs lengthening at a leisurely pace. But not Bai Shi. Every time he appeared, it was as if he had been violently stretched or yanked upward. For a time, he could hardly keep up with his own growth rate, resulting in a constant slouch. Fortunately, he had very quickly discarded the light in his eyes to keep pace with his vigorous development. By then, the sisters had already started calling him "Mr. Bai." Between the older sister's complicated puberty and Bai Shi's frantic life, neither really remembered that flirtation, which had been about as significant as a soda with ice on a summer night.
Bai Shi turned to Lasis. "Do we look like biological brothers to you?"
Lasis looked at Pei Cangyu again and pursed her lips, seemingly unwilling to give up. "You... are quite similar in some ways."
Bai Shi let out a soft laugh. Hearing it, Pei Cangyu looked up at him, saw him talking to Lasis, and went back to his puzzle.
But Lasis saw that movement, and a shadow fell over her heart.
Bai Shi asked, "Like what?"
She had lost interest; it was clear he had won.
She answered listlessly, "I guess it's nothing."
Seeing her dejection, Bai Shi asked if she wanted something to eat. Lasis shook her head, then suddenly looked up again. "Mr. Bai, tell me about him."
Bai Shi asked good-naturedly, "What do you want to hear?"
"What is his condition? Is it serious? Has it been many years? When did you two meet?" Her eyes blinked rapidly.
Bai Shi smiled. "That's a lot. I'll tell you when there's a chance. But before that, would you like to go for a picnic by the lake tomorrow night? With us?"
***
Pei Cangyu watched as Bai Shi saw off the jubilant Lasis.
"What were you two talking about for so long?" Pei Cangyu finally gave up on the puzzle, sweeping the pieces into a mess and reaching for a beer while scratching his stomach.
Bai Shi walked back and sat down. "Just a friendly neighborly interaction. Do you want to go on a picnic?"
Pei Cangyu smiled. "Feeling poetic?"
"Let's call it integrating into life. Are you going?"
Pei Cangyu thought about it and agreed. "Do we need to buy anything?"
"I can go buy it," Bai Shi said, starting to stand up.
Pei Cangyu stood up as well and grabbed his arm. "Don't. It's boring staying here by myself. I'll go with you."
Bai Shi seemed a bit stunned by his proactive touch, but he quickly agreed. To him, it was a good thing that Pei Cangyu was trying as hard as he was to integrate into their new life.
They stepped out one after the other, pushing open the low gate of the yard. The mailman delivering newspapers tipped his cap to Pei Cangyu, presumably as a greeting. Pei Cangyu didn't know how to react; after hesitating for a few seconds, he ducked back behind Bai Shi.
Bai Shi greeted the mailman, who congratulated him on his brother finally feeling a bit better.
Pei Cangyu only breathed a sigh of relief once the mailman was far away. Bai Shi walked beside him, composed and serene, always carrying an air of leisurely calm.
This only made Pei Cangyu feel more miserable. He wasn't naturally an antisocial person. Even when he had faced sudden tragedies in the past, he had only developed a slight tendency to withdraw; he had never reached this state where he had to hide from people, like a patient incapable of self-care.
The more he thought about it, the more useless he felt, and his face flushed.
Bai Shi turned to look at the silent Pei Cangyu. "What's wrong?"
Pei Cangyu pursed his lips and forced a smile. "It's nothing... I was just thinking... maybe you could teach me their language?" He caught the look on Bai Shi's face and added, "To integrate into life... haha."
Bai Shi stopped walking. Pei Cangyu stopped as well.
Bai Shi smiled and placed a hand on Pei Cangyu’s shoulder. "You want to learn?"
Pei Cangyu didn't speak.
Bai Shi gestured for him to step aside. They turned into a secluded area by the side of a building. Bai Shi crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. Pei Cangyu stood before him like a student being lectured by a headmaster.
Bai Shi’s voice was incredibly gentle. "Do you want to learn?"
Pei Cangyu nodded vigorously. "Yes."
Bai Shi smiled warmly. "My thought is this: I don't recommend you learn."
Pei Cangyu suddenly felt a chill.
Bai Shi continued, "There are two main reasons. First, to keep our lives peaceful, I had to slightly... embellish your background. If you were to cause suspicion while communicating with outsiders—not necessarily on purpose, of course—it would be quite a bother for me. Dealing with them at that point would be very troublesome. Second," he smiled at this point, "it's a bit embarrassing to say, but I don't really want you socializing with others."
He leaned in closer and reached out to take Pei Cangyu’s hand. His hand was ice-cold. "Do you understand? I brought you here, to this open prison. Though it's not good to boast, it's quite creative, isn't it? If you wanted a job, it wouldn't be a problem. You see, if your heart is at peace, everything is easy to handle. But your heart isn't at peace—or rather, I have no way to confirm that it is. So, I have to use the clumsy method. You should understand that I give you a lot of freedom. If I wanted to completely cut off your interaction with others, there are many ways to do it. I assume you don't want it to come to that, do you?"
Pei Cangyu looked into Bai Shi’s eyes. They shone with a pleasant light. His tone was soft, and the corners of his mouth were turned up in a smile, but there was no mirth in his eyes. Pei Cangyu decided it was best not to provoke him right now.
Bai Shi held his hand and asked again, "Do you still want to learn?"
Pei Cangyu shook his head. His own hands and feet were beginning to turn cold.
Bai Shi smiled with relief and leaned down to kiss Pei Cangyu on the cheek. Pei Cangyu immediately broke out in goosebumps. He felt that this kiss held no more meaning than a reward for a well-behaved dog.
Bai Shi stood straight and squeezed Pei Cangyu’s shoulder. Pei Cangyu kept his head down, never looking up. He listened keenly to Bai Shi’s breathing and discovered a subtle change; it had become much steadier now.
Bai Shi hesitated, then leaned in close to Pei Cangyu. "...Sorry, did I scare you?"
Pei Cangyu looked up at Bai Shi. Bai Shi looked genuinely worried. He guessed that the moment of erratic breathing had passed.
He shook his head, but Bai Shi frowned and pulled him closer by the shoulder. "Alright, we can discuss it again, but don't always be so defiant."
*Defiant? Me?*
Pei Cangyu reflected on his own attitude.
Bai Shi smiled. "Alright, don't be angry. Let's go."
As he spoke, he took Pei Cangyu’s hand and led him out. When they left the side path and entered the crowd, Bai Shi let go of his hand.
Pei Cangyu looked down at the hand Bai Shi had released. For a split second, he felt he had finally grasped the logic of this madman.
***
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