A week ago, while Pei Cangyu was listlessly watering the grass in the yard, he found himself idly observing Jet’s house across the way.
Though the architectural styles were similar, Jet clearly put more heart into tending his garden. Even from a distance, Pei Cangyu could see several clusters of purple flowers. With obsessive-compulsive precision, the flowerbeds were divided into distinct sections, arranged by height from front to back.
Pei Cangyu leaned against the fence and peered over. No one seemed to be home. As he looked, he couldn't help but admire how clean Jet’s place appeared; the walls of their own house were often overgrown with creepers that required constant clearing.
His gaze traveled up the wall, stopping abruptly at a window with the curtains drawn.
Pei Cangyu checked the other windows; only this one, on the east side of the second floor, had its curtains closed. They were grey. Come to think of it, did Jet live alone?
Pei Cangyu stared at the window, feeling a bit dazed and sleepy, when he saw a black car pull up across the street. Jet stepped out, still dressed in a suit. He smiled and bid farewell to the driver before loosening his tie.
Pei Cangyu’s eyes shifted to him, but out of the corner of his eye, he caught a flicker of movement at the window he had just been watching!
He snapped his head up and saw someone shrinking back from behind the grey curtains.
Pei Cangyu stood up straight, staring intently at the spot.
Across the street, Jet noticed him—and the direction he was looking—and began walking over.
“Hi.” Jet had one hand tucked into his trouser pocket, his arms swinging with a rhythmic grace. His silver-white hair caught a faint glint in the setting sun. He was long-limbed and tall, his suit perfectly tailored, and his movements were light and brisk. He gave the impression of a casual soul beneath a formal exterior, a contrast softened by his natural charisma into pure elegance.
Pei Cangyu shifted his focus to Jet as he approached.
Jet pointed to the grass Pei had just watered. “You’ve kept your lawn well. Did you buy the turf in rolls?”
Pei Cangyu shook his head honestly. “I don’t know.”
Jet looked at him and smiled. “I’d like to invite you both over for dinner sometime. At my place.”
“Oh...”
“Because of my work, the neighbors here usually come to me to discuss things. My home is a place people visit often. If you don’t mind, I’d like to host you there. You can ask him—Mr. Bai, was it?”
Pei Cangyu gave an ambiguous grunt of affirmation. Looking at Jet’s silver hair in the sunlight, he blurted out, “Is that your natural hair color?”
“What?” Jet arched an eyebrow, a gesture that made him look quite young. “Oh, this. No. But I’ve been getting white hairs since I was young. After I turned thirty, I just decided to dye it all this color.” He rubbed his chin. “Is it strange?”
Pei Cangyu shook his head. Jet’s features were deep-set, and his skin had a healthy, sun-kissed glow that made the color look fitting. “You’re already thirty?”
Jet laughed. “I’ll be forty-five next year.”
Pei Cangyu’s eyes widened in surprise. Jet smiled and glanced behind him. “Is Mr. Bai not in?”
“He is. Right behind you.”
Jet blinked and turned around. Bai Shi, having just finished a run, had arrived at the front door. He glanced at Pei Cangyu, then smiled and shook Jet’s hand. Jet extended the dinner invitation again, and Bai Shi accepted.
Jet bid them goodbye and headed home. The two of them watched him enter his house before turning to go inside.
“I just saw a window with the curtains drawn on their second floor, even though he wasn't home...”
Bai Shi wiped his face. “Oh, he has a daughter.”
“Really?” Pei Cangyu looked at him. “Is he married?”
“A widower. The daughter is from his late wife’s previous marriage.”
Pei Cangyu looked at Bai Shi playfully. “You sure know a lot.”
“I chatted with some people while I was out running.”
“Are you a spy? Gathering intelligence every waking moment.”
“In a way. After all, I’m technically half a kidnapper now.”
“Half?” Pei Cangyu frowned at him. “What about the other half?”
Bai Shi leaned over and kissed his cheek. “The other half is the part you’ve permitted.”
Pei Cangyu: “...”
Bai Shi smiled and tossed his towel into the laundry basket. “But seriously, I think it’s best to be careful around him.”
“Why do you say that?”
Bai Shi paused, poured himself a glass of water, and leaned against the breakfast bar to look at Pei Cangyu. “What do you think of him? Use your intuition.”
“Hmm...” Pei Cangyu had been swaying on his stool, but he stopped at the question. “I can’t quite say.”
“Do you think he’s fake? Or hiding something?”
Pei Cangyu shook his head. “No. He seems very sincere. It’s rare.” He looked at Bai Shi. “You think he’s a problem? Based on what?”
“Nothing.” Bai Shi set down his glass and headed for the bathroom. “I just suspect everyone.”
***
Over the next few days, Jet made a point of telling them it was just a very ordinary, small gathering. It would only be him and his daughter, nothing lavish, and he urged Bai Shi and Pei Cangyu to be as casual as possible.
Pei Cangyu took him at his word and planned to wear a T-shirt. He already had his slippers on when he noticed Bai Shi putting on a suit jacket.
Pei Cangyu: “...”
Bai Shi: “What?”
“Didn’t he say to be casual?”
Bai Shi straightened his tie. “Just in case.”
“What for? Is that your battle armor?”
Bai Shi stopped and beckoned him over. Pei Cangyu walked up to him. Bai Shi tilted his neck back and pointed at his tie. “It’s a bit tight.”
“If it’s tight, loosen it,” Pei Cangyu muttered as he reached out to help him. He looked up at Bai Shi’s neck—it was clean, with faint blue veins visible beneath the skin. Bai Shi reached out, pulled him closer, and whispered in his ear, “What time is it?”
Pei Cangyu glanced at the clock. “Still two hours to go...” He suddenly got annoyed. “Then why are you changing so early?!”
“I misread the clock.” Bai Shi’s hand began to wander restlessly over his back, sliding under the oversized T-shirt to press against his slender spine.
Pei Cangyu frowned. “Really? I don’t believe you. When have you ever misread a clock?”
“Just now.”
“I don’t believe it. Impossible.”
Bai Shi’s touch made him itch, and then he pinched Pei’s waist. As Pei Cangyu tried to shrink back, Bai Shi followed.
“Then let’s just kill some time.”
As Pei Cangyu was led into the bedroom, he still had only one thought: “I’ve never seen you misread a clock. Even I don’t misread them...”
Bai Shi shrugged off his suit jacket and methodically loosened his tie and unbuttoned his shirt. He watched Pei Cangyu continue his argument about "misreading the clock," responding with patient "mhmms" until Pei suggested, "Maybe we should buy an alarm clock," at which point Bai Shi pinned him to the bed.
***
By the time Bai Shi rolled off him, Pei Cangyu had practically turned into a puddle. He lay prone, turning his head on the pillow and wiping his tears on the fabric—they weren't from pain.
He moved slightly, but the roots of his thighs felt particularly sore, so he decided to stay still. His body was slick with sweat and his underside felt sticky. The sharp pain in his thighs had faded into a dull ache that left him breathing in small, open-mouthed gasps.
Bai Shi reached out to stroke his hair, watching as Pei Cangyu closed his eyes and shifted his legs to let the final tremors of the afterglow dissipate, finally becoming motionless.
“It’s hot,” Pei said, his voice still raspy. He had cried out too much earlier. Bai Shi wanted to tell him that his voice had sounded both wanton and sweet, but Pei Cangyu would never admit it. In the heat of the moment, he would close his eyes and ignore everything but the pleasure; he would cry even if the thrusts weren't that hard, and if they were, he would start begging for mercy, his words a jumbled mess and his hands flailing. Bai Shi had to pin him down and hold him still just to move properly.
But Pei Cangyu remembered none of his own performance.
Bai Shi lowered the air conditioning temperature slightly. He reached out his hand, and Pei Cangyu, without even opening his eyes, huddled closer to him.
Bai Shi watched him for a moment, then stood up to get a cigarette. As soon as Pei Cangyu smelled the smoke, he turned his head. “I want one too.”
“Wait a moment.”
Pei Cangyu felt the scent of smoke draw near, but when he turned, he saw Bai Shi holding some kind of tool, gesturing over his back.
He sat up warily. “What are you doing?”
Bai Shi told him to lie back down and pulled the blanket off him. Suddenly exposed to the cool air, Pei Cangyu shivered. Bai Shi pressed down on his waist. “Don’t move.”
Pei Cangyu turned his head. “What is it?”
Bai Shi said, “A tattoo.”
Pei Cangyu pursed his lips and lay back down, looking annoyed but remaining still. Bai Shi made a few measurements, then looked at Pei Cangyu—his very short hair, his irritable face pressed sideways into the pillow, the silver ink he’d once used to fill the gap in his broken eyebrow, his high nose, the unhappy pout of his lips, and the thick eyelashes casting shadows as they fluttered against the pillow.
Bai Shi stood up, stepping onto the bed to look down at Pei Cangyu. He watched the lean muscles of his honey-toned body, his long limbs tangled in the messy white sheets, trembling slightly.
Losing patience, Pei Cangyu turned to look at him. “Is it—”
He froze. Bai Shi’s expression was dark and heavy, and he was very obviously aroused again.
Pei Cangyu sat up slightly. “I can help...”
“Don’t move.” Bai Shi stared at him.
Pei Cangyu hesitated. “I can use my mouth...”
Bai Shi stepped on his shoulder—not with much force, but with absolute certainty. “Don’t move.”
Pei Cangyu looked away and lay back down.
He couldn't see what Bai Shi was doing above him, but he could guess.
When a sudden chill hit his skin, he shuddered. Bai Shi leaned down to embrace him, kissed the corner of his mouth, and returned to that gentle tone: “Let’s do the tattoo another day. We have the gathering tonight.”
***
Consequently, Pei Cangyu carried a certain exhaustion with him when they went to visit. They were both dressed casually, which happened to match Jet’s style.
Jet was in a good mood. He shook Bai Shi’s hand and even gave Pei Cangyu a hug. Pei Cangyu found it baffling—did he look that approachable? Why couldn't Jet just shake his hand like a normal adult, the way he did with a "serious" person like Bai Shi?
Jet was wearing a deep purple shirt that accentuated his physique, yet he didn't look like someone who spent time in a kitchen. Pei Cangyu glanced toward the kitchen, expecting to see a hired housekeeper, but there was no one. Judging by the sounds, only one person was working in there.
Noticing his gaze, Jet smiled. “It’s fine. She’ll be out in a moment.”
As the three of them walked to the dining table, they saw that several dishes had already been served. Bai Shi apologized again for being late. Jet waved it off, saying it wasn't a problem at all.
After they sat down, no one picked up their chopsticks. Jet and Bai Shi chatted idly, while Pei Cangyu kept his eyes on the kitchen, curious about who was cooking.
A moment later, the person emerged.
It was a girl.
She looked about fifteen or sixteen, but she was short. She wore a long-sleeved grey sweater and a red-and-grey plaid skirt. She walked with a slight slouch, her red hair tied in a ponytail. Her face was lightly freckled, and her eyes didn't meet the guests'.
She said to Jet, “Only the duck soup is left.”
Jet smiled and stood up. “Thank you,” he said to the girl. Then he looked at Bai Shi and Pei Cangyu. “I’ll go help.” He pointed to a chair, and the girl sat down.
She didn't shrink away, but she didn't look at anyone either. Her expression was cold and detached, but to Pei Cangyu, she just looked bored.
Bai Shi never missed an opportunity to pretend to be a normal person. He smiled at the girl. “Did you cook all this? Thank you for your hard work.”
The girl glanced at him, then looked away, pouring water into her teacup as if he hadn't spoken.
For the first time in his life, Bai Shi had failed to charm someone, man or woman. He was stunned.
Pei Cangyu let out a snort of laughter, earning a resentful look from Bai Shi.
The girl also glanced at him.
Jet returned, placing the soup on a trivet, and shook out his napkin. “You wouldn't believe Vanessa’s skill... Oh, I forgot to introduce her. This is Vanessa, my adopted daughter, though I’ve always treated her as my own.” He looked at Pei Cangyu. “She understands your language. I hope you two can become good friends.”
Pei Cangyu looked at Vanessa. Even with his limited English experience, he felt the name didn't suit her.
“Hello,” Pei Cangyu said.
She gave a slight nod and continued cutting her steak.
Bai Shi looked at Jet. “Is there a high school here? Does she go to school locally?”
Jet nodded. “Yes. Actually, many of the foreign businessmen who lived here before didn't send their children to local schools. They just treated this as a temporary residence. In the long run, that’s not good for local development. I think development should...” He paused and looked at Bai Shi.
Bai Shi raised his glass and smiled. “I agree. I’m planning on staying here long-term.”
Jet’s eyes lit up, and he began to speak enthusiastically about his vision.
The two of them were soon deep in conversation.
Pei Cangyu, meanwhile, kept glancing at the girl. Her skin was a bit darker; she truly looked nothing like Jet. Her movements were very quiet, and she seemed unresponsive to her surroundings, never looking up.
Pei Cangyu wondered if she was just an introvert.
But then her eyes suddenly lifted, meeting Pei Cangyu’s across the table. Pei Cangyu felt a jolt; her eyes were a cold, icy blue.
But she quickly looked down again.
For the rest of the meal, Pei Cangyu didn't speak. His mind was occupied with the girl. He couldn't say why, but he always felt that blue eyes should be transparent, like you could see right through them, but hers were different. As he ate, he realized her eyes were actually a sort of grey-blue; he just hadn't seen many blue-eyed people, so he had generalized.
Bai Shi and Jet were getting along famously, talking about everything under the sun. In Bai Shi’s narrative, he was an entrepreneur, but at his age, it was hard to believe he was self-made. Jet seemed to see through this; his years of experience gave him a way with people like Bai Shi. He treated Bai Shi like an old fox smoothing a wolf’s fur—with a hint of coaxing and flattery. Bai Shi might have noticed and not cared, or perhaps he just didn't mind, continuing to speak according to his own logic and rhythm.
Pei Cangyu listened to the occasional bursts of laughter from their conversation and glanced at the girl again. As she reached for a sauce, her left hand turned over. Pei’s eyes followed the movement and he froze in shock. But the girl quickly lowered her hand, hiding the scar on her wrist.
Pei Cangyu began to cough.
Jet and Bai Shi stopped talking and turned to him. Jet kindly asked if he wanted more wine, but Pei Cangyu shook his head.
Overall, the dinner went well. Jet saw them to the door, exchanged a few more pleasantries, and said goodbye. Vanessa didn't come out, though her busy silhouette could be seen inside.
A lingering sense of shadow hung over Pei Cangyu’s heart, though he didn't know its source.
Bai Shi had already walked ahead. He turned back. “What’s wrong?”
“Oh, nothing.” Pei Cangyu quickened his pace to catch up, then glanced back one last time.
That glance sent a cold shiver down his spine.
It wasn't a scene that should have caused such a reaction. In fact, it looked like any ordinary family. Through the screen door, Pei Cangyu saw Jet walk up to Vanessa and pat her on the shoulder.
Pei Cangyu finally understood where the dissonance came from. Jet was still the picture of elegance—fashionably dressed, suave, refined, and meticulous. But Vanessa was the exact opposite. Her shoulders were slumped, her clothes were a dull, elderly grey-white, and her entire being radiated a desire to hide herself away. She was devoid of life.
Even when it was time for bed, Pei Cangyu remained lost in thought.
Bai Shi tilted his head, looking at him, feeling for the first time that he had no idea what Pei was thinking. He touched Pei’s waist, wanting to continue the tattoo from the afternoon, but Pei Cangyu pushed his hand away and sat in a chair to smoke.
“What is it?” Bai Shi sat across from him.
Pei Cangyu shook his head. He hadn't sorted out his thoughts yet.
Bai Shi stood up to shower and get ready for bed.
When he returned, he turned off the lights and made the bed, but Pei Cangyu was still sitting by the window, staring blankly.
Bai Shi asked, “Have you fallen in love with someone?”
Pei Cangyu rolled his eyes.
Bai Shi lay down. “If you fall in love with someone, you have to tell me.”
“And then what? You’ll give us your blessing and play a wedding song?”
Bai Shi looked at him in surprise. “Is that the kind of person you think I am?”
Pei Cangyu ignored him.
Bai Shi watched him for a while, then lay back, clicked on the bedside lamp, and picked up a book.
Pei Cangyu remained silent, smoking and watching the moon. Bai Shi read, the sound of turning pages the only noise in the quiet, drowsy room.
“I used to...”
Hearing Pei speak, Bai Shi looked up, resting the book on his lap. Pei Cangyu wasn't looking at him; he was still staring outside.
“It’s just like this.”
Bai Shi sat up a bit straighter, his voice soft. “What is?”
“You know, this kind of thing... he basically... he steals the light.”
Bai Shi frowned. He didn't understand, but he gave a small "mhm."
Pei Cangyu suddenly became agitated. He stubbed out his cigarette and turned to Bai Shi.
“It’s like... him... it’s like a law of conservation. He takes these things from you to nourish himself. It makes him more confident. This secret makes him thrive.” Pei Cangyu spoke quickly, his words lacking clear order.
Bai Shi turned serious. He set down his book, walked over, and knelt before him, taking his hand. “Say that again?”
Pei Cangyu licked his lips. “And then you just wither away. It’s inevitable. He’s like a tree blocking your sun. Unless you leave, nothing will ever change.”
Bai Shi narrowed his eyes. Pei Cangyu was using metaphors again, talking in circles to describe something he didn't want to say directly. Pei looked at Bai Shi urgently, hoping he would understand.
Bai Shi looked down, then stood up and sat across from Pei. After a moment’s hesitation, he said, “Are you talking about Jet and Vanessa?”
For a second, Pei Cangyu’s eyes looked deeply wounded, like a vampire dragged into the sunlight. But he nodded.
Bai Shi sighed. “Why?”
“Why?” Pei Cangyu blinked. “I... I don’t know... a feeling...”
“A feeling of what?”
“She has a secret.”
Bai Shi looked at him with a complex expression before saying, “She had an abortion. Before she moved here with her mother after the remarriage, she was quite... active.” Bai Shi seemed to choose his words carefully. “Socially. Consequently, she had a lot of trouble in her romantic life... if you consider what ten-year-olds have to be ‘romance.’”
Pei Cangyu looked at Bai Shi, completely bewildered.
“To put it simply,” Bai Shi said, laying it out plainly, “where they lived before, people called her a ‘slut.’ Her situation only improved after she came here with her mother. She’s two grades behind because she dropped out for a while.” Bai Shi looked at Pei again. “It’s normal for someone trying to turn over a new leaf to have secrets.”
Pei Cangyu looked astonished. “Does what you’re saying have anything to do with what I’m saying?”
It was Bai Shi’s turn to be stunned.
Pei Cangyu said, “I’m saying that man is the problem.”
Bai Shi patted his hand soothingly. “Maybe. Don’t ask too many questions. Family matters are the hardest to untangle, and you don’t have any evidence.”
“But...”
Bai Shi stood up and made a downward pressing motion with his hand—a habitual gesture of leadership. “Alright, that’s enough.”
He began walking toward the bed. “It’s late. Let’s sleep.”
He reached the bed only to realize Pei Cangyu hadn't moved.
Pei Cangyu was looking at him with disbelief. “Are you fucking telling me what to do?”
Bai Shi reached out. “I only meant...”
Pei Cangyu stood up, gave him a slow, cold glance, and walked out.
Bai Shi immediately followed him, watching Pei head upstairs. “Where are you going?”
Pei Cangyu ignored him. Bai Shi followed him up and watched as Pei picked a random room and slammed the door. Bai Shi stood outside, questioning him.
Bai Shi was incredibly patient, eventually annoying Pei Cangyu enough that he yanked the door open. Bai Shi practically jumped, but Pei pressed down on his shoulder. “Don’t. Don’t get excited.”
Bai Shi said gently, “It’s like this: I’ve looked into their history.”
Pei Cangyu nodded. “Alright, alright, stop pretending. I know you don’t believe me, and you don’t care.”
Bai Shi fell silent.
Pei Cangyu gave him a small smile. “I’m going to sleep. It’s late.”
Bai Shi took a step back. Pei Cangyu closed the door.
***
| Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation |
| :--- | :--- | :--- |
| 凡妮莎 | Vanessa | Jet's stepdaughter. |
| 断眉 | Broken eyebrow | Refers to a gap or scar in the eyebrow, often a stylistic choice or from an injury. |
| 鳏夫 | Widower | A man whose wife has died. |
| 爬山虎 | Creepers / Boston Ivy | A type of climbing plant. |
| 扣肩 | Slouching / Hunched shoulders | A physical posture indicating low confidence or withdrawal. |
