Unable to be Arrogant [Entertainment Circle] | Chapter 98 | A Heartfelt Confession | Novela.app

Their predictions were correct; the day after the typhoon brought truly beautiful weather. Even the high noon sun seemed much warmer than usual. "Alright! Let's take a break. We'll film the next scene in a bit—" Tang Shang shouted to everyone. The second scene of the afternoon finally came to an end. Several actors let out a collective sigh of relief. "So, by that count, you two are about to wrap up your filming," Ge Xianxu said to Jiang Siyang and Yuan Yuan. Ge Xianxu was wearing a short-haired wig, looking very gallant and spirited. "Yeah," Yuan Yuan nodded, tying up her long hair. "I should be the first to wrap up. Once I'm done, my group is starting our concert tour. I'll save seats for you all then; you have to find time to come see me." Ge Xianxu nodded. "Of course. Which month is your concert?" "There are several shows, the specific dates aren't set yet, but there's definitely one in December," Yuan Yuan said. "Alright, I'll see if I have time then," Jiang Siyang said. Yuan Yuan was delighted. "Great, consider my pitch successful then," Yuan Yuan said. "I'll welcome any of you who can make it. Everyone gets a VVIP reservation." Jiang Siyang and Ge Xianxu both laughed. "What about you, Jiang Siyang? What are your plans for afterward?" Yuan Yuan turned to him. "Just the usual activities, all work-related. No special plans," Jiang Siyang answered honestly. "If I had to say there was something, it would be before I wrap up. There's one thing I want to do before then." "What is it?" Yuan Yuan asked. Jiang Siyang smiled but didn't answer. Ge Xianxu, having better intuition, immediately nudged Yuan Yuan’s arm. "It’s probably a private matter, so don't ask. Let's go go over our lines." Yuan Yuan nodded. "Okay, let me go grab my script." Ge Xianxu was pulled away by Yuan Yuan, but she didn't forget to wave to Jiang Siyang before leaving. "We're heading out first." "Alright," Jiang Siyang replied. Jiang Siyang didn't stay on set for long either; he went to the lounge to memorize his lines. He flipped through the script. The next scene was indeed very important. Except for Zhang Jin'an, all the main and supporting characters would be present. It was no wonder Tang Shang had started directing the crew to set up the camera positions so early; they really did need a lot of angles. Initially, he was the only one in the lounge, but later Liu Wenping came in. She sat on the sofa using her laptop, chatting with him from time to time. "That typhoon yesterday was really something," Liu Wenping said. "It was. I took some photos, you can really tell," Jiang Siyang replied while looking at his script. "Then did you..." Liu Wenping's words were interrupted by a knock at the door. She went to open it, and Xie Jie walked in. "Gosh, I thought it was someone else," Liu Wenping said. "What's wrong with me?" Xie Jie scratched his head, then added, "Oh, I just saw Zhang Jin'an." Jiang Siyang was a bit surprised. "He's here this early?" Not long ago, Jiang Siyang had told Xie Jie about his feelings for Zhang Jin'an, so there was no need to hide it now. His reaction was his natural one. However, when Xie Jie first heard the news, he had simply been shocked, saying, "I couldn't tell at all." "I don't know, but I ran into them just now. He was chatting with his manager," Xie Jie said. "Oh..." Jiang Siyang responded. Liu Wenping looked at Xie Jie, then at Jiang Siyang, and suddenly teased, "Siyang, being apart for just a few days feels like three years, doesn't it?" Jiang Siyang smiled. He had missed Zhang Jin'an very much yesterday, which was why he had called. He originally thought it was because of the typhoon, but he later realized that even after the storm passed, he would still miss the person he was meant to miss. Xie Jie patted Jiang Siyang on the shoulder. "How pitiful, how pitiful. Back in high school, I had a crush on our class beauty and confessed the very next day." Jiang Siyang looked up at him, and Liu Wenping was also curious about the outcome. After all, this was the first time Xie Jie had shared a story from his high school days. "And then?" Liu Wenping asked. Xie Jie: "I was rejected." Liu Wenping: "..." Jiang Siyang: "..." "Then what was the point of saying that? I thought you were going to tell him to just say it and get it over with," Liu Wenping said. Xie Jie looked aggrieved. "I was just sharing..." *** "Today is a good opportunity for some alone time. I'll do my best to lead Liu Wenping and Xie Jie away, don't worry," Li Qiang said confidently to Zhang Jin'an. The two of them stood at the door, hesitating to enter, specifically to discuss how to make use of today's time. After all, Jiang Siyang didn't have much time left with the crew; every minute had to be seized. "But man, Xie Jie walking past just now really scared me," Li Qiang said. "We're not stealing anything, why are you so nervous?" Zhang Jin'an laughed. "Let's go." "Yeah." The two of them entered one after the other. Some staff members saw Zhang Jin'an and greeted him. Zhang Jin'an first went to find Director Tang to understand the specific blocking for today's shoot before asking, "Director Tang, do you know where Siyang went? I want to run some lines with him." Tang Shang pointed toward the lounge. "Ah... I think he went to the lounge, but I'm not sure. Go see if anyone's there." "Alright, thanks, Director Tang." After thanking him, Zhang Jin'an walked toward Li Qiang, who was standing by the wall. "It's the lounge, I knew it," Li Qiang said. "Yes, Qiang-ge is the best," Zhang Jin'an echoed. Zhang Jin'an walked to the lounge door and knocked. *Knock, knock, knock.* "Who is it? Why is it so busy here today..." Liu Wenping opened the door, but the moment she saw the visitor, she fell silent. "Zhang... Zhang Jin'an?" Upon hearing that name, Jiang Siyang stood up, and Xie Jie also turned to look at Zhang Jin'an. The scene was inexplicably comical. Zhang Jin'an smiled. "What? Are you all that happy to see me?" *More than just happy, we practically want to drag you in,* Liu Wenping thought. Liu Wenping looked behind Zhang Jin'an and saw Li Qiang. She gave Xie Jie a look, and Xie Jie immediately understood. He said to Li Qiang, "Qiang-ge, I have something to talk to you about. It's not convenient here, let's go outside." Li Qiang was delighted and secretly thought to Zhang Jin'an, *Isn't this a coincidence?* He then nodded to Xie Jie. "Sure, let's find a place to talk." "Alright," Xie Jie replied. "Sister Liu, let's go." "Okay." Liu Wenping winked at Jiang Siyang before leaving and closing the door. Unfortunately, Jiang Siyang didn't see that wink; his gaze had been fixed on Zhang Jin'an from the very beginning. The lounge, which had been bustling just seconds ago, returned to silence in an instant. "Why did you come over so early, Ge?" Jiang Siyang asked. "Didn't I say? I'd hurry over as fast as I could," Zhang Jin'an pulled up a chair and sat directly opposite Jiang Siyang. "When have I ever lied to you?" Jiang Siyang smiled. "What we said yesterday came true. The weather really is great today." Jiang Siyang turned slightly and pointed toward the window. They were on the fifth floor, and the lounge window faced an open space. The window framed the azure sky like a painting. Zhang Jin'an nodded. "A big blue sky, perfect for flying kites." He suddenly remembered something. "I think we could organize a group trip in the future." Jiang Siyang thought it was a good suggestion. "Sure, if there's an opportunity." Zhang Jin'an smiled. "Shall we run our lines now? I see there's still some time before things are ready outside." "Okay," Jiang Siyang nodded. The two of them began to rehearse. In this scene, the dialogue between Jiang Siyang and Zhang Jin'an was only a few lines long. After two tries, they had it down perfectly. Next were their respective solo parts or scenes with others. Jiang Siyang's solo dialogue was only about a dozen lines. Zhang Jin'an pointed out some areas for improvement: "This line of Cui Chi's is a lie, so he should be a bit flustered when he says it, only steadying himself later until he almost believes it himself. The main tone of this scene is quite sad; everyone is experiencing a parting. So, the last few lines should carry a hint of sorrow. It would be best if you could have tears in your eyes during the farewell without actually letting them fall. But that's quite difficult. Saying the lines like this is also fine." Jiang Siyang nodded thoughtfully. Zhang Jin'an waited patiently. He took this opportunity to carefully observe Jiang Siyang, wanting to memorize every frown and smile. He could sit like this and watch him all day. Jiang Siyang suddenly looked up, but Zhang Jin'an didn't look away, meeting his gaze directly. Zhang Jin'an noticed that Jiang Siyang was visibly startled for a moment. However, Jiang Siyang quickly looked back at the script and said, "I understand. I think we can try it." "Alright," Zhang Jin'an said. The first attempt naturally wasn't perfect. Zhang Jin'an offered a few more suggestions, and they tried again. "No... the emotion here is still a bit off... the emphasis is wrong. The focus should be on 'okay?'" Zhang Jin'an thought for a moment. "Siyang, have you ever had a heart-wrenching experience of parting? The kind you still remember now." Jiang Siyang thought about it and nodded. "...Yes." "Then that's it. When you perform this, just think about your experience from back then," Zhang Jin'an paused, his tone becoming slightly serious. "But this method can only be used once or twice. If you always rely on 'past' emotions to act out emotional scenes, it can be quite damaging. Constantly reopening a wound you've worked hard to close... it doesn't feel good." Jiang Siyang indicated he understood. "Then... one more time?" Jiang Siyang asked. "Okay," Zhang Jin'an replied. "Let's go straight to the final section." Jiang Siyang took a deep breath. "The promise I once made to you, I will fulfill it one day, but... not now," Jiang Siyang said slowly. "You have a bright future ahead of you; you shouldn't have met me. There are still many mountains and rivers in the mortal world for you to enjoy. Those don't belong to me; they belong to you." Jiang Siyang lowered his head. That day, she had said the same thing. She had held his hand with her skeletal, skin-and-bones hand. Jiang Siyang knew clearly that the aching sensation in his heart now was no different from how it felt in the hospital room that day. He remembered everything she had said. She said, *You must live well.* She said, *You must do what you love. You aren't who other people say you are; you are just yourself.* She said, *My only wish is for you to be happy.* "I hope you live well, have your own ideals, and no longer live for others. I hope that when I meet you again, you'll be just as you were when we first met. You only need to stand there." She also said, *We all support your decision because you deserve our support and understanding.* *I have always been proud that you are my son. So, if there is a next life, I hope we can meet again.* "Although I don't know how long I'll be gone this time, or if I'll ever return, please promise me." *Go and live a good life. Yangyang, promise me, okay?* *Okay?* "...Okay?" The last word carried a slight sob. Not bad. Zhang Jin'an expressed his satisfaction and clapped his hands. "Very good. This time was excellent. As expected, when you bring real emotion into it, it's easy to perform well." "..." The person opposite him slowly looked up. When Zhang Jin'an saw his eyes, he was stunned. Jiang Siyang's eyes were filled with tears that refused to fall. Only after he blinked did those two teardrops slide down his cheeks, landing straight on his trousers. This was the first time Zhang Jin'an had seen Jiang Siyang cry outside of a scene, and he was momentarily flustered. His instinct was to reach out and wipe the tears away with his fingers, but he froze just as he raised his hand. Instead, he pulled out a tissue and handed it to Jiang Siyang. He didn't know why Jiang Siyang was crying or for whom. He only knew that if they were together right now, it would be so much better—then he wouldn't have to pull his hand back. Zhang Jin'an looked down at his lowered right hand. Even though it was Jiang Siyang who was crying, his own heart felt as if it were blocked by something; it was painful. Once Jiang Siyang finished wiping his eyes, Zhang Jin'an asked cautiously, "Are you okay?" "I'm fine, I just thought of something from the past," Jiang Siyang flashed a smile at him, as if he wasn't the one who had just been in tears. "..." Zhang Jin'an remained silent for a few seconds before nodding. Jiang Siyang reflected that since his mother passed away, he hadn't cried over things in his life for a long time. Crying like this actually soothed his nerves a bit; he felt more refreshed. However, he felt that Zhang Jin'an's spirit seemed a bit off. During the subsequent line rehearsal, Zhang Jin'an kept forgetting a few lines. "You're lying to me, aren't you?" Jiang Siyang read Su Rong's line, but he waited in vain for Zhang Jin'an's response. "...Ge?" Jiang Siyang put down the script and whispered a reminder. Zhang Jin'an held the script, but he looked as if he had just snapped out of a daze. "Ah... ah, sorry. I was just thinking about something." "...Should we stop for a bit?" Jiang Siyang asked uncertainly. Zhang Jin'an looked at him intently and shook his head. "No, let's start over. I won't get distracted again." Jiang Siyang nodded. "Okay." Jiang Siyang began reading Su Rong's lines: "Do you remember the play we watched that day? There was a passage in it that left a particularly deep impression on me." "Don't say it..." Zhang Jin'an frowned. Jiang Siyang continued regardless: "The twilight takes away the dusk, and the universe bursts forth with unknown little planets." "Don't say it," Zhang Jin'an's voice dropped another notch. "I held your hand to welcome the morning sun of that day; there was even dew on the hyacinths," Jiang Siyang went on. "Enough," Zhang Jin'an sighed. "Enough, Su Rong." "Why? Why?" Jiang Siyang asked indignantly. "Because..." Zhang Jin'an paused. Chen Yijun's next line should have been, "Because I don't love you anymore, so everything is useless." Instead, Jiang Siyang heard: "Because I love you." Jiang Siyang looked at the man opposite him in disbelief. "What?" As if afraid Jiang Siyang would think he was just reciting lines, Zhang Jin'an repeated it, making it exceptionally specific this time: "Because I love you, Siyang. This isn't a line; it's what I've wanted to say to you all along." Seeing that Jiang Siyang didn't speak, Zhang Jin'an continued, "You might be a bit surprised, but... I'm truly sincere. This was the 'matter on my mind' I mentioned before." A few seconds later, Jiang Siyang finally replied, "...Could this be an illusion?" Zhang Jin'an shook his head. "I originally thought it was an illusion. At first, I used the weather as an excuse. But whether it was that dusk, that night, that rainy day, that rainbow, or the recent typhoon, I was thinking of you. Later I thought, yes, how could a person's feelings be swayed by the weather..." With every word Zhang Jin'an spoke, Jiang Siyang felt his heart tighten. He looked into Zhang Jin'an's eyes; they held soft, fragmented sunlight, just like the azure sky outside—something to be yearned for. The owner of those eyes said to him, "I simply love you." After finishing, Zhang Jin'an felt a bit lighter as he waited for the other's response. He had already decided that if Jiang Siyang rejected him, he would tell him not to take it to heart, and if they met later, then... "The words I said during our rehearsal that day were my true feelings." While Zhang Jin'an was lost in thought, he heard those words. After processing them, Zhang Jin'an's eyes widened. He stood up with a "whoosh," saying excitedly, "Then you mean..." Jiang Siyang also stood up, somewhat awkwardly pulling a piece of paper from his pocket. "I originally thought I was the one who liked you first, and I even drafted some plans, thinking I'd try something before we wrapped up. But I didn't expect you to..." Before Jiang Siyang could finish, he was pulled into a tight embrace by the man in front of him. "I'm so happy... so happy," Zhang Jin'an repeated incessantly. He didn't want to let go; this was the person he had dreamed of. Zhang Jin'an held him even tighter, and he felt a pair of hands climb up his own back. Zhang Jin'an brushed his nose against Jiang Siyang's hair. "Am I really not dreaming?" "Speaking of dreams, I had one yesterday," Jiang Siyang said by his ear. Zhang Jin'an loosened his grip and asked curiously, "What dream?" "I dreamed we were watching a musical. It was an adaptation of *Love's Philosophy*, so the memory is very vivid. It said, 'And the sunlight clasps the earth, And the moonbeams kiss the sea; What are all these kissings worth, If thou kiss not me?' And then I..." Jiang Siyang suddenly stopped and lowered his eyes. "And then you..." Zhang Jin'an tilted his head. "And then... I kissed you..." Jiang Siyang's voice grew smaller and smaller until he fell silent. But Zhang Jin'an heard everything. Noticing Jiang Siyang's ears slowly turning red, he couldn't help but smile and say softly, "Dreams and reality are opposites." "Hmm?" Jiang Siyang looked up. "So, it's me who kisses you." With that, Zhang Jin'an placed their first kiss on the corner of Jiang Siyang's mouth. *And the sunlight clasps the earth, And the moonbeams kiss the sea; What are all these kissings worth, If thou kiss not me.* The kiss was as light as a dragonfly skimming the water, yet it stirred up layer upon layer of ripples—at least for the two of them. Zhang Jin'an was reluctant to pull away. He watched as Jiang Siyang pursed his lips and then looked straight at him. He heard Jiang Siyang say, "But Chen Yijun, how can I believe what you're saying now? I think everything you say is false. You're lying to me." Zhang Jin'an knew this line; it was Su Rong's line. His next line should have been, "Because I will forget you; I will never remember you again." But he didn't want to say that. So, Zhang Jin'an smiled. "I am indeed lying to you. I love you, and I will love you forever." *** **Glossary** Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation ---|---|--- 杀青 | Wrap up | The completion of filming for a movie or show. 对戏 / 对台词 | Run lines / Rehearse lines | Actors practicing their dialogue together. 肃容 | Su Rong | Jiang Siyang's character in the drama. 陈毅君 | Chen Yijun | Zhang Jin'an's character in the drama. 崔驰 | Cui Chi | A character mentioned in the script. 如隔三秋 | Like three autumns | From the idiom "One day apart feels like three autumns," meaning to miss someone dearly. 蜻蜓点水 | Like a dragonfly skimming the water | An idiom meaning a light, superficial touch. Love's Philosophy | Love's Philosophy | A poem by Percy Bysshe Shelley.