As the red sun sank in the west, the earth seemed instantly stained by the ink of night. Lights flickered on in the clusters of small apartment buildings, and the aroma of cooking drifted from behind greasy, mottled window screens. The high-pitched, lighthearted laughter of children mingled with the blaring volume of a nearby television.
"...To ensure the health of athletes and spectators, the organizers of this year's Olympics have implemented a series of measures to improve air quality..."
A thin wrist, covered in various cuts and scars, released its grip on the rusted railing of the rooftop and plummeted into the darkness.
*Thud!*
The heavy impact behind her startled Wei Zhi, who was currently delivering food in the Blue Sky Residential Area. The soup from the side dish in her transparent plastic bag nearly spilled. As she straightened the tilted containers, she looked toward the source of the sound with confusion.
A red terracotta flowerpot lay shattered on the ground, the canna lilies inside still looking remarkably fresh.
Wei Zhi didn't have time to feel the lingering fear of what would have happened if the pot had hit her head. She skirted around the manhole cover in front of the stairwell and hurried into Building Two, racing up to the seventh floor without pausing for breath.
"I'm so sorry to keep you waiting..."
The moment the door opened, Wei Zhi’s body reflexively began to bow in apology. Before she could finish her sentence, the customer snatched the delivery from her hand and slammed the security door shut without a word.
Before Wei Zhi had even exited the building, the notification for a late delivery penalty had already reached her phone.
Calculating how many more orders she would need to deliver to make up for the deducted pay, Wei Zhi hopped back onto the small electric scooter she rented from the delivery station and continued weaving through the city's narrow alleys.
At one in the morning, Wei Zhi finished her last order and returned to the distribution station. She skillfully returned the scooter, took off her helmet and uniform, and placed them in her locker.
The station manager was sleeping in the small, open-door breakroom nearby, his snoring like rolling thunder.
At 1:00 AM, the streets of Jiangdu were almost deserted. Only the occasional taxi or electric bike darting across the road made any sound.
It was a fifteen-minute walk from the distribution station back to the Wei household. From the main road to the side streets, then cutting through the alleys—moving from the brightly lit areas into the deep silence—she finally reached the only lit spot among the low-rise buildings: the Wei home.
Wang Lin sat in a rattan armchair, using two bottles of Coca-Cola on the counter as a stand for her phone, absentmindedly watching a drama.
Hearing footsteps approaching from the distance, she immediately paused the video and walked outside the small grocery store to look out.
When Wei Zhi’s figure emerged from the dim night, the worry in Wang Lin’s eyes seemed to drop like a suspended object finally hitting the ground, turning into relief mixed with a different kind of anxiety.
"Xiao Zhi, have you had dinner? Do you want Mom to cook some noodles for you?"
"I ate at the company." Wei Zhi’s gaze swept over the rattan chair that still held Wang Lin’s body heat and the paused phone. A sudden surge of irritation made the cramped shop, piled high with grains, oil, and sundries, feel even more suffocating. "Are those two bums dead? Why do they make you pull an all-nighter to watch the shop every day? Don't they know you're still sick?"
Her resentment and anger spilled out along with her biting words.
"Don't say that. I don't count on your father for anything, and your brother has been busy looking for a job lately. Anyway, I rest when there are no customers; it’s no trouble." Wang Lin hesitated for a moment. Between questioning her own words and continuing to advise Wei Zhi, she chose to change the subject.
"Are you really not hungry?" she asked, smiling cautiously at Wei Zhi. "I made some meat sauce during the day; I'll make you some Zha Jiang noodles."
Wei Zhi forcibly suppressed the boiling sensation in her chest that felt like it wanted to burst out. She dropped a cold "I'm not eating" and walked through the narrow aisle, which only allowed one person to pass through the piles of goods. She opened the drafty wooden door to enter the living area behind the grocery store.
This first-floor residence, less than eighty square meters, had originally been a two-bedroom, one-living-room layout when Wei Shan bought it twenty-six years ago with his life savings. Back then, the Urban Planning Law had just been implemented, and there were always ways to exploit loopholes. Wei Shan had knocked down the wall of the living room facing the street to convert it into a small grocery store. Of the two remaining rooms, one was the master bedroom for the couple, and the other was reserved for their soon-to-be-born son.
Unfortunately, the one born was Wei Zhi.
In the Jiangdu of 1990, not only was illegal construction easy, but registering a household was also simple. Wei Shan had wanted to sell her for five hundred yuan to a forty-year-old bachelor who couldn't find a wife; it was only because Wang Lin threatened to kill herself that she was kept.
*A girl is no good.*
*A girl can't carry on the family line.*
*A girl will let the Wei family's incense fire die out.*
When it came time to register her name, Wei Zhi almost became "Wei Zhaodi" (meaning "Lead a Younger Brother"). Again, it was Wang Lin’s repeated pleading—saying "Zhaodi" sounded ugly and suggesting "Zhi" instead—that changed it. "Zhi" (芷) sounded like "Zhi" (止 - stop/end). It carried the same underlying meaning.
And so, Wei Zhi became Wei Zhi.
Wei Zhi often wondered if it would be better if she were like Wei Shan, feeling only pure love or pure hate for a person. How exactly did one make a heart so clearly divided, rather than being pulled back and forth by love and hate?
Showering, washing her face, taking her medicine.
Blinking, breathing.
Everything was permeated with exhaustion.
Only when she lay down on the bed did Wei Zhi’s body finally seem to understand that the day’s work was over. A wave of weakness flooded through her limbs and bones.
She looked up at the window screen above her.
Insects danced in the moonlight, trying to find a hole loosened by the wear of time to invade.
The 1.2-meter-wide balcony served as a place to dry clothes during the day; at night, when the folding bed was let down, it became her room. At either end of the room were two permanently closed doors, with rhythmic snoring drifting out from behind each.
In the year after she was born, her brother was also born. Wei Shan had held his son—the one with the "handle"—high in the air, his face flushed red as he beamed, calling out: "Wei Lai, Wei Lai, I'm your daddy!"
It wasn't until she started elementary school that she realized not every older sister with a younger brother lacked her own room—if that 1.2-meter balcony didn't count as a real room.
Her belongings were squeezed into colorful, cheap storage boxes, and she was trapped on a sixty-yuan folding bed.
She stared at the insects trying so hard to burrow into the cage and whispered.
"...Idiots."
***
Five hours later, the alarm under her pillow went off. Wei Zhi turned off her phone and got out of bed, smelling the aroma of soy milk drifting through the air.
The dining table was exceptionally orderly today. Aside from Wang Lin, who was still guarding the shop, even Wei Shan and Wei Lai—who usually slept until the sun was high—were up early.
Wei Shan was up because he had an early mahjong game scheduled; Wei Lai was up because Wei Shan didn't like anyone sleeping later than him.
"What time is it even... making me get up, I can't eat anything at all," Wei Lai complained, sitting at the table with bleary eyes.
"It's already seven! Get up! If you get up early and send out a few more resumes, maybe you'll actually get picked."
"It's the internet age now, who still sends paper resumes?" Wei Lai muttered defiantly.
"Sending them is better than not!"
Wei Shan held a boiled egg, tapping it repeatedly against the smooth, rounded corner of the table until the entire shell was covered in cracks. Then, using fingers calloused from years of mahjong, he peeled away the shell in one go.
The white, tender egg made his fingers look even more cracked and sallow.
Wei Shan suddenly turned his head and looked at Wei Zhi with a pleasant expression. "Daughter, next month is your father's fiftieth birthday. Have you thought about what gift to give me?"
"What is Wei Lai giving?"
"What he gives is his business. Have you thought about what you're giving?" Only at times like this did Wei Shan fail to hear the impatience and coldness in her voice. His eyes gleamed with greed as he continued to smile. "I went to the gold shop a few days ago and saw a gold bracelet. It was so grand, and it happened to have a Pi Xiu charm on it. If you buy that for your old man, it'll ward off evil and attract wealth—just the thing to get rid of the bad luck I've had these past few years!"
"The bad luck you need to get rid of isn't just from the past few years," Wei Zhi thought, but she swallowed the words. She knew that if she spoke them, she would definitely be late for work today.
She gulped down the last of the soy milk in her cup, picked up her LV bag, and stood up to leave.
"No money."
"What kind of attitude is that?!"
Wei Shan jumped up and chased her to the entryway, nearly getting his nose smashed by the wooden door as it swung shut.
He angrily craned his neck and shouted at Wei Zhi’s retreating back:
"Don't think just because you're grown and your wings are hard that you can ignore me! I'm telling you, even if you fly to the heavens, I'm still your father! It's just a bracelet, does it have to make you that upset? Short-sighted! When I strike it rich, you'll be the one regretting it!"
"I shouldn't have let you go to that university! The more you study, the more you regress. You've completely forgotten how to write the word 'filial'!"
Wei Zhi didn't look back as she strode out of the grocery store.
Once her field of vision opened up, even the air seemed fresher. She tried her best to adjust her emotions and walked quickly toward the bus stop.
Heaven is above, Hell is below, and the place where she lived—neither dead nor alive—was called the mortal world.
The commute from the Wei house to her workplace took half an hour by bus. When Wei Zhi boarded, there happened to be an empty window seat in a double row, with an office worker playing on a phone sitting next to it.
Wei Zhi felt lucky as she occupied the seat before anyone else could.
Two elderly people who were squeezing toward the spot could only turn away in disappointment, while the office worker whose knee Wei Zhi had bumped looked up at her.
After Wei Zhi whispered an apology, the person lowered their head again.
Once settled, she intended to browse her social feed, only to find that the first post was a new update from Wei Shan.
"As the saying goes, a daughter is a father's little silk-padded jacket, but my daughter's conscience has been eaten by dogs. No wonder my chest has been feeling tight and I've been short of breath lately; it's all from being angered by my child."
The attached photo was a blister pack of half-eaten painkillers.
Wei Zhi sneered and replied below: "You deserve it."
Knowing a barrage of "deadly" phone calls would soon follow, she decisively blocked Wei Shan’s number and WeChat before that could happen.
She decided not to look at her phone anymore to avoid further frustration and turned to look out the window.
The bus swayed gently as it moved. Somewhere in the back, two middle-aged men were talking loudly, their voices drifting from the rear to the front, seemingly wanting the entire bus to join in. They talked about everything from the record-breaking heat of this year's Olympics to the intense US election, and then to the provincial economic policies, their conversation growing more impassioned as they went.
But the conversation closer to Wei Zhi was the whispering of two middle-aged women behind her:
"Another one jumped to their death..."
"Young people these days are getting more and more fragile."
The air was filled with floating droplets of saliva, the smell of sweat, prejudice, silence, and helplessness.
Half of the buses in Jiangdu had already been replaced with new energy air-conditioned models this year, but the route Wei Zhi took still used the old-style buses. She could only rely on opening the windows to reduce the stifling heat. She shoved the window open to its maximum, letting the cool wind blow against her face and leaving the noise inside the bus behind her.
Wei Zhi had thought about dying before, but that was a long time ago. Although her current path was still difficult, she had already seen hope.
The light breeze, carrying the heat of summer, ruffled her long hair. Wei Zhi reached out to tuck it behind her ear.
A platinum engagement ring shone brilliantly on her middle finger.
***
"This is my daughter's planner. It says she wanted to learn to ski this winter—"
"These are tickets for an art exhibition next week. If my daughter bought them, it means she definitely intended to go—"
"This is a new dress my daughter bought. I only received the package yesterday—"
"My daughter even sponsored underprivileged students. She was the most warm-hearted and kind person. How could someone like that... possibly commit suicide?"
Weng Xiuyue, wearing a meticulous business suit and skirt with sharp, professional makeup, was taking "evidence" out of a file bag one by one to explain to the police officer handling the case.
Although she was trying her best to remain calm, the items were trembling slightly in her hands.
"Officer, look, it's obvious, isn't it? My daughter couldn't have committed suicide. You must investigate and find the truth."
Knowing that the things Weng Xiuyue brought wouldn't change anything, Officer Lao Wu, who was in charge of the case, still patiently looked through them. This was likely because he also had a daughter of a similar age.
"Ms. Weng, we've already explained the reasons why we can't file a criminal case. In this incident, your daughter jumped of her own volition. The forensic team found no evidence on the rooftop to prove she was coerced. It wasn't raining that day, and the footprints were very clear. Given the distance between Ji Qikun and your daughter, he had absolutely no opportunity to commit a crime."
Lao Wu paused, then couldn't help but add:
"And—your daughter had a habit of self-harm." This single piece of evidence was more powerful than all the evidence Weng Xiuyue had brought combined.
*Didn't you know before?* He ultimately swallowed that accusatory question.
Even though he didn't speak the words, Weng Xiuyue’s face turned deathly pale as if she knew what he had left unsaid.
Even so, Weng Xiuyue continued to stare intensely at Lao Wu. All the strength in her life seemed to gather in her eyes at this moment, burning like a raging fire.
"She was driven to it... My daughter wasn't like this before. She only changed after she got together with Ji Qikun. Don't you all know? If it weren't for Ji Qikun, my daughter wouldn't have self-harmed, let alone jumped to her death! He drove a person to their death; is he just going to get away with it?!"
"...That's how it is. According to our various investigations, Mei Man did indeed die by suicide." Lao Wu avoided her gaze and her sharp questions. "Ji Qikun’s side has agreed to humanitarian compensation. We've called him here today as well. You can negotiate the specific amount of compensation yourselves. If that doesn't work, you can take it to court—"
"I don't want compensation!"
Weng Xiuyue’s scream shattered her calm facade, interrupting Lao Wu.
She panted heavily, as if a heavy weight were pressing on her lungs. Her bloodshot eyes, visible beneath her makeup, shifted from Lao Wu’s face to Ji Qikun, who had just stepped through the door of the police station.
Ji Qikun also noticed her presence and walked toward her without hesitation.
Because of previous incidents, two young officers immediately stood up and moved closer, ready to prevent any sudden outburst.
Ji Qikun had a few days' worth of stubble on his chin. Ignoring the subtle hints from the young officers, he continued forward until he stood directly in front of Weng Xiuyue.
His reddened eyes were filled with grief as he choked out, "I'm sorry, Auntie. It's all my fault... Whether it's prison or compensation, you decide."
Weng Xiuyue suddenly erupted with immense strength, her fingers clawing as she lunged at Ji Qikun. The two young officers scrambled to restrain her, while Lao Wu hurried to comfort her and issue a warning at the same time.
The items Weng Xiuyue had brought to prove her daughter wouldn't commit suicide fell from the air like snowflakes, mixing together in a mess on the floor.
The small police station was thrown into chaos.
Zhang Kaiyang, who was still a trainee officer and not qualified to participate directly, could only crouch down to pick up the tickets and other items from the floor.
Mei Man’s new dress was yellow with a sunflower print, perfect for summer. But when Zhang Kaiyang had followed Lao Wu on interviews, he heard that Mei Man hadn't worn brightly colored clothes for nearly a year.
The page of the planner that had fallen open showed a sticker of Mei Man making a "V" sign, with "I got into university!" written next to it in colored pens. The lighthearted handwriting captured her mood at the time; Zhang Kaiyang felt as if he could see a bright, cheerful girl.
Not the corpse in the morgue whose face had required significant effort to reconstruct.
She had just graduated from university.
A beautiful life had ended before it could truly unfold.
"He drove my daughter to her death! You all know it!" The voice of the mother who had lost her only child, a mix of despair and rage, echoed through the oppressive air of the police station in a sound that was somewhere between a roar and a wail.
The dignity Weng Xiuyue had spent most of her life maintaining dissolved along with her tears, eyeliner, and foundation.
Even the "old hands" who were currently giving statements couldn't help but stop talking, as if breaking the fragile silence at this moment would be a heinous crime.
When Zhang Kaiyang stood up with the gathered items, the air began to flow again. He handed the organized things to Weng Xiuyue with both hands. She didn't take them; her trembling, tear-filled eyes were fixed straight on Ji Qikun.
The latter offered her a smile.
Pretentious tears still lingered in his eyes, but a cold malice already filled those curving, smiling eyes. Every inch of his skin, even his stark white teeth, betrayed a sense of triumph.
"Auntie, blame me if you want, as long as it makes you feel better..."
That demonic face spoke words of kindness that were the exact opposite of his nature.
This time, Weng Xiuyue briefly broke through the restraint. She wanted to tear his throat open, rip out his windpipe, and crush his heart, but the many hands that immediately followed only allowed her nails to scratch his neck.
***
Wei Zhi stood at the entrance of the avant-garde and fashionable art gallery. She didn't go in immediately but first walked into the convenience store next door.
The air conditioning inside was powerful. She walked familiarly to the "near-expiry discount section" at the very back. After a quick glance, she picked up a carton of pure milk that had expired yesterday.
After paying, she took the elevator to the office area on the second floor of the gallery.
Wei Zhi’s office was in the finance department. She walked in with a smile and greeted the colleagues who had already arrived.
After a few minutes of trivial small talk, she left her bag at her workstation and took the expired milk to the employee break area. She poured it into a coffee cup and warmed it up before slowly walking toward the Art Director’s office at the very end of the second-floor hallway.
"Director Ji, it's me."
After she spoke softly, a deep, magnetic voice came from inside.
"Come in."
She pushed the door open and entered. With her free hand, she closed the door behind her.
Ji Qikun was leaning back in a sofa chair, holding a local newspaper updated today by the administrative department. He wore a light gray suit with a metallic sheen, his long legs crossed, and his black leather shoes were spotless.
When she handed him the cup of milk, he didn't take the cup but instead grabbed her wrist and pulled her down to sit on his lap.
Wei Zhi quickly steadied the milk to keep it from spilling.
He kissed her while taking the coffee cup from her hand and placing it on the coffee table.
Wei Zhi’s breathing gradually quickened. Her free right hand moved to his neck, and she suddenly heard him hiss in pain.
"What's wrong?" she asked quickly.
"...I got hit by a ball while playing squash with you the other day." Ji Qikun pulled his collar up slightly, then wrapped both hands around Wei Zhi’s waist.
"Time really flies. In the blink of an eye, we've been dating for a year."
"And in another blink, we'll be married," Wei Zhi said, lifting his chin to meet his dark eyes.
"I can't wait to imagine how happy that will be," he said.
Ji Qikun cooperated by lifting his chin, looking at her with a half-smile. It was like the claws a kitten extends while stretching—a permitted provocation.
He couldn't help but remember the first time his heart had skipped a beat for her.
She had been sitting at her desk, seemingly hesitating over something. The moment he pushed open the glass door of the finance department, she had looked up with a poorly concealed fluster. Her slightly widened, pure eyes, her lips that quickly loosened and then pressed tightly together, her fair and smooth skin—that fragile yet resilient beauty couldn't be hidden even under her simple, ordinary clothes.
No, it was more accurate to say it made her shine even brighter.
He could hear the blood shouting in his veins.
A butterfly, dampened by rain, yet still struggling to beat its wings.
It made one impatient to tear those wings off.
***
| Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation |
| :--- | :--- | :--- |
| 蓝天小区 | Blue Sky Residential Area | The residential compound where Wei Zhi delivers food. |
| 江都 | Jiangdu | The city where the story takes place. |
| 魏芷 | Wei Zhi | The female protagonist. |
| 王琳 | Wang Lin | Wei Zhi's mother. |
| 魏杉 | Wei Shan | Wei Zhi's father. |
| 魏来 | Wei Lai | Wei Zhi's younger brother. |
| 季琪琨 | Ji Qikun | The male protagonist/antagonist; Wei Zhi's fiancé. |
| 翁秀越 | Weng Xiuyue | The mother of the deceased girl, Mei Man. |
| 老吴 | Lao Wu | A veteran police officer. |
| 张开阳 | Zhang Kaiyang | A trainee police officer. |
| 梅满 | Mei Man | The girl who committed suicide; Ji Qikun's former associate/victim. |
| 貔貅 | Pi Xiu | A Chinese mythical hybrid creature, considered a powerful protector of practitioners of Feng Shui. |
| 杂酱面 | Zha Jiang Noodles | Noodles with soybean paste. |
