Xiao Fengtai was entirely oblivious to his grandmother’s calculations, lost in a philosophical spiral regarding where he and Jiang Tong were headed—as if he alone could truly decide the future for both of them. On the long flight from the United Kingdom back to Singapore, he opened his laptop to do his homework, but his mind drifted off. When he snapped back to his senses, he found he had typed a long string of Jiang Tong’s name across the screen.
Yet the more he felt this way, the more cold and reserved he became in front of Jiang Tong, terrified of revealing even the slightest flaw. Jiang Tong, on the other hand, possessed a heart full of pure, guileless admiration for talent. He looked at Xiao Fengtai the way an old farmer looks at a prize melon from his own garden—the more he looked, the more he liked him, and his attitude grew increasingly warm.
Pity poor Xiao Fengtai; his mind was already in a state of indecision. Every time he resolved to stop his wild imaginings, a gentle word of concern from Jiang Tong would act like spring rain, causing that tiny, stubborn bud of delusion to break through its layers of restraint, sprouting leaves and branches until it grew vigorously. The young man's heart was tormented by this constant cycle of expansion and contraction; to outsiders, he appeared exceptionally cold and silent.
Xiao Fengtai’s torment did not last long. That day, the flute section performed beyond their usual standard, and the orchestra finished rehearsal early. Xiao Fengtai and Jiang Tong had originally agreed to meet at a café near the university, but on a whim, he directed the driver to stop at the school gates and walked slowly toward the biology building to pick Jiang Tong up.
*Maybe I shouldn't have invited him,* Xiao Fengtai thought, falling into a new round of worry. If they ran into someone at school, they would inevitably have to exchange greetings. If his friends saw them, how would he even begin to explain?
He spent the walk lost in these scattered thoughts and soon reached the lab building. Just as he was about to take out his phone, he saw Jiang Tong walking out.
He was arm-in-arm with a pretty girl.
The girl looked to be about Xiao Fengtai’s age, in the prime of her youth. She clung intimately to Jiang Tong, her thick, smooth black hair swaying with her movements. Jiang Tong said something that made her burst into laughter, revealing teeth as white as pearls.
She wore a tight black tank top and short hot pants. Her pale arms, legs, and most of her shoulders were exposed, her curves graceful, drawing frequent glances from passersby.
Her laughter was infectious, making Jiang Tong smile along with her. He reached out to pat the girl's head, his gaze tender.
Campus life never lacked stories of the scholar and the beauty. They were clichés to the extreme, yet there was never a shortage of actors or an audience.
Xiao Fengtai’s head buzzed. When he came to, he was already standing before the pair. He straightened his back, his eyes blazing. He felt like the incarnation of a god of justice, only regretting he did not have a demon-slaying sword to execute Jiang Tong and his paramour on a spiritual level.
Seeing a stranger, the girl reined in her carefree joy, blinking her large, dark eyes as she looked Xiao Fengtai up and down. Intentionally or not, she tightened her grip on Jiang Tong’s arm. The more Xiao Fengtai looked, the angrier he got, wishing his gaze were physical so he could bore a hole through their linked arms.
"Why are you here?" Jiang Tong asked. He remained casual, letting the girl hang onto him with a perfectly natural attitude.
"Why can't I be here?" Xiao Fengtai countered, his voice hoarse, his heart flooded with bitter seawater.
He forced himself to be argumentative to hide his internal weakness. Jiang Tong’s question was plain, yet it cut to the quick—what right did he have to stand before them?
A student begging Jiang Tong for lessons?
A casual acquaintance of a different generation?
Or a fool of a benefactor who shamelessly sent Jiang Tong money every month?
He no longer hesitated, but that only made his sorrow double. It had been a very long time since he had felt such a strong, clear desire—one that made his fingers numb and his heart race. Yet the moment he finally saw this desire for what it was, he was met with its destruction.
"Since you're here, let's go together," Jiang Tong said mildly, used to his outbursts. He let go of the girl's arm and whispered a few instructions in her ear. The girl smiled, tightened the straps of her backpack, and skipped away.
Jiang Tong stepped forward, and Xiao Fengtai followed silently. Though they were walking on flat ground, he felt as if the earth were rising and falling beneath him, like he was treading on surging waves.
"Who is she?" he finally couldn't help but ask.
Jiang Tong blinked. "Huh?"
"That girl just now," Xiao Fengtai forced a smile that looked more painful than crying. "Your new girlfriend?"
Jiang Tong’s expression instantly became complicated.
"How could I have such a young girlfriend?"
"That's my younger sister," he said awkwardly. "Her school is doing an exchange program in Singapore recently. She's staying at my place, so I brought her to see the lab."
