I reached out in my daze but felt nothing; Ye Tan was gone. The morning light was already bright. I squinted for a moment, then remembered I had things to do and scrambled out of bed. First, I swung by Mr. Lu’s room to check on the patient. He was out of danger; after a few days of quiet recuperation, he could be sent back in one piece. Finally relieved, I slipped off to find Qi Qi.
As expected, Qi Qi was in the kitchen, cleaver in hand, mincing filling. To my surprise, Ye Tan was there too. He had removed his usual ink-black gloves and bracers—the ones studded with concealed weapons—and rolled his sleeves up high, revealing a pair of lithe, strong forearms. He was currently kneading dough.
"Master." Ye Tan withdrew his hands from the dough with a hint of embarrassment, rubbing them against his waist.
"It’s fine, keep at it." I leaned in to take a look. "Is A-Tan cooking today too?"
Before Ye Tan could answer, Qi Qi beat him to it with a complaint: "We’re almost out of time, so he came to help. It’s all your fault for making such a racket all night. I couldn't sleep well and woke up late this morning." As she spoke, she dumped the freshly minced meat into a basin, sprinkled in seasonings, thrust a pair of chopsticks into it, and shoved it into my hands. "You’re just in time. Take this and help me mix it evenly."
Ye Tan hurriedly said, "Let me do it."
"Hey, you keep kneading. Let me have some fun." I pulled the basin into my arms, gripped the bamboo chopsticks, and began whisking them in rapid circles. "Like this?"
"Whatever works for you," Qi Qi said, giving me a look of disdain.
Qi Qi took a rolling pin and began working a piece of dough. As I watched, I asked, "By the way, Qi Qi, today is the Winter Solstice. How are we supposed to spend it? Do we need to prepare anything?"
Qi Qi tapped the rolling pin against the dough and frowned. "Aren't we doing it right now?"
I looked at the meat filling in my hands. How was this any different from the potstickers or pan-fried buns we usually ate?
"It’s a holiday. There are sacrifices held outside to pray for favorable weather in the coming year. For ordinary families, it’s a time to reunite with kin, wrap dumplings together, and exchange delicacies with neighbors. In the evening, there are markets and temple fairs." Qi Qi sighed with a 'why-are-you-so-hopeless' tone. "The Winter Solstice is as significant as the New Year. Every single one of you has come to ask me the same thing. Are you all idiots? How have you lived this long?"
Just as I was feeling ashamed, I heard Ye Tan interject, "Miss Qi Qi, you must not be insolent toward the Master."
Thinking about it, in this place, only Ye Tan still seriously regarded me as the Master and maintained the distinction between superior and subordinate. Looking at the others—they were either dim-witted or constantly overstepping. If not for his reminder, I would have forgotten my own character setting.
"Families wrap dumplings together?" I asked, stirring the filling.
Qi Qi replied while rolling out wrappers, "Yes. A normal household has over a dozen people; how could one person finish it all?"
"Like what we’re doing now?" I asked again.
Ye Tan’s movements paused. He glanced at me, then lowered his head and began kneading the dough with renewed vigor.
Qi Qi gave a rare, small smile. "Heh."
Seeing Ye Tan suddenly working so hard, I asked, "A-Tan, how did you use to spend the Winter Solstice?"
Ye Tan continued with his head down. "For Night Flight, the Winter Solstice marked the start of cross-regional intensive training. The three nine-day periods of winter and the three ten-day periods of summer are the times for tempering endurance."
"Endurance? How do you train that?" I asked.
Ye Tan said, "In the summer, we were sent to the desert to be scorched by the sun. In the winter, we sat in meditation by frozen pools on snowy mountains. No food was provided, and we were allowed no rest."
It sounded grueling just listening to it. "You had to soak in water in the winter? Wouldn't that be freezing...?"
Ye Tan said calmly, "It was alright. Actually, more people died in the desert during the summer."
"..." I already knew the trials were cruel, but hearing this made my heart feel even heavier. "Then you must really dislike the Winter Solstice..."
"Mhm, I didn't like it before." Ye Tan’s movements slowed. He raised a hand to tuck a stray lock of hair behind his ear and said softly, "Now, I think it’s very good."
I remembered something else. "Qi Qi, you’re a local from Yangxi, right? If you miss home during the holidays, you can go back. You don't necessarily have to stay here."
Qi Qi let out a scoff. "I was sold. Who would want to go back? Is a holiday only complete if I go back to get a beating?"
I could hear the desolation in her voice; I had clearly touched upon a painful past. "I'm sorry," I said guiltily.
Qi Qi looked back at me and said quickly, "I wasn't talking about you. You... actually, since coming here, life has been much better. I am very grateful. I know I have a bad temper, so if..."
"I'm so hungry! Is there food, Qi Qi?!"
A loud shout drowned out Qi Qi’s increasingly quiet words. The next moment, Ye Xiao poked his head through the half-propped window to beg for food. Seeing me, he ducked back and dashed in through the main door, slapping my shoulder. "Whoa, Boss! Why are you here? You know what? I dreamed about you last night!"
I grew wary. "Why on earth would you dream about me?"
"I didn't want to dream about you either! I wanted to dream about the Leader! Right, Leader?" Ye Xiao swung a hand toward Ye Tan’s shoulder, but Ye Tan dodged, leaving him hitting thin air. Disappointed, he pulled his hand back and continued, "Boss, I dreamed you were hitting me and saying you were going to take me to the temple fair."
...This idiot.
I said solemnly, "It wasn't a dream. I really did go and shout at you in the middle of the night. Today is the Winter Solstice, and there really is a temple fair tonight. We’ll go together then."
Ye Xiao made a terrified expression, clutching his chest. "...Wow, and here I was thinking you were even bullying me in my dreams. It was so annoying, I almost hit back. Luckily I was too sleepy to move... luckily..."
...I feel like Night Flight has a major problem with their education system; the results are terrible.
Hearing this, Ye Tan slowly shifted his gaze to Ye Xiao’s face. His eyes were cold enough to seep ice shards.
Ye Xiao was stared at until he gasped, stammering, "Leader, I was joking. Don't take it seriously."
Ye Tan: "Try joking again?"
Ye Tan’s tone was extremely flat, devoid of any anger, yet even I felt my hair stand on end.
Ye Xiao straightened his spine and stood perfectly still, asking dryly, "Lord Master, are there any orders you require this lowly one to follow?"
As I continued stirring the meat filling, I said, "Qi Qi said everyone should wrap dumplings together for the Winter Solstice. Go call Ye Lan over too."
Ye Xiao grimaced. "You want him to wrap dumplings... isn't that just looking for trouble...?"
"It’s fine. The most important thing for a family is to be together and happy." I radiated a benevolent glow as I bathed him in it. "You can just eat the ones he wraps."
Ye Xiao returned a calm smile, as if facing a final parting. "Thank you for your imperial grace."
Once everyone was gathered, we brought over stools and had a boisterous time playing—no, researching. Fifteen minutes later, everyone except Ye Tan had been kicked out of the kitchen by Qi Qi.
You might not believe it.
The dumplings I wrapped were even uglier than Ye Lan’s.
Ye Xiao kept stuffing them until the dumplings turned into buns, stretching the dough until it burst and leaked everywhere. Ye Lan watched Ye Xiao and also wrapped a round one, then held it out in front of Ye Xiao, waiting for praise.
Ye Xiao educated him solemnly: "Don't copy me. Can't you learn something good? Learn from Qi Qi and the Leader."
Ye Tan was as serious as when he practiced calligraphy—fast and steady. The dumplings he pinched were no different from Qi Qi’s; the pleats were beautifully folded, looking like professional products from a shop. You couldn't tell at all that he was a novice learning for the first time. Ye Lan watched quietly for a while, then managed to produce a passable, ordinary-looking dumpling.
As for me, I could only make dough balls. I felt that dumpling wrappers—things that always stuck together when they needed to be flat, yet refused to stick when you actually needed to seal them—were simply anti-human.
I suspected that Ye Xiao, my sworn enemy, had tampered with my wrappers.
Qi Qi looked at the row of doughy lumps before us and lamented in despair, "There really are people who are worse than a simpleton."
Ye Xiao and I felt no inner turmoil, only a sense of hopelessness.
A-Heng and A-Shu both wanted to go home for the Winter Solstice. Upon learning this morning that they could leave, they had bid their farewells. Only we few—the "Association for the Disabled" with no parents to love us—remained in Jun Garden.
At noon, we forcibly sat several shadow guards, who usually hid in the trees, at the table to eat together. Ye Xiao’s disintegrated dumplings had turned into a pot of soup; they were boiled in a separate pot along with my clumsy dough balls and served to Ye Xiao alone. Everyone else shared the normal dumplings.
...Well, Ye Lan’s dumplings were lucky enough to be in the normal lineup.
Ye Xiao looked at the bowl of mush before him, so happy his eyes grew moist.
Seeing him not moving, Ye Lan pushed his own plate of dumplings toward him, gesturing for him to eat his.
Ye Xiao rejected him solemnly. "This is my fate. You don't need to pity me." He tremulously raised his chopsticks.
Ye Tan suddenly asked him in a low voice, "Can I have one?"
Ye Xiao looked at him blankly, and I was shocked too. "A-Tan, do you have masochistic tendencies?"
Ye Tan lowered his head and stopped talking. He stuffed a dumpling into his mouth, chewed quietly for a while, then couldn't help but ask again, "May I?"
Ye Xiao scooped up a spoonful. "Leader, why be so polite with me? Here, have some of the mush I cooked with my own hands."
Ye Tan frowned. "I don't want your mush. Give me a dumpling. One of the round ones."
So he wanted it for that reason. I immediately felt embarrassed. "You shouldn't, you shouldn't. I’ll practice hard and make them for you once I’ve learned. Why the rush today?"
Ye Tan said softly, "This one is very good."
I tried to stop him a few more times, but as I spoke, I suddenly remembered a term from the tea ceremony: *Ichigo Ichie*. It speaks of a connection that happens only once in a lifetime: the opportunity to sit across from someone and drink tea may only happen once. Even if there is another chance to meet the same person, the tea drunk today will never be the same tea drunk last time.
I always felt these were insignificant trifles and never took them to heart, but I feared he didn't think the same way.
Looking at Ye Tan’s cautious, searching expression, my heart suddenly softened. I slapped my chopsticks down and stood up. "A-Tan, wait here."
I dashed into the kitchen, rolled up my sleeves, and began wrapping in earnest. I ruined several, but gradually I improved, and they began to look somewhat decent.
Ye Tan stopped eating too. He leaned against the doorframe and watched me work without a word.
I held one up and looked it over. "This one looks a bit like it, right? Let me try a few more, I should get it."
Ye Tan: "Mhm."
Qi Qi spat in the courtyard, "Hmph! I wrapped mine so well, yet he won't eat them properly! So dramatic!"
Hearing this, Ye Tan looked even more embarrassed and lowered his head. I chimed in repeatedly, "Exactly, isn't he just being dramatic?"
***
| Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation |
| :--- | :--- | :--- |
| 冬至 | Winter Solstice | A traditional festival; often involves eating dumplings in Northern China. |
| 三九 | Three nine-day periods | The three coldest 9-day periods following the Winter Solstice. |
| 三伏 | Three ten-day periods | The three hottest periods of the summer. |
| 一期一会 | Ichigo Ichie | A Japanese cultural concept (originally from tea ceremony) meaning "once in a lifetime." |
| 扬溪 | Yangxi | A place name. |
| 阿横、阿竖 | A-Heng, A-Shu | Names of minor characters/servants. |
