It was already two in the morning by the time the party at the KTV wrapped up.
A year had passed since graduation, and the class monitor, Liu Shan, had suggested a reunion, leading to this weekend gathering. There were many paths for art students; most of those from well-off families had gone abroad for further studies, while the classmates who remained stayed quite close.
Sima Qiuyun had enjoyed herself more than usual tonight. Having had a bit to drink, she couldn't drive. She scrolled through her contacts, initially intending to find someone to pick her up, but eventually decided to call for a designated driver. The man who arrived was honest and sturdy-looking, and he drove quite steadily. She cracked the window open slightly, letting the wind blow in as the streetlights blurred past one after another.
Her phone rang. Seeing the name on the screen, she silenced it and didn't pick up.
A minute later, three WeChat messages arrived in quick succession:
—Is the party over?
—Do you want me to pick you up?
—Let me know when you’re home safe.
Qiuyun stared at the screen for two seconds but didn't reply.
She idly scrolled through her Moments. The very first post she saw caused the alcohol-induced haze to vanish instantly in the midnight chill.
**Knife and Wood:**
*In this life, fare thee well.*
Attached below was a picture of a single burning candle.
She stared at the post for a long time. Below it, she saw comments from mutual friends she shared with "Knife and Wood"—mostly prayer emojis and messages of "Please accept my condolences."
She understood quickly. She wanted to leave a comment to say something to him, but after hesitating for a long while, she simply followed the pattern and wrote, "My deepest condolences."
"Knife and Wood" was one of her undergraduate professors, a man named Liang He. He had taught their oil painting classes and was well-liked by the students. Near graduation, word had spread that his wife was seriously ill, and the class monitor had even organized a group to visit her in the hospital. At the time, Qiuyun had been busy interviewing out of town for jobs, so she had only sent a monetary contribution. Seeing Professor Liang’s post now, she understood that his wife had likely succumbed to her fate and passed away.
*Ah, life is truly unpredictable,* Qiuyun sighed inwardly.
Professor Liang was a legend within their department, and indeed the entire Academy of Fine Arts. He was in his fifties—or so people assumed—but he didn't have a hint of the "greasy" middle-aged look. His physique and looks rivaled a man in his prime thirties! He had eight-pack abs and a perfect V-taper. He was adept at fitness, traveling, and taking high-quality landscape photography; he simply didn't seem like someone born in the fifties or sixties. The most ridiculous rumors claimed Professor Liang was practicing Taoist cultivation and fasting, or even that he had elven blood! It was said that everyone from the fifty-year-old cleaning ladies to the sixteen-year-old freshmen had either been infatuated with him or "turned" by him. Bold female students from every generation—from the 1980s to the 21st century—had tried to extend an olive branch of love to him.
But Professor Liang was an anomaly, a total insulator. He had a beloved wife, and they had remained childless by choice. Their relationship was so good that he never spared a second glance for any other man or woman.
In short, when Qiuyun was a freshman, she had been thoroughly briefed by the upperclassmen, master’s students, and doctoral candidates: Liang He was the legend of their academy. He possessed the looks of a thirty-year-old and the composure of a fifty-year-old; he could satisfy every desire for a youthful body and every longing for a soulmate. His wife must have saved the entire universe a hundred times in her past life to meet such a man. If you had even a spark of improper thoughts toward Professor Liang, you’d better extinguish them immediately, because countless seniors had already paved the way for you—it was useless. Though he had the fashion-forward edge of the post-00s generation, he guarded a post-60s devotion to love.
Her roommate, Wu Liu, had also proven this theorem. Qiuyun still remembered that summer when Wu Liu had returned after being rejected, crying her heart out.
"Miss, we've arrived."
Qiuyun’s train of thought was interrupted. She snapped back to reality to find the driver had already parked her car downstairs.
"Young lady, don't stay out too late at night. It's not safe," the kind man advised as he prepared to leave.
She looked up at him. He had a kindly face and looked to be about the same age as her father.
She said "Thank you," then looked up at the twelfth floor. That window was pitch black.
The consequence of a hangover was sleeping until the sun was high in the sky.
Qiuyun opened her eyes and fumbled for her phone. Habitually opening WeChat, she saw over a hundred unread messages in the class group chat. With a quick glance, she realized everyone now knew about Professor Liang’s situation.
Just then, Wu Liu’s call came in, sounding frantic.
"Yunyun, did you hear?"
"Hear what..." Qiuyun’s voice was sluggish.
"About Professor Liang!"
"Oh... I know. I saw his Moment last night..." Qiuyun got out of bed and looked for her slippers.
"..." There was silence on the other end.
"Don't overthink it," Qiuyun walked into the bathroom and turned on the speakerphone to get ready. "Professor Liang just lost his wife; he must be devastated. Our class will organize a visit."
"I know," Wu Liu interrupted, her voice low and heavy.
Sima Qiuyun didn't know what to say next.
Liang He was a special name to Wu Liu. During university, the entire dormitory knew about Wu Liu’s feelings for him, but it had remained a one-sided crush that eventually fizzled out. Qiuyun had kindly reminded Wu Liu that Liang He was a teacher and a married man. Even if he weren't married, and even if he looked like he was only in his thirties, his actual age was enough for him to be their father. That was an inescapable fact... She still clearly remembered their conversation back then:
"Liuliu, wake up. It’s impossible. You should pull yourself together; the final exam is the day after tomorrow."
Wu Liu had completely missed the point, looking at her with the melancholic air of a tragic heroine. "Qiuyun, tell me honestly—if he wasn't our teacher, and if you didn't know his age, wouldn't you think he’s incredible?"
"..." But Qiuyun *did* know, so how was she supposed to answer?
"Qiuyun, say something. Just answer me seriously. Setting those factors aside and looking only at the man himself..." Wu Liu was stubbornly fixated. "Oh, right—the first time you saw him! I remember we were together that day! Tell me, what was your impression when you saw him then?"
Seeing Qiuyun’s growing impatience, Wu Liu grabbed her shoulders with both hands. "Qiuyun... can't you just talk to me... I remember it was shortly after we started school. We were wandering around the teaching building when you suddenly got a call from home and walked out..."
Qiuyun pressed a hand to her forehead as her thoughts were forced back in time. That day, she and Wu Liu had eaten together and decided to check out the teaching building. Just as they finished touring Building One, her phone rang. The caller ID showed "Chen Liping." She had been nervous, turning away to answer, but the person on the other end didn't speak—there was only the sound of sobbing. Qiuyun had felt as if she’d been dropped into an ice cave, shivering all over in the tail end of summer.
She had abandoned Wu Liu and rushed outside.
Then came the sharp screech of brakes.
Qiuyun’s center of gravity had already been unsteady; the slight impact sent her tumbling to the ground. Looking up, she saw a man in a dress shirt standing before her, his eyes filled with urgency. A bicycle lay skewed beside him.
He leaned over to look at her legs, asking with concern, "Are you alright?"
Qiuyun had only been bumped; it wasn't serious. She pushed herself up and shook her head. "I'm fine."
"I'm sorry, I didn't have time to brake," he apologized.
Wu Liu, hearing the commotion, came running out. One look at the bicycle and she understood most of what had happened. She supported Qiuyun while sounding a bit angry. *Why ride so fast in school? Are you racing?* Just as she was about to snap, she saw the culprit, and her voice softened involuntarily. "How could you ride... what happened... you... oh..."
The culprit was tall and lean, with thick brows, a high bridge to his nose, large eyes, and long lashes—a total heartthrob. His attire didn't look as youthful as a freshman's; he seemed more mature and steady than their classmates, yet he was on a bicycle, so she guessed he might be a doctoral student.
Qiuyun, however, felt a bit embarrassed. "I was the one who ran out in a hurry. It's not your fault."
Since nothing had really happened—Qiuyun didn't even have a scratch—the handsome man rode off five minutes later. It wasn't until they saw him in class later that Wu Liu whispered a scream: "Isn't that the hunk who hit you the other day? Holy crap! He’s actually our teacher!" Qiuyun hadn't really registered the event, but as soon as Wu Liu mentioned it, she remembered instantly—
Not because of Liang He, but because that was the day her father’s appeal had failed.
So, if you asked Qiuyun what she felt, she couldn't remember her first impression of him. Her "first impression" was already that of Professor Liang standing at the lectern. A tall, handsome teacher who looked like Takeshi Kaneshiro, approachable, a generous grader, and very popular with students. The ageless god, the academy legend.
He was her teacher, a teacher she respected.
After finishing her morning routine, she saw that the class monitor had indeed organized a visit to the professor for the night after tomorrow and was currently tallying the number of people who could attend.
Qiuyun didn't reply. Just as she walked back into the living room, Chen Liping opened the door and returned. She looked like she had pulled another all-nighter; her steps were unsteady and her eyelids were swollen.
Yet, she still remembered Qiuyun’s business.
"Qiuyun, Lin Shaohua was looking for you. He said you haven't been picking up your phone?"
"Oh, I didn't notice."
"Hurry up and call him back. That's no way to string a man along; be careful or he'll just turn around and leave."
Sima Qiuyun rolled her eyes and turned to walk away.
"Hey, hey, what's with the attitude? Everything I say is for your own good. Why are you acting like this? I think young Lin is really quite good this time. Good family, good job, good person, and he treats you well. I'm telling you, stop acting like this. Enough is enough. Hurry up and get yourself married; you're not getting any younger. You'll be twenty-four before you know it..."
Qiuyun suddenly appeared in front of Chen Liping like a ghost, giving her a start.
"I'm going to call him back now. Do you have more to say?" Qiuyun asked.
"Oh, goodness," Chen Liping patted her heart and walked toward the bedroom with a pout. "Scared the life out of me..."
Sima Qiuyun called Lin Shaohua back. She explained that she had returned too late last night and didn't want to disturb him. Lin Shaohua didn't mind and invited her to dinner. Remembering she had some freelance work to finish, Qiuyun apologized and declined. Lin Shaohua then mentioned a colleague had given him two tickets to the opera for the night after tomorrow and invited her to go with him.
Sima Qiuyun’s voice remained gentle, but a trace of fatigue welled up in her heart for no reason. Yes, this back-and-forth of invitations and polite refusals made her feel weary. She suddenly remembered the tally in the group chat, so she apologized and declined again. "A spouse of one of my university professors passed away. I have to go see him the night after tomorrow."
"Then I'll come pick you up when you're finished," Lin Shaohua said.
"..." Qiuyun truly felt too embarrassed to refuse again, so she replied, "Alright then. Thank you."
Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation
--- | --- | ---
司马秋云 | Sima Qiuyun | The female protagonist. Sima is a compound surname.
刘姗 | Liu Shan | The class monitor.
刀与木 | Knife and Wood | Professor Liang He's WeChat handle.
梁禾 | Liang He | The male lead/professor.
吴柳 | Wu Liu | Qiuyun's former roommate.
陈丽萍 | Chen Liping | Qiuyun's mother.
林少华 | Lin Shaohua | A suitor introduced by Qiuyun's mother.
丁克 | DINK | Double Income, No Kids.
辟谷 | Bigu | A Taoist fasting technique associated with the quest for immortality.
