Qiu Yun couldn't tell if Liang He truly had business to attend to or if he was just making an excuse. Her mood was somewhat despondent, and she didn't particularly want company. It was the first day of the Lunar New Year, and people were busy visiting relatives. The shops along the streets were closed. As she silently pushed her dilapidated tricycle, the streetscape felt as desolate as her heart.
Liang He pushed his bicycle alongside her. Seeing how she kept her head down and remained silent after leaving the house, he could more or less understand her state of mind. During festivals, the festive became more festive, while the lonely only felt more isolated. He didn't know how to comfort her. If what Qiu Yun needed right now was an apple, the most he could offer was a crate of pears—no matter how much he gave, if it wasn't what she wanted, it was better to have nothing at all.
And so, he simply walked quietly behind her.
After walking for a while, they passed a street vendor. Qiu Yun suddenly stopped. After pausing for a moment, she turned and said, "Teacher Liang, let me treat you to a sugar painting."
The vendor called out cheerfully, "Come, come! It's New Year's Day. Whether it's a Rat or a Dragon, one for six cents, two for a dime. Shall the young lady go first?"
"Teacher Liang, you go first. What is your zodiac sign?"
"I was born in the Year of the Horse." Liang He parked his bicycle to the side.
"Give it a spin and see if you can land on the Horse," the vendor said.
Liang He found it a bit silly, but he stepped forward nonetheless. With a flick of his finger, the needle on the dial spun several times, wobbling before finally coming to a stop right on the image of the Horse.
"Oh, would you look at that! What luck, young man! Good fortune on the first day of the year—a lucky start!" The vendor scooped a ladle of melted sugar and began drawing a horse on the stone slab. "Your turn, young lady. Let's see if you can borrow some of his luck. What's your sign?"
"I..." Sima Qiu Yun was born in 1994, the Year of the Dog; Qiu Xiaoyun was born in 1970, exactly two cycles older, also the Year of the Dog. "I'm a Dog." With that, she gave the dial a flick. The needle spun and wobbled, pointing at the Rooster one moment and the Monkey the next, finally stopping exactly between the two—landing on nothing at all.
A wave of disappointment washed over Qiu Yun.
The vendor was quick-witted and hurriedly said, "It looks a bit closer to the Monkey to me. How about I make you a monkey? You look like a clever, spirited girl, and monkeys are always smart. Consider it fate."
"A monkey it is, then." Qiu Yun paid the money.
The vendor drizzled the syrup, and a lifelike monkey immediately appeared on the stone slab. He pressed a bamboo stick onto it, gave it a quick scrape with his spatula, and the little monkey stood up. Qiu Yun took it, looked at it for a moment, and took a bite. With a loud *crunch*, half of the monkey's head was gone.
It looked a bit cruel.
"Is it good?" Liang He asked.
"It's alright," Qiu Yun said, the sugar melting in her mouth.
"The prices have gone up for the New Year. Usually, you can get two for six cents," Liang He remarked.
"Oh..." Qiu Yun responded, thinking to herself how cheap prices were in this era. She remembered the tenement building where she lived as a child; there had been a sugar painting vendor at the entrance of the alley back then too. At that time, they were probably fifty cents each. Every time she passed by, she felt a craving, but the vendor was the wife of a worker in Sima Feng’s unit. Whenever she tried to buy one, the woman refused to take her money. But since the woman relied on this for her livelihood, Qiu Yun couldn't just eat for free. In the end, she had to give up, watching enviously as the other children coming home from school swarmed the woman. One by one, they would hold up horses, rabbits, tigers... if someone spun a dragon, it would erupt in cheers. Qiu Yun would watch, her heart full of envy and jealousy.
That envy and jealousy, now that she finally had the sugar in her mouth, slowly bled into a trace of bitterness.
"There was someone who made these at the entrance of my neighborhood too, but my dad wouldn't let me eat them," Qiu Yun said.
"At your neighborhood entrance?"
"Mhm. When I was little, right at the mouth of the alley. Business was great; there was always a crowd of kids."
"On Phoenix Street?"
"..." Qiu Yun didn't answer, continuing her own train of thought. "My dad would make them for me himself when he got home."
"Your father..." This was the first time Liang He had heard Qiu Yun mention her family. "What did he do?"
"He... he worked in technology." Fearing she might say too much and blow her cover, she added, "I'm not entirely sure which factory. But he was very professional at making these sugar paintings." Qiu Yun finished the last bit of sugar and licked the bamboo stick. "I'm a Dog, but the little dogs he drew were always so ugly—they looked like cats or rabbits. But the sugar syrup he mixed was very sweet, sweeter than this stuff in '88 without any additives."
Liang He also finished the last bit of the horse's tail and looked at the bare bamboo stick.
"What year did your father pass away?"
"..." Qiu Yun didn't answer the question. Instead, she said, "My mother left me when I was very young."
"Your mother?" Liang He followed the thread of the conversation.
"Very young. I have no memory of her," Qiu Yun said, which wasn't a lie. Her biological mother had died when she was just over a year old. Her understanding of a "mother" came almost entirely from Chen Liping. If the later events hadn't happened, Chen Liping would still be her mother in her heart.
"Why did she leave? Did she ever come back?"
Qiu Yun shook her head. Passing a trash can by the road, she tossed the bamboo stick inside.
"No," Qiu Yun murmured. "She had her own child. She's never coming back."
*Her own child?*
Liang He was puzzled. He wanted to ask, *Aren't you her biological child?* But seeing Qiu Yun's expression, he couldn't bring himself to be so blunt. It was no wonder she didn't want to mention it; her mother had left so long ago that she had likely started another family. He tried to shift to a lighter topic. "Then you must have been very close to your grandfather?"
Qiu Yun pushed the tricycle forward, pausing slightly before replying, "When I was little, I suppose."
"When you were little?"—there it was again. Liang He couldn't help but glance at her. They say the child is father to the man; perhaps Qiu Xiaoyun's family had been well-off when she was young, allowing her to develop good manners and study habits. That would explain why, even with no one looking after her now, she still displayed such high personal qualities. It was the only answer that satisfied Liang He's doubts.
Unaware of Liang He's thoughts, Qiu Yun looked ahead. The school gates were faintly visible. With someone to walk with, the time and distance seemed shorter. The west gate of the Academy of Fine Arts was simple—just an ordinary iron gate. It reminded her of the factory gates where Sima Teng used to work. Yes, back then, when she was little, her grandfather—Sima Feng's father, Sima Teng—was still healthy. He was one of the founders of the machinery plant. Even after retirement, he enjoyed good benefits and lived in the same compound as the apartment assigned to Sima Feng. The old man had a habit of meeting people for chess in the afternoons. Every time he returned from a game, Sima Teng would bring Qiu Yun some snacks, which made up for the sorrow of not being able to eat sugar paintings at the alley entrance.
Thinking of this, a small smile tugged at the corners of Qiu Yun's mouth. "My grandfather used to buy me candy all the time. White Rabbit—do you know it? Occasionally there was even foreign candy; it was very rare, and I couldn't bear to eat it. My dad wouldn't let me have too much, saying it was bad for a child's teeth and would stunt my growth. Later, my grandfather had some health problems, so... he stopped buying it." Sima Teng had once fallen and broken his leg; after he recovered, he walked with a limp. Before Sima Feng went to prison, he had entrusted Chen Liping to place his father in a nursing home. Chen Liping and Qiu Yun would visit him every month, but later, Chen Liping went less and less. In the end, only Qiu Yun still went.
At this thought, Qiu Yun looked up at the sky and let out a deep sigh. Her slightly moist eyes were quickly dried by the wind.
"Your grandfather has always been a fortune teller?" Liang He was actually quite curious.
Qiu Yun gave an ambiguous "Mhm."
"After your father passed, he raised you to this age by telling fortunes. That couldn't have been easy." Liang He wanted to ask where exactly he told fortunes and what the income was like, but seeing Qiu Yun's silence, he simply said, "He didn't come back for the New Year; perhaps it was for the sake of making a living. You should try to be understanding of the elderly."
Qiu Yun didn't respond, only offering another "Mhm."
After a long while, she added another sentence, as if talking to herself: "Actually, I really miss them."
"Who?"
Qiu Yun sighed softly, a cloud of white mist forming in front of her. Liang He immediately realized his mistake, feeling that his "Who?" had been incredibly foolish. He opened his mouth to take it back or offer some comfort, but in the end, he remained silent.
Qiu Yun did miss Sima Feng. Not just him, but Sima Teng, and even Chen Liping. Regardless of their current relationship, they were once family members who had been kind to her and close to her. On this bustling yet cold New Year's Day, her longing suddenly grew like wild grass. In this world, she was truly alone, like an orphan. No, she was worse than an orphan—an orphan has already lost their parents, while she had family who were separated from her by an unbridgeable chasm, forever out of reach.
At this thought, Qiu Yun sighed again involuntarily.
"Do you know who I went to see on the mountain today?" Liang He said suddenly.
Qiu Yun turned to look at him.
"My father."
"Your father?" Qiu Yun stopped in her tracks, quite shocked. "Uncle Liang, he..."
"He left me many years ago. This is the twelfth year."
"Twelve years?" Qiu Yun did the math. That would be 1976. Liang He would have been around ten years old then. The family photo under the glass on Liang He's desk flashed through her mind, followed by the scene of their lunch today.
"Yes, I was thirteen then."
"How did he... pass away?"
Liang He pursed his lips and said, "He fell ill during the years of turmoil."
"Oh..."
"You're young; there are some things you wouldn't understand." Liang He didn't want to go into detail and deliberately lightened his tone. "But I feel that once someone has been gone for a long time, the sadness fades. Only the beautiful memories remain in your mind. Right?"
Qiu Yun nodded.
"You're a college student now; I don't want to say things like 'they're watching us from heaven'—you wouldn't believe it anyway," he said with a faint smile. "But I think if they were here, they would certainly want us to look forward, to live in the moment, and to be a little happier."
"Yeah..." Qiu Yun took a deep breath. "You're right."
"Sometimes when I look at you, I really don't feel like you're just an eighteen-year-old freshman."
"Really?" Qiu Yun tilted her head. "I'm not eighteen anyway."
"?"
"It's the New Year. I'm nineteen now."
Liang He's eyes crinkled at the corners. "Hearing you talk about your childhood, I think I understand a bit more now."
"Understand? Understand what?"
"Nothing." Liang He looked at her, a smile hidden in his eyes, but he didn't explain. He shifted his grip on the bicycle and added, "Hearing you talk about your childhood has given me some feelings too."
"What feelings?"
"Do you think we're somewhat kindred spirits in our shared misfortunes?"
"How... how on earth are we kindred spirits?"
"There's a bit of it." Liang He hesitated. "I'll tell you when there's a chance in the future."
Qiu Yun didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "Teacher Liang, are you trying to comfort me by comparing who has it worse?"
Liang He laughed. "Why compare that? There are plenty of people in China who have it much worse than us. Today is the first day of the New Year; don't keep dwelling on the past. It's a new beginning, and we should be full of hope."
Qiu Yun laughed too. His last few sentences reminded her of the big-character posters and slogans of this era. Combined with Liang He's expression—part joking, part serious, part solemn, and part endearing—she couldn't quite tell which it was. She only knew that the bit of bitterness in her heart had transformed into the smile on her face.
"Exactly like that. Don't look so miserable," Liang He said naturally. "It's much better when you smile."
Qiu Yun froze, feeling a faint spark like an electric touch in her heart, gone in an instant.
She said, "Teacher Liang, do you know what you looked like just now?"
"What?"
"Like you were grading homework or marking an exam."
"Haha." Liang He thought about it seriously. "Then I'd give you a barely passing 75 just now."
"Only a 75? I thought I'd get a 100."
"It's not that easy to get a perfect score from me."
"What do I have to do to get a 100?" Qiu Yun blurted out.
Liang He's smile deepened, his lips curving into a soft line. "It's hard. There's no set criteria. But if you reach it, I'll let you know."
"Psh..." Qiu Yun dismissed it.
As they spoke, they had reached the girls' dormitory. Liang He asked again, "Do you have to go out again tomorrow?"
"Yes. My classmate and I are swapping locations. She's going to Mount Taibai, and I'm going to Lion's Head."
"Well then, I wish you great prosperity tomorrow."
"Thank you." Qiu Yun parked the tricycle and agreed readily with a smile. Facing Liang He, she saw that his gaze was kind and pure, much like the cleanest pigments freshly mixed from ore. She suddenly realized that perhaps Liang He didn't actually have business at the school; he had likely just been worried about her and wanted to walk her back. To comfort her, he had even told her about his father's passing.
The New Year's sun was bright and honest, and Liang He stood before her so tangibly. Qiu Yun felt a sudden surge of emotion. A sentence rushed to the tip of her tongue, only to be forced back down by her reason. When she spoke, it was just an ordinary, "Goodbye, then."
"Goodbye." Liang He waved.
Qiu Yun went upstairs. The window in the stairwell was bright and clean. She couldn't help but walk over to it. She saw Liang He turn around and head toward the office building. Once he turned the corner of the Second Teaching Building, his figure disappeared.
She returned to her dorm room.
A short while later, Liu Dan returned. The two of them tallied their earnings; both had a successful day, their results nearly identical.
Liu Dan said, "Oh, right. When I was coming up, the dorm lady asked me to bring you a pair of leather gloves."
Qiu Yun was about to start sketching some new product designs. "Leather gloves?"
"Yeah, they're really good quality. Come look."
Qiu Yun walked over and saw a pair of dark leather gloves on the table, lined with fleece. She tried them on; they were very warm, though slightly large.
She found it strange. "Why would the dorm lady give these to me?"
"Someone left them with her to give to you. I happened to be coming up, so I brought them for you." Liu Dan paused, noticing Qiu Yun's expression, and asked with a smile, "You don't know? I can't help but think these look like men's gloves."
"I... I..." Before Qiu Yun could get a coherent word out, she suddenly dropped the gloves and ran to the balcony window. She thought that if she could see that person, even just a silhouette from behind, she would definitely call out to him and tell him the words she had suppressed earlier.
But just as she pushed open the window, a familiar voice came from behind her: "Happy New Year, Qiu Xiaoyun!"
***
| Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation |
| :--- | :--- | :--- |
| 转糖 | Sugar painting | A traditional Chinese folk art using hot, liquid sugar to create figures. |
| 属相 | Zodiac sign | The twelve animals of the Chinese zodiac. |
| 大白兔 | White Rabbit | A famous brand of Chinese milk candy. |
| 狮子头 | Lion's Head | A local place name, likely a hill or landmark. |
| 太白山 | Mount Taibai | A local place name. |
| 邱晓云 | Qiu Xiaoyun | The name of the person whose body the protagonist occupies. |
