The tea leaves swirled in the cup before slowly sinking, replaced by a rising mist of steam that drew the eye.
As Jin Yan processed the information Zhu Di had shared, his vision seemed to blur behind that same mist.
"Dr. Zhu, you just said that Zhou Shu’s state is much better this time than before." Jin Yan looked up, the corners of his eyes slightly reddened. "Then... what was he like before?"
"Withdrawn, cold, irritable, and taciturn." Zhu Di listed four negative traits in one breath, causing Jin Yan to frown.
Seeing this, Zhu Di offered a comforting word. "In truth, it was a self-defense mechanism, though it was the sub-personality he was protecting." He paused for a few seconds before continuing. "To protect Zhou Duo from harm, he chose to close himself off, refusing to let anyone get close."
*To close himself off, refusing to let anyone get close...*
For a Movie King in the entertainment industry, this was an almost impossible feat. Yet Zhou Shu had grown accustomed to this persona, protecting Zhou Duo alone all these years.
Just as he had been protecting Jin Yan...
How could there be such a person? They had known each other for twenty-three years, yet Jin Yan was still discovering new depths to his kindness.
"By the way, if I may ask a personal question," Zhu Di interrupted Jin Yan’s silence at the appropriate moment. "You mentioned earlier that you’ve registered your marriage. May I ask what your gender is?"
"I am an Enigma."
Zhu Di froze for a moment upon hearing the answer. After a brief hesitation, he spoke again. "Would you mind telling me when your second differentiation occurred? Zhou Shu told me before that you left after differentiating into an Alpha."
"About two years ago," Jin Yan said. "I was alone in Country A at the time."
"From what I understand, for an Alpha to undergo a second differentiation into an Enigma is like surviving a trial by fire. Many don't make it through," Zhu Di said, his tone tinged with sympathy.
Jin Yan nodded slightly. "I was lucky. A friend was nearby, and I was taken to the hospital shortly after it started."
"Under what circumstances did you differentiate?" Zhu Di asked. "Did you encounter any external stimulus?"
Jin Yan narrowed his eyes, thinking back. "It wasn't really a sudden stimulus. My mind was occupied with the same person as always." He paused, then added, "It’s just that I was at the seaside that day."
The scent there had been exceptionally similar to a certain someone.
Zhu Di pondered for a moment and then chuckled. "The bond between you two is truly profound. One split off a second personality for the other, while the other differentiated into a fourth gender for him."
"You mean... my differentiation into the fourth gender was because of my brother?" Jin Yan’s eyes widened slightly, his voice rising with agitation.
Zhu Di nodded, then asked, "Have you heard of the Pygmalion Effect?"
"I have." Jin Yan calmed down quickly. "What is desired is what is obtained."
"Yes. What the heart desires, the soul attains."
Jin Yan was stunned, looking up at him.
Zhu Di refilled his tea and continued to explain. "What is in the mind becomes the wish; when the wish deepens into an obsession, it becomes the reality. Your marriage and the fruition of your relationship now were inevitable events. In your sub-consciousnesses, you both wanted to deepen this bond. Neither of you could accept the result of both being Alphas at the time, so that catalyzed these psychological and physical reactions."
"For instance, dissociative identity disorder and second differentiation," Zhu Di said, taking a sip of tea.
Jin Yan digested this for a few seconds and smiled faintly. "Dr. Zhu, your theory sounds more like something a philosopher would say."
Zhu Di didn't deny it, replying candidly, "Philosophy has always encompassed psychology; they simply differ in scope. A psychiatrist’s job is to help organize a person’s psychological and mental state, or to provide guidance." His gaze fell on Jin Yan’s face. "You are very suited to using philosophical theories for your mental organization."
"Then I’ll take that as a compliment from Dr. Zhu." Jin Yan paused for a few seconds, took a sip of tea, and glanced at the time on his phone. "But did Dr. Zhu keep me here because there’s something else you wanted to tell me?"
"It is time to get to the main point, otherwise Xiao Shu will get anxious waiting," Zhu Di said. "Xiao Shu used to avoid letting me come into contact with Zhou Duo; instead, it was my daughter who had a good relationship with him. He seemed terrified that if he told me too much, Zhou Duo would disappear. So he often avoided me and intentionally skipped his follow-up appointments."
He sighed. "He truly treasures this Omega personality."
"Yes, I know..." Jin Yan’s throat tightened, and his voice dropped. "Once, when Zhou Duo came out, he told me he felt like he was about to disappear."
Zhu Di looked slightly startled. Jin Yan nodded and continued, "He said the more bonds there are between me and Zhou Shu, the more at peace he feels, and the less frequently he will appear. But he doesn't know when he will vanish completely."
As Jin Yan spoke, his brow furrowed, unable to hide his sorrow.
"You didn't tell Xiao Shu, did you?" Zhu Di asked.
Jin Yan shook his head, feeling somewhat lost. "I don't want to keep it from him, but I don't know how to tell him."
"Xiao Shu actually feels it in his heart as well. Otherwise, he wouldn't be so anxious this time. It’s just that he’s unwilling to believe it, so he rushed here to get an answer from me," Zhu Di said. "Everything needs to wait until Zhou Duo appears before a conclusion can be made. If what Zhou Duo said is true, then that result must be told to Xiao Shu by Zhou Duo himself. That way, it will be easier for him to accept."
"I’m afraid Zhou Shu won't find it easy to accept at all." Jin Yan knit his brows, his hands clenching. "Dr. Zhu, is there any other way? For example, letting them continue to coexist harmoniously like this?"
"Dissociative identity disorder is a manifestation of psychological trauma. No matter how gentle the sub-personality is, it will affect the mental state of the primary personality. Coexisting harmoniously without end is likely not a good solution," Zhu Di said tactfully.
After a long while, Jin Yan regained his composure. He finished the tea in his cup and looked down. "I understand. Thank you, Dr. Zhu."
"No need to be so polite. I’ve never really considered Xiao Shu just a patient." Zhu Di looked at Jin Yan with a kind gaze, his eyes filled with the joy of an elder. "Seeing Xiao Shu so happy today puts my mind at ease. You must believe that as long as you are there, no matter what the final result is, Xiao Shu will slowly come to accept it."
"Alright, I’ll remember that." Jin Yan nodded and stood up. "Then I’ll be going. Thank you for your trouble, Dr. Zhu."
"You're welcome. Go on, Xiao Shu must have been waiting a long time."
After saying goodbye to Zhu Di, Jin Yan walked downstairs alone. The sunlight shining through the glass onto him helped evaporate some of the unease in his heart.
The conversation with Zhu Di had left Jin Yan momentarily unsure of how to process everything.
That Omega, who had split off because of him, was the person his brother wanted to protect most—the version of himself who had successfully differentiated into an Omega at eighteen.
It was a convoluted problem, a recurring cycle, a knot difficult to untie.
That "self" had accompanied Zhou Shu through five years of lonely, unbearable days and nights.
He was grateful to Zhou Duo, and he had no right to make any decisions for Zhou Shu.
However, if the Pygmalion Effect held true, then the day they truly established a marking relationship would likely be the day Zhou Duo disappeared...
Jin Yan thought of this and gave a bitter smile.
Fate truly loved to present him with difficult problems that required such peculiar logic to solve.
He adjusted his emotions and let out a breath. When he reached the building's entrance, he saw Zhou Shu standing in front of a coffee shop across the street, surrounded by several people.
It looked like enthusiastic fans had recognized Zhou Shu and were asking for his signature.
Jin Yan smiled and was about to walk over, but his footsteps stopped dead in their tracks.
No, he couldn't go over...
He couldn't let others see Zhou Shu walking with someone. He couldn't give people any ammunition to use against Zhou Shu.
Just as Jin Yan was about to step back to the side, Zhou Shu looked up, and their eyes met.
Just as Zhou Shu was about to say something, he saw Jin Yan squeeze out a smile and shake his head at him.
Zhou Shu was puzzled. Jin Yan waved the phone in his hand, and Zhou Shu moved slightly to the side to answer the call.
"Brother, I’ll wait for you at the corner of this building."
Jin Yan kept his gaze on Zhou Shu from across the street. Zhou Shu could even clearly see the shape of his mouth as he spoke, and the suppressed, forced smile on his face.
But he simply couldn't reach out and touch him through the crowd.
Consequently, his heart was gripped tightly, making it difficult to breathe.
Zhou Shu politely bid farewell to the fans and followed Jin Yan’s path to the corner of the building.
Jin Yan was indeed waiting for him there.
He was about to reach out and hug the person in front of him when he saw Jin Yan take a step back.
"Brother, I’m afraid the fans haven't gone far. I don't want them to photograph you." Jin Yan’s voice trembled slightly at the end. Zhou Shu knew he was trying his best to restrain himself.
"Alright. You go first, I’ll follow you." Zhou Shu’s voice also became strained.
They walked along the small path one after the other, separated by the distance of a single body. It was unclear who this distance was meant to appease.
During this time, they didn't exchange a single word, and the air circulating between them turned somewhat bitter.
It wasn't until they got into the car that, the moment the door closed, Jin Yan could no longer suppress the bitterness and pain in his heart. He couldn't wait to pull Zhou Shu into his arms.
"You've grown up; now you won't even hold my hand outside." Zhou Shu rubbed Jin Yan’s hair, his tone slightly coquettish.
Jin Yan didn't answer; he simply tightened his grip.
"It’s Brother’s fault for making you feel wronged." Zhou Shu kissed the side of Jin Yan’s hair and said softly, "I’m sorry. It’s Brother’s fault that our Yan Yan doesn't even dare to hold hands in public."
Hearing this, Jin Yan slowly closed his eyes, momentarily unable to soothe the emotions in his chest.
Yes, he felt very wronged. Being unable to embrace Zhou Shu in the sunlight made his heart ache to the point of suffocation.
Fortunately, Zhou Shu comforted him tirelessly, just like he used to when Jin Yan acted spoiled as a child.
"You knew I smoked," Jin Yan said, his voice low and as steady as he could manage.
Zhou Shu froze. Immediately, the years of bitterness buried deep within his soul flooded his mind, leaving him unsure of what to do.
Jin Yan didn't rush him, quietly waiting for Zhou Shu to answer.
"Yes, I smelled it," Zhou Shu said after a long silence. "I stayed inside for a long time that day."
"But you were clearly afraid..."
Since their reunion, the two had never bared their hearts to discuss the events of those years—neither Zhou Shu’s sub-personality nor Jin Yan’s fourth gender differentiation.
They had a tacit agreement not to revisit those foolish past events where their own awkwardness had hurt the other. Now that it was out in the open, the bitterness suppressed for five years surfaced along with it.
"It wasn't so scary when I could smell your scent." Zhou Shu deliberately kept his tone light, wanting to make it sound less heavy. "It was still Brother’s fault. I shouldn't have let you go back then."
Jin Yan shook his head, his heart tightening along with his brow in a dull ache.
"I thought you would never be able to accept an AA relationship..." Jin Yan finally admitted defeat. It was as if he could no longer hold it in. Nestled in the crook of Zhou Shu’s neck, he said, "Brother, I’m very selfish. I didn't want to stay at home and hear news about you anymore, and I didn't want to see you eventually bring home some petite, lovely Omega and have me call them 'Sister-in-law'." His voice weakened to a whisper at the end. "I was too selfish..."
"Be good, Yan Yan. Don't say that." Zhou Shu kissed him, holding him tightly, unwilling to let go for even a second. "I could tell you were intentionally avoiding me during that time. You barely replied to my messages and stopped clamoring for me to return to Haicheng."
He sighed and gave a bitter smile. "At the time, I thought you had fallen for another Alpha after your differentiation, which is why you asked me if I could accept an AA relationship." He shook his head, sounding self-deprecating and amused. "I was the foolish one."
"Brother?" Jin Yan lifted his face to look at him in slight surprise, his voice filled with disbelief. "You... what did you say?" He was so flustered that the corners of his mouth twitched, and he could only repeat in a trembling voice, "What are you saying? How could I possibly like another Alpha?"
"I know, I know," Zhou Shu repeated, kissing his eyes. "But even though I knew, I didn't dare to gamble, even if there was only a one-in-ten-thousand chance."
"I wasn't confident."
After Zhou Shu said this, Jin Yan stared at him with wide eyes, his lips trembling slightly.
The person who shared the Pygmalion Effect with him, the person who had shared a deep bond with him since the day he was born, was now baring his heart’s most intimate words. He was right there in front of him, looking at him with eyes more beautiful than the sun, moon, or stars.
"You’re too wonderful, Yan Yan." Zhou Shu smiled and brushed away the moisture at the corners of Jin Yan’s eyes. "My Yan Yan is too beautiful. Brother was afraid that if I didn't keep a close eye on you for even a moment, you’d be snatched away by someone else."
***
| Chinese | English | Notes/Explanation |
| :--- | :--- | :--- |
| 皮格马利翁效应 | Pygmalion Effect | A psychological phenomenon where high expectations lead to improved performance; here used to describe "wish fulfillment" through obsession. |
| Enigma | Enigma | A rare gender in some ABO settings, often capable of turning Alphas into Omegas. |
| 二次分化 | Second Differentiation | A rare second change in a person's secondary gender (e.g., Alpha to Enigma). |
| AA恋 | AA Romance / AA Relationship | A romantic relationship between two Alphas. |
| 周朵 | Zhou Duo | The name of Zhou Shu's Omega sub-personality. |
| 普鲁斯特效应 | Proust Effect | The phenomenon where scents trigger vivid memories. |
