That morning, I charged back into the dorm and pulled Lao Qi, who had just rolled out of bed, and Gao Dapang, who was still under the covers, into a massive hug. Lao Qi, his hair looking like a literal bird’s nest, stared at me in a daze, asking what kind of morning madness had possessed me. Gao Dapang clutched his quilt bashfully, squeaking, "Wheat, are you finally making a move on your roommates?"
"It’s nothing," I said. "I just think you two are the most adorable straight guys I’ve ever met!"
In truth, I just wanted to say thank you. Thanks, brothers. Thanks for knowing my orientation and still treating me like one of the guys.
I freaking love you guys!
The entire day, whether I was training or eating, I was completely in the zone, my fighting spirit soaring. It’s strange how humans are such contradictory creatures. When you’re facing the world’s malice alone, you feel as fragile and hopeless as a bean sprout. But if there’s even one person standing by you, it’s enough to turn you into Iron Man in an instant.
That evening, I got a call from my mom. She said she and my dad were coming this way with a tour group and wanted to drop by to see me.
I had just barely gotten a taste of what love felt like, and already my parents were rushing over to see me. The coincidence made me feel a bit shy. I bashfully asked when they’d arrive so I could pick them up, but as soon as Mom said "Sure," I heard my stubborn, sharp-tongued old man barking from the other end of the line: "The kid has to train! If he’s training, he should focus on training. Why’s he picking us up? We have legs, don't we? We know how to walk!"
You see the temper on this man? It was a perfectly kind sentiment, but coming out of his mouth, it sounded like a reprimand. I had no choice but to agree, saying I’d meet them at the main gate instead, otherwise they might not be able to get in or might lose their way once they did.
The next day, they arrived even earlier than the time they’d given me. I was in the middle of a shower and only saw the three missed calls when I got out—all from ten minutes prior. Terrified of getting a lecture from my dad, I didn't even dry my hair. I just threw on a T-shirt and jeans and sprinted downstairs.
I didn't find them at the main gate. Instead, I spotted them in the training base’s garden, walking alongside Ling Xiao.
I watched as Ling Xiao led my parents toward me from the garden. I wanted to call out, but I didn't want to startle them. I had never seen Ling Xiao’s parents come to visit him. I could only guess what he was like around elders based on his attitude toward Coach Hu—outwardly obedient and flawless, but inwardly quite rebellious and proud. I never expected to see him strolling through the base with my parents, looking not at all like a rebel, but more like their son than I was.
I watched him intentionally slow his pace to match theirs, pointing out the locations of the training hall and the dorms. Because he was so tall, he would tilt his neck slightly when listening or speaking to them. Even if he had to repeat something three times, he didn't look the least bit impatient. He looked like a model high school student.
This guy wasn't rebellious in front of parents at all. He was exactly the kind of "perfect son from next door" that all the neighbors would rave about.
Mom, being Mom, sensed my presence even though I hadn't made a sound. She called out from a distance, "Wheat!"
"Coming!" I shouted, rushing toward them. Ling Xiao stared at my forehead for a moment and said, "You should take your parents to sit in the training hall. It’s a bit hot out here." I quickly replied, "Yes, Captain!"
My stubborn, hot-tempered dad didn't forget to give his thanks: "Sorry for the trouble, Xiao Ling." I have never seen my dad look so pleasant toward me in my entire life! But "Xiao Ling"? Hahahaha, what the hell!
I watched Ling Xiao’s retreating back as he walked away. To my surprise, he turned his head back toward me halfway. They say those who look back are the ones who truly love you! My heart felt like it had been dipped in honey, and I waved at him vigorously. Ling Xiao simply pointed to his own head. Only then did I remember I had just given my hair a haphazard rub with a towel before running out...
Utterly mortified, I tried to ruffle my hair into some semblance of order while my mom pulled at me, complaining. She said they arrived early, I hadn't picked up my phone, and they couldn't get in—luckily, my captain had passed by and brought them in...
By the time I looked back again, Ling Xiao was gone.
"He said you guys had just finished morning training and you were probably in the shower, so he showed us around. Hey, Wheat, tell me, is that the one you used to always watch on TV during matches..."
Dad cut her off: "Of course it is. That’s Ling Xiao!" Then he gave me a look of disappointment. "Look at him. So polite and well-mannered..."
Holy crap, Ling Xiao being praised for being "polite and well-mannered"? The sun must be rising in the west! I was secretly gloating inside, but then a strange thought hit me. I had never seen Ling Xiao act so gentle toward anyone. Could it be because they were *my* parents?
Hahahaha, no way. Qiao Mai, you really have a wild imagination!
My parents had known of Ling Xiao for a long time, of course, and his popularity in our household had always been higher than mine. My mom is a total visual stan; every time I watched Ling Xiao’s matches, she’d sit with me and gush over the TV, critiquing his eyes one moment and his nose the next. Once he put on the mask and started fencing, she’d lose interest and go back to scrolling through WeChat. As for my dad, every time Ling Xiao had a match, he’d ask if I could beat him. Before I could even open my mouth, he’d look at "Xiao Ling" on the screen, shake his head, and say, "I don't think you've got a chance."
That day, Coach Hu made an exception and let me skip afternoon training. I had lunch with my parents in the cafeteria and went shopping for a bit. When it was time to return to the team in the evening, we reached their hotel, and a sudden impulse seized me. I grabbed my mom and asked, "Mom, do you like Ling Xiao?"
"I do! The boy is handsome, has a sweet personality, and he’s great at fencing. What’s not to like?" Mom was a simple soul. After saying that, she touched her face regretfully. "Ah, I should have asked for a photo with him..."
I smiled. Yeah, what’s not to like? You better remember those words, Mama Qiao. When I bring him home to be your son-in-law later, you aren't allowed to be dissatisfied!
***
Knowing that Ling Xiao wasn't repulsed by homosexuality and that my parents were his die-hard fans, I could no longer suppress the urge to confess. However, I had zero experience in this department. Since I was confessing to a guy, there weren't many "teaching materials" to go by. To be safe, I decided to consult Auntie Tian, who was far away across the ocean. She probably had more experience with confessing to men than I did.
I vaguely hinted to Auntie Tian that I had someone I liked. After hearing this, Auntie Tian went wild, practically dragging the information out of me, asking which "poor soul" was the target of my affection...
I glared at my phone and told her I’d let her know once he actually became a "poor soul." After circling around the topic with her for ages and flattering her endlessly, Auntie Tian finally started her lecture.
"I might not have more experience than you when it comes to confessing to guys. In all my years, it’s always been guys confessing to me. Besides, even if I could give you tips, they’d be for a girl chasing a guy. When a girl chases a boy, it’s as easy as piercing a veil. You just write a confession letter, hand it over bashfully, and the ball is in his court. That’s the 'Master’s way' of chasing. It definitely won't work for you."
The Master’s way obviously wouldn't work, because the person I was chasing was the real Master here. I asked, "Is there a 'Servant’s way'?"
"There is. That’s how a man chases a woman. It really tests your 'boyfriend power.' You have to work hard to create all sorts of romantic scenarios. For example, if you want to chase someone on your team—now, don't get excited, nephew, I’m just using an example! If you don't like it, I can use a different one. How about chasing a male colleague?"
I thought about it. "Let’s stick with that example."
"Which example~?" Auntie Tian’s voice over the phone was dripping with mischief.
"The teammate one!!" Dammit, my face was practically cooked through!
"Oh ho ho, then let’s go with that. To chase a teammate, you could book the entire cafeteria. Your cafeteria isn't that big, right? If you don't have the money, you can act cute with the chef and get him to let you hang a banner or some balloons. Then order a three-tier cake, push it out covered in candles to celebrate his birthday, and then walk out with a bouquet of flowers to confess on one knee! Basically, you want the whole world to know you’re chasing him! It sounds cliché, but girls eat up romantic drama. As long as she doesn't hate you, she’ll definitely fall for it! Though, since your target is a man, the success rate might be a bit lower..."
Ridiculous! How could I let the entire National Men’s Fencing Team know I was chasing Ling Xiao? That would be a guaranteed headline. Before Ling Xiao could even be moved, Coach Hu would probably hack me to pieces.
"Booking the place won't work. It’s too high-profile. Are there any other low-profile 'Servant' methods?"
Lao Qi and Gao Dapang, who had been out for a walk, came back and overheard me asking Auntie Tian about confessions on the balcony. They both jumped in to offer advice.
Lao Qi said that back in the day, he had dressed up in a Minion costume on his girlfriend’s birthday to deliver a package. He brought a huge bouquet of roses and a confession letter, and that’s how he succeeded. He said that even if he’d been rejected, it would have avoided the awkwardness. He then gave me a worried look. "But you’re a gay guy, so it might not apply."
I thought about it. Ling Xiao definitely wouldn't like Minions or Pikachu or stuff like that. I could probably wear a suit of Iron Man armor to give him flowers... wait, he might not like flowers either. Maybe a Bumblebee action figure! Holy crap, if Iron Man gave me a Bumblebee figure, I’d be moved to tears!
Dapang said he’d never been in a relationship, but there was a guy in his high school who drew a giant portrait of Gintoki—the girl’s favorite character—in the snow under her dorm window, complete with a speech bubble saying "Aishiteru." Apparently, he practiced for a long time, but the effect was surprisingly good.
This was actually inspiring. If Ling Xiao didn't read manga, I could draw Batman. Yeah, that’s a good idea. Batman and Robin are a pair. If I drew Batman to confess, he might get it! And Coach Hu definitely wouldn't understand that move!
My mind was filled with all sorts of plans. They all seemed plausible, and I wanted to try them all just to see Ling Xiao’s reaction. But on second thought, none of them were usable. I could buy a Bumblebee figure, but how would I get into an Iron Man suit? I’d look like a total idiot. And to draw Batman and Robin in the snow, I’d have to wait until winter!
"Which poor soul did you actually fall for?" Lao Qi asked. "Why don't you just ask him what he likes and then play to his interests?"
What did Ling Xiao like? I really didn't know. Cats? Fish? All I knew was that he liked fencing.
Gao Dapang said from the side in a dark, knowing tone, "You didn't fall for our Captain, did you?"
Before he could even finish the sentence, I jumped up and gave him a thorough thrashing.
How could you just blab out a top-secret like that?!
***
