Chapter 62 - The Years Between Us
Wen Yan believed that Su Jingming suffered from a profound lack of security. Since their youth, he had poured his efforts into mending those jagged gaps in Su Jingming’s heart, trying to provide the stability the other boy so desperately craved. He could mimic Su Jingming’s mannerisms, adopt his habits, and even mirror his outlook on life, but he could never truly experience the trials Su Jingming had endured alone.
During those five long years of separation, Wen Yan had lived with a calculated deliberation. Every action he took and every word he uttered passed through a rigorous internal filter: *If it were Su Jingming, what would he do?* It was a form of devotion that bordered on obsession, a way to keep the ghost of his lover close when the man himself was gone.
Su Jingming took several deep breaths, his mind a chaotic whirl of emotions. Wen Yan’s words had stripped away his composure, leaving him feeling exposed and adrift. Over the years, he had carried a heavy burden of regret and resentment—a guilt so dense it felt like a physical weight pressing against his ribs.
Wen Yan sighed softly, the sound fluttering against Su Jingming’s ear. He tightened his grip on the smaller man’s waist, his voice steady yet laced with an underlying plea. "I have enough patience to wait for you," he murmured. He paused for a heartbeat before adding, "But please, don't make me wait too long."
"I won't," Su Jingming whispered, clutching the fabric of Wen Yan’s shirt. He leaned his forehead against Wen Yan’s chest, closing his eyes to focus on the rhythmic, grounding thrum of the other man’s heart. "We’ve already lost five years. If we wait any longer, you’ll be an old man."
Wen Yan arched an eyebrow, a flicker of his youthful, mischievous spirit returning to his gaze. He suppressed a smile, his voice dropping to a low, intimate register. "Little Hero."
"Hmm?"
"Shall we get married?"
Su Jingming froze. "???"
*Why do you say that as casually as if you’re asking what’s for dinner?*
Having spent his recent years buried in the study of clinical psychology, Su Jingming was somewhat out of touch with the rapid shifts in the outside world. Wen Yan reached into his bag and produced a document—a copy of the Marriage Law that had been amended two years prior. It was printed on standard A4 paper, with certain sections bolded and enlarged for emphasis.
"The law was changed a couple of years ago," Wen Yan explained, his tone adopting a trace of his old, roguish charm. He pointed specifically to a highlighted line. "It now recognizes same-sex marriage. You don't need to worry about the rest for now. Just look at this line. Read it word by word. If there’s anything you don’t understand, feel free to ask your legal counsel."
Su Jingming remained silent for a moment, actually taking the paper and reading it with the intensity of a student facing a final exam. He didn't dare miss a single punctuation mark. Finally, he looked up, blinking. "What was your major in university again?"
"Law," Wen Yan replied, frowning slightly. "Is there a problem?"
"It’s just... do you always carry a copy of the Marriage Law with you?"
Wen Yan coughed, momentarily losing his professional poise. "That’s not the point. The point is, do you understand what it says?"
Su Jingming nodded slowly, though a lingering doubt remained. "Why did you choose that major? If I remember correctly, during that New Year's dinner at your house, your father wanted you to study finance."
Wen Yan went quiet for a few seconds, his gaze drifting toward the window. "...The divorce rate is quite high these days," he said eventually, his voice dry. "Litigation is a lucrative business."
***
Su Jingming spent the first two days of his return to Liangcheng almost entirely sequestered with Wen Yan. By the time he realized he ought to contact his old friends, Ren Wei was already on the verge of a breakdown. When the call finally connected, Ren Wei’s voice practically exploded through the speaker.
"Su Jingming! You bastard! You finally decided to crawl back to us?!"
Su Jingming instinctively pulled the phone away from his ear.
"If you hadn't come back soon," Ren Wei continued, his voice thick with exasperation, "I think Wen Yan would have actually lost his mind."
Hearing this, Su Jingming glanced over at Wen Yan, who was currently sitting at the desk, focused on a thick legal case file.
"Setting that aside," Ren Wei grumbled, "where the hell have you been? I asked everyone I knew to look for you, but there wasn't a single trace."
"I lived on campus during high school and went to university in City A," Su Jingming explained. The implication was clear: he had rarely been around his mother, Cheng Hui, making it nearly impossible for Ren Wei to track him down through family connections.
"Oh," Ren Wei muttered. "So where are you staying now? That old apartment of yours has been empty forever. Are you going back there? And have you seen Wen Yan yet? Let me tell you, he’s basically turned into a carbon copy of you. Last time we were out, Song Yifei was drinking and cursing your name, calling you a 'femme fatale' who ruined a perfectly good man!"
Su Jingming opened his mouth to protest, but he caught the sound of a faint, stifled chuckle. He shot a glare toward the desk. Wen Yan cleared his throat twice, his expression turning unnaturally solemn as he flipped a page in his file.
Ren Wei, unfortunately, possessed ears as sharp as a hawk's. "Is there someone else there?! Is that a man's voice?! Su Jingming, I really underestimated you! You just got back and you're already fooling around? Has your conscience been eaten by dogs over the last five years?!"
Su Jingming glared at Wen Yan and hissed into the phone, "Are you a dog? How is your hearing this good?"
"You're calling me a dog?! Fine, insult me all you want, but you just admitted there's a man with you! Su Jingming, oh Su Jingming, I am truly disappointed in you!" Before Su Jingming could get a word in edgewise, Ren Wei hung up with practiced efficiency.
Su Jingming stared at the darkened screen, questioning his entire existence. *Why does Ren Wei make me sound like a heartless playboy?*
He was about to discuss this grievance with Wen Yan when the phone rang again.
"Where are you staying? I'm coming over," Ren Wei demanded.
Su Jingming gave him the address of the hotel. Ren Wei grunted a "Got it" and hung up again.
Su Jingming pursed his lips and looked at the man at the desk. "Tell me... do I seem like a scumbag to you?"
Lawyer Wen didn't even look up from his documents as he nodded. "Yes. A scumbag who specializes in stealing people's hearts."
Su Jingming choked. *Where did he learn these cheesy pick-up lines? And why do they actually sound good?*
Ren Wei arrived with impressive speed. He had picked up a spread of takeout and a few bottles of beer on the way. When Su Jingming opened the door, both men froze, the air between them thick with the weight of five years.
The friend from his youth looked much the same, yet different. Ren Wei’s throat bobbed. "Ming-ge..."
Su Jingming took in Ren Wei’s appearance: a black t-shirt, athletic pants, and flip-flops. His skin was several shades darker than before, and his arms were corded with solid muscle. "Did you actually become a P.E. teacher?" Su Jingming asked, his voice filled with genuine curiosity.
Ren Wei’s emotional reunion was instantly derailed. He shoved past Su Jingming, grumbling, "Let me see which 'wild man' you're shacking up with in this hotel... If I catch him, I'm telling Song Yi—"
His words died in his throat. Ren Wei stood in the middle of the room, clutching bags of food, staring at Wen Yan.
Wen Yan looked up and offered a faint, elegant smile that looked exactly like his eighteen-year-old self. "Ren Wei, long time no see."
Ren Wei’s grip loosened, and the bags of food and beer hit the floor with a dull thud. Su Jingming sighed, picked them up, and set them on the side table.
Ren Wei’s finger trembled as he pointed back and forth between the two of them. "You! You guys! You!!" His mouth worked, but he couldn't form a coherent sentence.
Su Jingming leaned against the table. "What about us? Aren't you happy to see your old classmates? Ah, are you still upset about the time you lost to Wen Yan in the three-thousand-meter race? You really did hold that grudge for a long time."
Wen Yan added fuel to the fire with a mock-apologetic tone. "My apologies. I didn't realize that loss had such a lasting impact on you. Had I known, I would have run a bit slower."
It took Ren Wei nearly half an hour of sitting in a chair to regain his mental faculties. By then, Su Jingming was already happily munching on the grilled skewers Ren Wei had brought, though he winced slightly. "A bit too spicy," he murmured.
Wen Yan immediately reached for a bottle of mineral water, twisted off the cap, and handed it to him. "Only water. No alcohol for you."
Knowing his own abysmal tolerance, Su Jingming nodded obediently. He finished his skewer and looked at the dazed Ren Wei. "What are you staring at? Eat."
Ren Wei grabbed a beer, cracked it open, and downed half of it in one go. His face contorted. "You guys... wait, Ming-ge, when exactly did you get back?"
Su Jingming thought for a moment. "Three days ago. Why?"
"Three days ago and you didn't call me?!" Ren Wei gripped the beer bottle. On his way over, he had prepared a whole mental script about how much Wen Yan had suffered, how much he had changed, and how he was going to give Su Jingming a piece of his mind. But now, seeing them sitting across from him in domestic harmony, his script was useless.
Ren Wei blinked. "So... everything I said on the phone... he heard it?"
Su Jingming nodded. He wiped his mouth with a napkin. "Next time, don't get them so spicy. It’s bad for the stomach."
"Understood," Wen Yan replied smoothly.
Ren Wei felt a migraine coming on. This pair of "dog-men" had caused such a storm years ago that he never would have dreamed they’d reconcile like this.
Before Ren Wei could fully process the situation, Wen Yan’s phone buzzed. He had an urgent matter at the firm and had to leave. Before heading out, he lingered by Su Jingming’s side, whispering into his ear for a long moment. "I'll be back to take you to dinner. Don't eat any more of that spicy food, and absolutely no alcohol."
"I know, I know," Su Jingming said, playfully pushing him toward the door.
Once Wen Yan left, a strange silence settled over the room, broken only by the sound of Su Jingming sipping his water. After a long pause, Ren Wei finally spoke. Now that they were alone, he could ask the questions that were burning in his mind.
"You..." Ren Wei started, then hesitated.
"If you have something to ask, just ask it."
Ren Wei looked at him skeptically. "You must be exhausted at night, huh?"
Su Jingming’s ears instantly turned crimson. He shifted uncomfortably, rolling his wrists. "I’ve spent the last few years cultivating my character, so my temper has improved. But I’m not sure if my fighting skills have gone downhill. Want to test them?"
Ren Wei burst into laughter at the familiar threat. Su Jingming couldn't help but join him, and the two friends shared a moment of genuine, weary mirth.
When the laughter died down, Ren Wei opened another beer. "I really didn't think you'd come back for him."
Su Jingming tilted his head. Ren Wei continued, "You have no idea what Wen Yan was like after you left. He became just like you used to be—hardly spoke, never smiled. Old Zhou even pulled him aside for several 'talks,' worried he had some kind of psychological disorder."
Su Jingming found it hard to imagine a version of Wen Yan who didn't speak or smile.
"Only me, Song Yifei, and Li Yang knew," Ren Wei said softly. "It wasn't a psychological problem. It was just that the person in his heart had run away, and he’d taken Wen Yan’s heart with him."
Su Jingming bit his lip, unsure of how to respond.
"Nothing dramatic happened after that," Ren Wei mused. "Except Wen Yan suddenly turned into a god-tier student. He started gapping the second-place student by huge margins. That poor guy started questioning his own intelligence. Same questions, same exams, yet Wen Yan was consistently scoring dozens of points higher. He was a wreck, that guy."
Su Jingming traced the lines on his palm, a faint smile touching his lips. Over the past two days, he and Wen Yan had tacitly avoided discussing the details of their time apart. Hearing about those five years from a third party felt like a tidal wave crashing over his soul.
Ren Wei took another long swig of beer. "Tell me about you. How have things been with your mother?"
"Nothing special. I barely saw her during high school or university." Su Jingming had become gentler, more willing to communicate, but he had remained a loner. The only person he’d truly talked to was his senior, Sheng Nian.
They talked for the rest of the afternoon. Ren Wei shared that he had followed Su Jingming’s old advice and become a P.E. teacher. As night fell, Ren Wei’s phone began to ring incessantly—his mother, pressuring him to go on another blind date.
He looked annoyed and prepared to decline, but Su Jingming intervened. "Go. Your mom is just worried about you."
Ren Wei’s alcohol tolerance had improved over the years; the beers hadn't affected him at all. He sniffed his shirt. "I should go home and shower first. Are you free tomorrow? Let’s grab a proper meal."
Su Jingming nodded and saw him out, then turned to clean up the mess on the table. Half an hour ago, Wen Yan had messaged him saying he’d be finished with work soon. Su Jingming wasn't in a rush. He suggested a restaurant nearby, threw on his coat, and headed out.
After being cooped up in the hotel for two days, the crisp evening breeze was refreshing. Su Jingming walked among the crowds, his hands tucked into his pockets. His heart felt heavy, the echoes of Ren Wei’s words still ringing in his ears.
*"Wen Yan is a stubborn idiot,"* Ren Wei had said. *"He had the grades to go abroad for further studies, but he insisted on staying here to study Law. Song Yifei told me Wen Yan had a massive fight with his father over his choice of major."*
*"Can you believe it? That was Wen Yan. Eventually, his parents gave in. Song Yifei asked him why he’d throw away such a golden opportunity. Do you know what he said?"*
Su Jingming’s chest had felt tight. *"What did he say?"*
*"He said he was afraid his hero would come back and wouldn't be able to find him. He was afraid the hero would think he was still angry and didn't want him anymore. So, he refused to leave."*
***
